Audrey J de Witte Counselling in New Lambton, New South Wales, Australia | Medical and health

Audrey J de Witte Counselling

Locality: New Lambton, New South Wales, Australia

Phone: +61 428 370 669

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24.01.2022 A Poinsettia Christmas For so many people the Christmas season can generate a jumble of emotions. Especially when we have experienced the death of loved ones, or, are living with the knowledge that death is partnering with us in some way. Often the focus can be on what is lost, or, what we are losing. This causes an endless tunnel of grief and sadness. While we need to live with the reality of loss, I have learnt to refocus my thoughts on all that I have gained because I have... loved, and been loved by those who have died. This is the first year I will experience Christmas without my parents, and also without a dear old friend who died during the year. I acknowledge the pain of these losses. Yet, I also give thanks for all that my parents gave to me, and also the gift of friendship from my friend. My life is richer because of them. My memories of them, and shared love, also means that they are always part of me. My mother loved her Poinsettia which grew on her front verandah. She was so proud of it. Every time I see a Poinsettia now, I remember her, smile, and give thanks for who she will always be to me. You are blessed by all that you have gained, through those who are no longer living.

24.01.2022 This article is so worth your time reading ... won’t take you long. We really need to know about this stuff and talk about it with each other. https://www.abc.net.au//what-i-wish-i-knew-when-m/11059022

22.01.2022 I know Graeme and was around when he attempted suicide. I have found Graeme to be wise person to listen to on the topic of 'Depression'. When a person has depression it is something that will always be part of their lives. Learning to live with it, and manage it, will help a person have a fulfilling and content life. Graeme also has a lot of wisdom for those who live with someone with depression. Check out his books and his website.

22.01.2022 So ... on the 3rd day of a new year, I have a YouTube video for you. I came across a young woman by the name of Claire Wineland a few years ago, right after she died actually. No, don't turn away, it really isn't that depressing. Claire was born with Cystic Fibroses. From a very early age she lived with the knowledge that she was dying. Her motto became: 'Live a life you can be proud of.' This story of Claire will change how you view yourself, how you view life, and also how ...you view death. It will take up about 40 minutes of your life. You don't have to watch it all at once, you can stop the video and come back to it. I encourage you to watch and listen to Claire's story. Be inspired. Live deeper. https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=jfqtOTwUcKE

20.01.2022 Gentle words can soothe harsh, angry ones. Be gentle with one another.

20.01.2022 How could a 'cow' become an 'antidepressant' for one man, and pull him out of depression? Oh you need to read this article. It is a little long, but so true and helpful. (It is also promoting a book, one I haven't read - but the article says so much)

18.01.2022 Be kind, live a life of kindness, and watch people transform before your eyes. May 'kindness' become one of your most treasured values. (Zygocactus from our Tuncurry garden)

17.01.2022 After you're dead, how do you want to be remembered? I conducted a Memorial service last week of a man I knew during my childhood. The night before the service I was handed a large document that he had written. In it he gave his life history, his achievements, he also wrote about his family. Yet, one of the most important things he wrote about, was about how he would like to be remembered. This document, I hope, will become a well treasured document for his family. I see it a...s an enduring gift. I encourage everyone to write a similar document. A record of those things that you have learnt during your life; knowledge you have gained; what you valued most; and yes, how you would like to be remembered. I am reminded of a great book I read a few years ago, entitled 'The Last Lecture'. I recommend it to everyone. Randy Pausch was a Professor chosen to present a lecture as if he knew it was his to be his last. When he initially accepted the task he didn't know that he would be months away from dying. Before he was due to give the lecture he learnt that his cancer had become terminal. He went ahead with the lecture. (I have included a link to the Wikipedia entry about the book to give you an idea of what it's about.) So, my question to you, how do you want to be remembered? Write it down and tell your loved ones where it is, or give it to them to keep until it is required. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Lecture

17.01.2022 We, as a human race, are in uncertain and uncharted times. Anxiety and stress levels are high. However, when we reflect on our past, our history, as a human race, there have been many difficult passages throughout time, which we have been challenged to face. This has been the reality since humans first walked on the earth’s surface. We are fragile creatures. Life is fragile. We are being reminded of this daily, hourly at present. On my morning walk I came across a number of s...piderwebs. I love it when the dew creates all these little jewels along each strand of the web. They seems so magical, so delicate. Yet, if you do a basic search on the strength of a strand of spiderweb you will soon discover that it is five times stronger than steel. You will also discover that in many cases, each strand is made up of many nano strands, all woven together. If some clever person were able to gather many, many spiderweb strands. Twine them together to the thickness of an average human. It could stop a passenger plane in flight. Wow! Yes, human life is fragile. Yet, when we work together, and stand together, we can achieve what we thought impossible. History is full of examples of humans achieving the ‘impossible’. Life - our personal life, and community life - will always be filled with unexpected events. It really is the nature of being human. But there is untapped strength within you, which will help you find ways through, over, around, or under whatever is before you. And when you combine your strength and resilience with another, you, and we as a collective, will be stronger. Take time each day to draw a long breath, look around you, look inside you. Recognise your strength, your uniqueness, your resilience and know you have what is needed to take one step at a time. You have what is needed to make changes, and face the constantly changing world around you. Just like the spiderweb, each day we are a slightly different creation.

17.01.2022 Grief is different for each of us.

17.01.2022 COUNSELLING PRACTICE CLOSED If you have found yourself reading this, looking for a counsellor, I need to inform that I have CLOSED my Counselling Practice. A number of things are going on in my life, and I cannot give my complete focus to my business. I love helping people find their own solutions to issues and problems that arise in their lives, but I cannot give my all at present.... However, I may, from time to time, continue to post things on this page. The best kind of counselling is to find a good friend, or a confidant, and just talk. Hearing your own words, and having someone reflect them back to you (without giving any kind of advice) is the best way to understand your issue and try and work out how to find a solution. No one can solve your issues, only you can.

16.01.2022 Over the years I have come to believe that there was a link between physical pain and depression, anxiety and a few other emotional traits. This ABC story has confirmed my observations. https://www.abc.net.au//study-shows-chronic-pain-/11760024

15.01.2022 For all the fellas, check it out.

15.01.2022 Parkinson’s is something not a lot of people understand. If you have ten minutes today, watch this interview. Heather is a remarkable soul. Her honesty is touching. https://pdwise.com/stor/five-questions-for-heather-kennedy/

14.01.2022 What words, or knowledge, do you want to leave behind? Over the past 3 weeks I have posted sections of 'Desiderata' by Max Ehrmann, along with some of my favourite photos that I have taken over the years - hope it meant something to you. Max Ehrmann was a lawyer, in 1927 he wrote in his diary the words that we now know as 'Desiderata'. Max wanted to leave something behind, a "humble gift", so the story goes.... Perhaps 'Desiderata' is a compilation of what Max had learnt was most important, knowledge he had gained that he wanted to pass on. Interesting that it was only after his death that his words became so famous. So what knowledge would you want to pass onto future generations about what you have learnt? Do tell. Share it with me.

12.01.2022 It's okay to keep parts of yourself from others, people don't need to know everything about you. However, don't hide from yourself - learn all there is about who you are - like yourself 'warts and all' - accept the reality of 'you' - keep learning and discovering things about who you really are until you are comfortable in your own skin. Then you won't need to tell people who you are, they will see it.

11.01.2022 Peace, which is authentic, cannot be achieved by fighting for it. ( Audrey de Witte October 2018)

08.01.2022 It's over a year since my father died. It was unexpected, however, for me not entirely. I had a sense at the start of 2018 something significant was going to happen during the year - and this intuition proved right. (A number of significant things occurred in 2018 actually.) So, I have experienced grief intimately once more. Each time grief becomes more prominent in my life, it comes a little differently. What I have reflected upon over this last year, is the last 24hours of... my father's life (as well as many other things about him of course). There were a few curious things that happened, in particular the last time I saw him alive, which have me wondering whether he knew what was ahead of him. I will always wonder I suppose, but I find comfort in how my father acted during that final visit. It was different. I also remember, almost in clear detail, my time with dad in the ICU where the medical team were trying everything to save him, after a botched operation. (I'll always maintain the surgeon got it wrong, I remember his initial words very clearly - those first words often hold the truth.) I will always remember holding his hand, as I told the medical team to stop what they were doing, I knew, and they certainly knew, that my father was not going to survive - they had tried everything. Just as dad breathed his last breath, he opened his left eye (he had his eyes closed the whole time prior to this) and looked at me. It was our goodbye, it was also the acknowledgment of the promises I had made. I sent him off with a blessing, our love, and a large sob. I have some strange regrets. I regret not making cheese sandwiches for him. Funny huh. Dad loved his cheese, the Hospital menu didn't offer cheese. A number of times I suggested that I make some cheese sandwiches and bring them on my next visit. He always said not to bother. I wished I had. But I'm learning to live with that regret. I regret also not setting up FaceTime for dad to talk to mum, I had done this before when he was in Hospital and mum couldn't get to visit due to all her health restrictions. Another regret that is becoming less significant. I did bring him a wonderful chocolate/caramel tart a few days before his death, which he finished before I even said hello - chocolate/caramel tarts carry a special memory now. Learning to live with grief in our lives is important. Acknowledging all the emotions and strange regrets we have, is also important. Grief is not going anywhere, best to understand it and make a place for it in your life. (This photo is of my parents taken a few years ago by my older brother, Jeff)

07.01.2022 Amazing photos - wise words.

03.01.2022 Something to think seriously about. It is so easy to be mean and spiteful behind an electronic screen and keyboard. May 'kindness' be our law.

02.01.2022 'Grief' is not just something that happens to us. Sadness, sorrow, and a sense of loss are feelings we experience when we encounter death (or another kind of significant loss) - these happen to us. 'Grief', on the other hand, needs to be learned. "We aren't taught to grieve; we are taught to handle grief, to resolve grief, to get on the other side of it." (From Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson) I wonder what you have learnt about grief? What knowledge have you gained about it? W...hat wisdom have you learnt? (Photo: Rock Orchid from our garden in Tuncurry)

01.01.2022 Who can heal? Recently there has been a lot of chatter, and speculation, in the media about whether the President Elect of the USA can heal the nation. No, he cannot. No leader can.... The only ones who can heal broken relationships, communities, families, nations, and so on, are those in the mix of the brokenness. Healing is a choice. Just as causing hurt, chaos, disruption, and conflict is a choice. When people take to the streets, line themselves up against another, speak angry words, throw rocks, and point guns at each other. It’s a choice. What does all this achieve anyway? Perhaps it is long past time that you and I stop expecting someone else to heal the conflicts, and brokenness around us. Perhaps it is time we examine our words before we let them loose, or our actions before we carry them out. Do our words and actions tear down, or build up? Yes, healing is possible. Even the healing of a nation. However, it takes the positive, caring, unselfish, words and actions of everyone. Therein lies the difficult choice. What do you choose?