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Safety Bay Bowling Club

Phone: +95 2 72 331

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24.01.2022 This pennant practice is in NEW PENNANT UNIFORM as the club wish to take some photos before we leave for halls head , all members male & female are welcome in the photos in your new uniform. Check the board for departure time or be at the club 11.15. Go the bay!!

22.01.2022 Results after this afternoon's games in men's 4s

22.01.2022 Wednesday funny or not, amongst us are some really stupids go the bay!!! My husband and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c. She said, 'you gave me too much money.'... I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said 'We're sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.' The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change. Do not confuse the people at MacD's. We had to have the garage door repaired. The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'You need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.' We haven't used that repairman since... I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local city council office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deers are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.' IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE. My daughter went to a Mexican fast food and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce. I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.' The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an 'intellectually challenged' co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the beeper was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'what on earth are blind people doing driving?!' She is a government employee..... When my wife and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a service, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. ‘Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.' STAY ALERT! They walk among us, they breed, and they vote.... You now have 2 options... Delete it.. or Send it along to put a smile on someone's face today!. HAHAHAHAHAHA

22.01.2022 ANNOUNCEMENT: Any members , ladies or men who wish to order an extra club polo top with their NAME can order today from the office today ( Tuesday 13th ) between 7.45 to 9am (office will be closed at 9am For pennant practice ) or by Bruno on mob 0401 297 545 ( you must know your size ). Any tops with their names will be paid for before order is placed this Monday . This is your last chance to get a top with your name on it.... Bruno

21.01.2022 Teams for Tuesday 20th Oct, 1st Pennant Day. Good luck everyone

21.01.2022 ANNOUNCEMENT: Last chance to order a new club shirt with your name included. Ring bruno on 0401 297 545 too order . Also all ordered tops with your name must be paid no later than monday or cancelled. You can pay across the bar $55 , if your entitled to a rebate for your 1st shirt keep your receipt for the treasurer to get your rebate. You can also make payment to club account.... BSB:066 000 ACCOUNT: 11459764 With your name in the reference box. See more

19.01.2022 The List has just gone up for the big Melbourne cup day @ the bay on 3rd Nov , limited numbers of 120 so get in quick.

19.01.2022 JOLLY JOKER MENU $20 MEAL DEAL INCLUDES Scooner, Wine, Half measure spirit, Meat & Ham Raffles 5.30 Draw 2 Cards left 6pm

17.01.2022 TO ALL PENNANT PLAYERS: This year the club will trial paying your pennant fees with a VOUCHER purchased from the bar. ( cash is still ok )the voucher will go into the envelope instead of your cash. We all know getting change on a Saturday at the bar can be difficult, and arranging to pay fees on tuesday for ladies when the bar is not open is bloody hard. From now ladies & men will be able to buy a VOUCHER from the bar any day of the week ( WITHIN 7 DAYS ) of the event. Just ask for a ladies or mens pennant VOUCHER @$12 . You can also use your club card account to pay if you have enough money on it. So give it a go and see how it goes.

16.01.2022 What Is Piriformis Syndrome? Is it even a syndrome? How to stretch & strengthen your piriformis muscle below ... Watch all the way to the end

16.01.2022 Community Bowls Week 5 updated ladder. Next week will be the last week before the Xmas break, returning to action on Tuesday 12 Jan 2021. Go the Bay!

14.01.2022 THURSDAY MENS PENNANTS 1st of 2 practice days this Thursday 15th 12.30 for 1.00pm start in club uniform from now on. If you want to order another club shirt with your name, see bruno thursday , last chance this week. If you need black pants, perth bowls centre at canning vale have everything you need as well as city club dress pants for you older folks

13.01.2022 MENS THURSDAY PENNANT PRACTICE: Teams for this thursday 15th at home & in uniform. 12.30 for 1.00pm start. Green fees are $12 per game which also includes the cost of the bus when playing away.... Always check the board for any changes & up to date info. If not available for the next game, put your name in the un-available book for thursday or Saturday before the selectors next meeting mondays. If you put your name in after mondays meeting you must ring a selector and tell them also. See more

13.01.2022 Last night John Biglin has called it a day After 15 years of community bowls at safety bay. John was presented with a lovely gift by President chris owen for his great guidance & support to tuesday community bowls. Well done John Biglin. Go the bay !!

09.01.2022 A young man named Dave bought a horse from a farmer for $250 The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day. The next day, the farmer drove up to Dave's house and said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died" Dave replied, "Well, then just give me my money back" The farmer said, "Can’t do that. I went and spent it already"... Dave said, "Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse" The farmer asked, "What ya gonna do with him?" Dave said, "I’m going to raffle him off" The farmer said, "You can’t raffle off a dead horse!" Dave said, "Sure I can, Watch me. I just won’t tell any body he’s dead" A month Later, the farmer met up with Dave and asked, "What happened with that dead horse?" Dave said, "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at five dollars a piece and made a profit of $2495" The farmer said, "Didn’t anyone complain?" Dave said, "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his five dollars back" See more

08.01.2022 EVEREST FINAL: well its done & dusted for another year at the everest, and our man chris carruthers has done himself & our club proud finishing equal 3rd after going down in the semi-final. A big shoutout to sponsors craig rich for chris & RV solutions for the club. Also a huge shoutout to Russell tyrrell & his volunteers for running a great tournament. Go the bay!

03.01.2022 Hump day funny. Go the bay!

01.01.2022 Awesome Night at Bay Jolly Joker goes down to the last card on Friday, Plus Turkey, Hams & Chichens Pick a box Jackpot Get in early limited numbers due to covid restrictions