Advantage Tyres Townsville Pty Ltd | Automotive repair centre

Advantage Tyres Townsville Pty Ltd

Phone: +61 7 4774 3145

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• Businesses
• Automotive repair centre
• Vehicle shop
• Vehicle parts store
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• Vehicle parts shop

24.01.2022 Have a great weekend we are open this morning for business at both stores hermit park and bohle

23.01.2022 THE NUN AND THE HIPPIE A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?" "No," she replies, "Im married to God." She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.... The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: "I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!" "Yeah?", says the hippie. "Yeah!", say the bus driver. "She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray, so all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God." The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next Tuesday night. "I am God," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face. Have sex with me." The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex as she is desperate not to lose her virginity. God agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her. As he finishes, he jumps up, throws back his hood with a flourish and cries "Ha-ha, Im the hippie!" "Ha-ha," cries the nun. "Im the bus driver!"

22.01.2022 My Friday dance when leaving work!!

21.01.2022 Yep!! Pretty spot on!!

21.01.2022 How’s your Xmas break been? Ours granddaughters, mother in law, my children and their partners had Hit the shops yesterday did 1/2 hour then over it!! If left unattended this would be Shay.... caption this!!

21.01.2022 Happy weekend everyone a joke to lighten the day!! I could imagine Shay doing this to me!!!! Mary was taken before the judge accused of theft, and he asked her, 'What did you steal?' 'A small can of peaches,' Mary replied, weeping. The judge then asked her why she had stolen the peaches, and she replied that she was hungry. The judge then inquired, 'And how many peaches were in the can?' Mary answered, 'Only 6 small pieces.' The judge harshly announced, 'Then I will give you 6 days in jail.' But before the judge could finish pronouncing the punishment, the woman's husband, Derek, interrupted and asked the judge if he could say something? The judge, slightly annoyed asked, 'And what have you to say in your wife's defence?' Derek spoke clearly, 'She also stole a large can of peas.'

20.01.2022 Yesterday we said goodbye to darren dyne next week a new look youll see more off the the old team shay, Christina and her daughters Maddii and Alex so let the good times roll!! Good old fashion service by the family of owned business

20.01.2022 Advantage Tyres Townsville Pty Ltd fantastic job new car and wheels on a new car big thanks to Kevin toms the manager 20/10 mate

20.01.2022 A bit of humour for this fine sunny Monday!! One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night." the mailman comments. Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the firs...t I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday morning. We had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood over for Christmas Cheer and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I." The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that?" Well all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is." The mailman laughs and says, "Damn, Im sorry I missed that." Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up four or five times."

20.01.2022 A bit of light humour for the day! I know the covid-19 is devastating but here we go putting it in prospective!!

20.01.2022 Fun fact Tuesday!! Look smarter then your friends!! Clouds may look very lightweight but the science says otherwise. The average cumulus cloud you can see during the sunny day, weight around 500,000 kg (1.1 million pounds).

18.01.2022 Happy Sunday evening

18.01.2022 STOLEN from south of Homehill Inkerman on highway , it a Honda 1000 near new around 30 hours on clock with mag wheels . If anyone knows anything about it please ring me text me or call the police . There is a reward

17.01.2022 Tyre service fitter, experience essential this will be a full time position for the right applicant

17.01.2022 Yep!! Happy Boxing Day enjoy!!

16.01.2022 Happy Monday everyone

16.01.2022 TGIF An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Fridayevening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for hisgirlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring andshowed it to him.... The old man said, "I dont think you understand, I want something veryspecial." At that Statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and broughtanother ring over. "Heres a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said. The youngladys eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "Well take it." The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, bycheck. "I know you need to make sure my check is good, so Ill write itnow and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and Ill pickthe ring up Monday afternoon," he said. Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "Theres nomoney in that account." "I know," said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?" Dont mess with Old People. See more

15.01.2022 Our little visitor for the day!!

15.01.2022 Fun tyre fact Tuesday In the early 1960s Goodyear decided to develop an illuminated tire. These tires were made with a transparent rubber with lights mounted on the inner rim. During the day they looked a little odd but at night they glowed in the dark! These tires ended up being only a prototype because the rubber was too expensive. It was too expensive to power the bulbs and the lights became invisible once the tires got dirty.

15.01.2022 A bit of fun to lighten your Tuesday Paddy's walking home from the pub when he finds a woman tied to the railway track. He frees her and takes her home where they make passionate love all night.... The next day Paddy's drinking with Seamus when he boasts about the night before. "So what does she look like Paddy?" asks Seamus. "I don't know," replies Paddy. "I haven't found her head yet!"

15.01.2022 Hump day joke!! You Will Hate Fridays!!! One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting with the devil... Satan: Why so glum? Guy: What do you think? Im in hell! Satan: Hells not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. Are you a drinking man? Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Satan: Well youre gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays thats all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab and colas.... We drink till we throw up and then we drink some more! And we dont worry about getting a hangover because youre dead anyway. Guy: Gee, that sounds great! Satan: You a smoker? Guy: You better believe it! Satan: All right! Youre gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer no biggie, youre already dead, remember? Guy: Wow... thats awesome! Satan: I bet you like to gamble. Guy: Why yes, as a matter of fact I do. Satan: Cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots. If you go bankrupt... youre dead anyhow. Do you do drugs?? Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You dont mean... Satan: Thats right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack, or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, youre dead, who cares. Guy: WOW! I never realized Hell was such a cool place! Satan: You gay? Guy: No... Satan: Ooooh Youre gonna hate Fridays. See more

13.01.2022 A bit of mid week humour

13.01.2022 Happy 22nd birthday Maddii deep in concentration cutting her cake!!

12.01.2022 Unfortunately for our staff we are open at both stores 7.30-10.30 enjoy your weekend if you need after hours work done call Shay on 0400016375 to pre organise

12.01.2022 Happy new year 2021 another decade gone 45 this year where have the years gone!!!

12.01.2022 Another day at the underwear store... A man walks up to the counter. "Two pairs of underwear please." The man behind the counter looks at him in disbelief. "Only two pairs of underwear?"... "Yup. I wear one while the other is in the wash." The man behind the counter looks at him in disgust, then rings out his order.> A second man walks in. "5 pairs of underwear please." "Only 5 eh?" "Yeah, I wear one for every weekday, then go commando all the weekend." The man behind the counter shakes his head. "Well, you're better then the last guy!" A third man walks in. "7 pairs of underwear please." "Finally, a man who knows hygiene!" "Yes, I do try. One for every day, and I do my laundry on Sunday." At the end of the day, a fourth man walks into the underwear store. "12 pairs of underwear please." "Wow! You must be really clean!" The man smiles. "Yup, that's me! Err, hang on, let me see if I counted right. January, February, March, April..."

10.01.2022 Two years ago working on this baby

09.01.2022 Its the weekend we are open!! Bohle 7,30-10.30 am Hermit park 8-11am

09.01.2022 Maddii Louise Sexton

08.01.2022 Signs your getting old!! 1. Your houseplants are alive, and you cant smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.... 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 6:00 a.m. is when you get up, not when you go to bed. 5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator. 6. You watch the Weather Channel. 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up. 8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as dressed up. 10. Youre the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door wont turn down the stereo. 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you. 12. You dont know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. 13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. 14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers. 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. 16. You take naps. 17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. 18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach. 19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer pretty good sh!t. 21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. 22. I just cant drink the way I used to replaces Im never going to drink that much again. 23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. 24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. 25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking Oh sh!t what the hell!

08.01.2022 Thats a way of looking at for people like me that like the toilet roll put on my way!! CT

07.01.2022 We are closed Monday due to show day holiday

06.01.2022 Tyre safety tips 101 Tyres will lose pressure over time and its important that you check them at least once a month. Driving with underinflated tyres is dangerous as it affects the handling of your car, worsens your fuel economy and can cause tyre damage. On the other hand, driving with overinflated tyres is also equally hazardous. Not only will your tyres have less grip and contact on the road, but theyll also wear out quicker and have a higher chance of bursting. The recommendations for tyre pressure can be found on a label located on the drivers doorframe .

06.01.2022 Have you had your tyres checked? Drop in for a free Tyre check we also offer humm for the big and little things in your life!!

06.01.2022 Who remembers these?? Our Tyre art display

05.01.2022 What a day our son Luka turns 9 today the years have flown by at 1.20 am this little man came into our lives

04.01.2022 Who else feels this way after EOFY!!!

03.01.2022 A bit of humour for this Tuesday Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, showed up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25 year-old blonde. She knocks everyones socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and hangs over Bobs arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club were all aghast.... At the very first chance, they cornered him and asked, "Bob, howd you get the trophy girlfriend?" Bob replied, "Girlfriend? Shes my wife!" Theyre knocked over, but continued to ask. "So, howd you persuade her to marry you?" "I lied about my age", Bob replied. "What, did you tell her - that you were only 50?" Bob smiled and said, "No, I told her I was 90."

02.01.2022 Tyre fact!! The writing on side walls of tyres- The Raised white letter tyres are produced in the same design or, lets say, fashion as whitewalls. An extra step covers the sidewall with black, then grinds the rubber off the letters to the white how through.