Adrian Barker Counselling in West Footscray, Victoria | Marriage therapist

Adrian Barker Counselling

Locality: West Footscray, Victoria

Phone: +61 407 701 556

Address: 638 Barkly St 3012 West Footscray, VIC, Australia

Website: http://www.adrianbarkercounselling.com.au/

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• Medical and health
• Mental health service
• Counsellor
• Marriage therapist

23.01.2022 Most men make a contract with life that completely backfires. It goes like this: If I am a good man and I do things properly, then I will be loved, have my need...s met, and have an easy life. But according to this contract, to "be a good man and do things right" means suppressing your emotions, such as anger. It means always pleasing others, for example never making your partner sad or angry. It means negating yourself to make others happy and to avoid problems. This drains the life from you. It leaves you frustrated, resentful, anxious, depressed, ashamed, angry. It causes others to be frustrated with you and to respect you less. It leads to being walked over in relationships, work, and life. When you truly value yourself, you let go of such psychological contracts. When you exercise the courage of self-respect, you become happy within yourself. Then when you do things for others, it's no longer about getting something, instead it's an overflow of your strength and happiness. The truly good man knows how to put himself first.

21.01.2022 On modern parenting Why this parenting guru says people are being sold a 'Disney-like illusion' about having kids http://www.abc.net.au//parenting-expectation-vs-r/11492418

20.01.2022 Distance can make us closer.. Coronavirus isolation: How to avoid people without feeling depressed There are many ways to look at this time of isolation, and not all are negative. For one thing, we're engaging in an act of solidarity on a scale not seen in our lifetime.(ABC Life: Nathan Nankervis)...Continue reading

20.01.2022 Coronavirus COVID-19: How to look after your mental health when working from home As Australia grapples with the spread of coronavirus, workers are scrambling to figure out how or if they can do their jobs from home. One person who's ahead of the curve is Fiona Wright, a writer and editor who's been working from home in Sydney for over 10 years....Continue reading

20.01.2022 Aim for ‘well being?’ These experts say happiness is 'not actually worth pursuing'. So what should we chase instead? http://www.abc.net.au//coronavirus-stop-chasing-h/12566340

19.01.2022 On modern fatherhood https://www.the-father-hood.com/

18.01.2022 Repeat after me: You are not your thoughts. You are not your thoughts.... You are not your thoughts. Repeat it in front of the mirror, put a reminder on your phone, leave yourself a note on the front of the fridge. Negative self talk can only be described as an incessant commentary on how shit you are, how hard it is, how you are not coping. If this is happening to you, you don’t have to outright ignore them....Treat them with curiosity, think about why those thoughts are there, ask yourself is there truth to them, and ultimately challenge them. Because you are not your thoughts

18.01.2022 ‘Holding space’ for an emotional overwhelm in a child, or perhaps a loved one being triggered by past trauma?

18.01.2022 On Social Media

18.01.2022 Stress, bad decisions and vivid dreams: What is lockdown doing to our brains? http://www.abc.net.au///your-brain-under-lockdown/12611994

16.01.2022 How to talk about the coronavirus Regardless of how old your children are, there’s a helpful way to have the ‘COVID-19 conversation’. Here’s what you need to know. Sharing age-appropriate information with your kids about serious situations is important, and if you’re wondering how to do that in the coronavirus climate, you’re not alone. One thing’s for sure: it’s likely they know a little or a lot about it already, even if they’re small. Young children won’t have much co...Continue reading

14.01.2022 'Some anxiety can be helpful': How to manage your COVID-19 fears These are troubling times. With news of a new virus spreading around the world, and evolving updates of how we should all be protecting ourselves, many Australians are understandably feeling anxious. There are many unknowns about COVID-19. How quickly the virus will spread? What impact will it have on our communities? How will it affect our families? But there are helpful actions which can assist in reducing anx...Continue reading

12.01.2022 I highly recommend Kate, she works with compassion, insight and professionalism. She is highly skilled with couples, teens, women and all types of general counseling. She is currently taking on new clients from her rooms in Niddrie.

11.01.2022 Actually had good reports on these...

10.01.2022 How to make your relationship thrive (not crumble) in self-isolation. It’s the joke that COVID-19 built. What does your husband get if he doesn’t stop singing ‘M-m-m-m-myyyy Corona’? wrote one Twitter user. Bigger problems on his hands than a worldwide pandemic. It echoes the fear embedded in countless new memes: that our romantic relationships might crumble under unusually close quarters....Continue reading

10.01.2022 Strategies for isolation.. Shared by a friend After having thirty-one sessions this week with patients where the singular focus was COVID-19 and how to cope, I decided to consolidate my advice and make a list that I hope is helpful to all. I can't control a lot of what is going on right now, but I can contribute this. ...Continue reading

10.01.2022 Highly recommended!

07.01.2022 How to stop saying yes when you want to say no http://www.abc.net.au//the-graceful-art-of-saying/11563272

07.01.2022 How do you form new friendships as an adult? http://www.abc.net.au//how-to-make-new-friends-as/11973524

07.01.2022 Maaate: why men need to keep their friends Is it coded into men’s DNA that they shed their male friends once they get married or enter into a long-term relationship with a woman? Why is it that the friendships they do form tend to be with the husbands of their wife’s friends, or the fathers of their children’s friends (dad friends), which tend to fade away over time? The de-friending phenomenon, particularly among middle-aged men, has been receiving attention recently from ...psychologists, spurred by research into the long-term health costs of loneliness (social isolation has been shown to reduce longevity: in Australia, women live on average four years longer than men). Many men, whose identity is tied up with their job, are happy to let their wives be their social director, says Greg Pankhurst, a clinical psychologist whose client base in western Sydney is mainly male. This can become a problem if a marriage breaks down, or after retirement if a bloke’s social network has been limited to his work colleagues. When men are asked why they don’t have mates outside their wife’s social network, they usually plead lack of time or that they can’t be bothered. But can this really just be chalked up to emotional laziness? Could it be that some heterosexual men feel weirded out by pursuing friendships with other men, out of fear of it being perceived as gay? Pankhurst believes this may be a factor, even in a country like Australia with a long tradition of mateship. While the richness of female friendship is so often celebrated (from the film Steel Magnolias to the Netflix hit Dead to Me), close male friendship is often patronisingly described as a bromance. Studies consistently show that women not only have more close friends than men but are more likely to keep them over a lifetime, notes Pankhurst. This is a hangover of traditional gender roles. Working-class men also find it more challenging to reach out [for counselling] than white-collar men. Men become especially bad at forming friendships as they grow older, when it becomes more important to do so. A British survey released late last year found almost one in five men had no close friends (compared to about one in eight women), and suffered far greater loneliness after retirement. Pankhurst’s simple message for men is to stay in contact with their friends. The best support is the informal kind, from mates who genuinely like you. https://www.theage.com.au//maaate-why-men-need-to-keep-the

06.01.2022 66 Days to 'make' a (new healthy) habit (could this apply to you for meditation, positive thinking, good self care?) Want to make a New Year’s resolution permanent? There are ways to train your brain The discarded financial savings plan, the series of lapsed diets, the exercise regimen that starts with a bang and ends just as abruptly Most of us have very little trouble beginning the process of kicking a bad habit, but sticking to the repetitive and tedious routines that re...Continue reading

05.01.2022 I’ve had some excellent feedback on this Mens Group format that runs in various locations around Melbourne https://mensgroup.melbourne/

04.01.2022 Men and mental health - and about getting bogged.. https://www.facebook.com/72924719987/posts/10161449384654988/?vh=e

04.01.2022 Why we actually can believe worrying is useful and it can be so difficult to let go of our anxiety. https://www.psychologytoday.com//the-secret-reason-why-you

02.01.2022 Covid and Growth

01.01.2022 TRAFFIC has gone, FUEL is affordable, BILLS extended. KIDS are at home with their FAMILIES. PARENTS are home taking care of their CHILDREN.... FAST FOOD replaced by HOME COOKED MEALS. Hectic SCHEDULES replaced by NAPS, REST, and RELAXATION. The AIR seems CLEANER. The WORLD quieter. PEOPLE are conscious about HYGIENE and HEALTH. MONEY doesn't make the WORLD GO ROUND anymore. DESIGNER clothing is pointless as nobody ever really needed it. DOCTORS AND NURSES are being praised and recognized instead of athletes and celebrities. And WE now have TIME, finally, to STOP and SMELL the ROSES. ... The positive side above all!! Copied, pasted, reposted Please take a moment to be thankful for every thing you have at this moment in time!

01.01.2022 Interesting... https://www.smh.com.au//like-living-a-dual-reality-the-str