Behavioural Assistance Therapy in Ballarat, Victoria | Medical and health
Behavioural Assistance Therapy
Locality: Ballarat, Victoria
Phone: +61 410 845 587
Address: Ballarat Business Centre, 15 Dawson Street, 3350 Ballarat, VIC, Australia
Website: http://www.subconsciousresearch.com.au/
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25.01.2022 How can a little child make everyone feel so incompetent! In all my years in the helping profession, I have never seen emotions as intense as I experience when ...helping children and families on the spectrum. Whether it be fighting among parents and caregivers, battling between families and schools, struggles with professionals or battles with government agencies and insurance providers, the frustrations for all parties become strong and emotions high. People point fingers, throw names and accusations around, and threaten action against each other. What I realized quite early is nothing makes parents, professionals, and teachers feel more incompetent than a challenging child with autism. These children often do not respond as favorably to the typical parenting, teaching, and treatment strategies that work so well with other children. Their behaviors are so often difficult to read, and their needs are often hidden and inconsistent. They process information differently than us, so their judgment and reasoning do not match ours. They respond well to one strategy this week to fight against it the next. Just when they begin to show progress, they suddenly regress and fall backward. They can be excited with glee one minute and screaming for their life the next. They can be so unpredictable that the best of minds become flustered in confusion. Nothing makes us adults feel more vulnerable than (1) not being in control, (2) not knowing what to do, and (3) having others demanding that we change. Whether it be parents who feel the stares, the negative comments, and accusations that the childs behavior is the result of their poor parenting, or the teacher who has to somehow provide strong individual accommodations for one child, while trying to meet the needs of the total classroom (especially when no one may know what the problems are), or the professional who exhausts all the common therapy tricks in their toolboxes, we all have to admit, that no one can make us feel more vulnerable and inadequate than children on the spectrum. They are so consistently inconsistent and fluctuate from what they need from one minute to the next. We all have a great need to feel safe, accepted, and competent, and the challenging child on the spectrum threatens that need all the time. The principle often spoke by Dr. Ross Greene, author of the The Explosive Child, that all children do the best that they can, given the demands that they are under, and their ability to effectively deal with them applies to all of us. If someone (parent, teacher, professional) is frustrated, angry, and acting inappropriately, we should immediately assume that they do not feel competent in dealing with the demands they are currently dealing with. Just like we do not want everyone to do with our children (demand, scold, punish), we do with each other. We demand, direct, and pressure others into doing something that they do not know how to provide. They feel inadequate and threaten, then they fight back (just like our children). This is a natural reaction as human beings, rather they are adults or children, on or off the spectrum. When we are faced with uncertainty and anxiety, we feel vulnerable and want to escape and avoid. When pressured, our fight or flight response kicks in and emotions fly. We all need to remember that this vulnerability affects all of us, and we need to take a deep breath, assume that others are feeling just as frustrated and inadequate as us, and validate and support each other. Focus on what each other is doing right and foster our strengths. Find common ground and facilitate the positive. Understand and validate before we demand change. Acknowledge that we do not have the answers, and that is ok! If we collaborate together in understanding the child, we will eventually find the path to help. Assume that the journey will be filled with hills and valleys, triumphs and backslides and that no matter how competent you are, they can always bring you to your knees. This is the life of children on the spectrum, as well as for all of us that love them so much. Lets look behind all the negative actions to understand the vulnerabilities in all of us. For us to effectively collaborate, we need to be working partners with each other. This series on Acceptance and Understanding can be found in the blue book, Autism Discussion Page on the Core Challenges of Autism.
25.01.2022 Reducing Anxiety #5 Teaching New Coping Skills Most acting out behavior from children on the spectrum is an attempt to escape or avoid situations that overwhel...m them or do not know how to handle them. Because the world is filled with much uncertainty and chaos, the children are very hyper-alert and on guard for situations that they do not know what to expect and how to handle it. Consequently, when put in situations of uncertainty, they go into panic and fight or flight stress response. At first, we can help them by making the world more understandable and predictable. We can help lower anxiety and uncertainty by providing strong structure and predictability to their day and by preparing them before heading into events by previewing what they can expect and what is expected of them. This helps avoid some of the uncertainty that freaks our kids out. However, the world is very dynamic and represents continuous change and uncertainty, and the children eventually need to learn how to cope with uncertainty and deal with anxiety. This is one of the most important tools that we can teach the children; to feel competent in the face of uncertainty, feel confident tackling anxiety, and learn coping skills for regulating their emotions. To tackle uncertainty, you need two primary strategies: (1) teaching coping skills to deal with anxiety and (2) providing gradual exposure to uncertainty to learn how to use the coping skills successfully. There are several steps with each strategy that needs to be considered Learning coping skills 1) First, you must choose one or two coping skills that might fit well for the child. That will depend on the age, interests, cognitive abilities, and sensory preferences of the child. These can include deep pressure calming techniques, deep breathing, muscle relaxation, positive distracting thoughts, counting, singing to self, fidget items, focusing on special interests, power cards, etc. 2) Next, the child needs to learn how to use these techniques when not under stress. They need to practice with you when calm, role-playing situations, and learning to feel competent before testing them under fire. We make the mistake of discussing the coping skills with the child and then expecting the child to use them in the heat of the moment. Even though the child may intellectually understand what to do, they are not able to perform under fire, leaving both the child feeling more incompetent and the parents feeling confused (He knew what to do, we discussed it ahead of time. Why didn’t he do it!)? Knowing what to do and being able to do it are two different things. They must rehearse the technique in role-playing situations to become skillful in implementing it. The role-playing must be lifelike, with coaching from the parent. We usually do this by having the parents and child list current situations that cause stress and write them on index cards. Each day they pick out a couple of cards and role-play the situations, practicing the coping skills. The parents and children do it together, often switching roles and having fun practicing the coping skills. 3) Finally, we often create little snags during the day to practice coping skills. This creates real-life situations during the daily routine, which produce mild stress to practice the coping skills on the spot. There are two aspects to this: 1) Parents will often create little snags for themselves when their child is with them, so the parents can highlight themselves using the coping skills. For example, while doing something with your child, make a simple mistake. While talking out loud, display initial frustration, Oh no! I just tore the paper! Ok...I need to take a deep breath, count to five, and say, ‘I can handle this.’ This way, the child can see you successfully using the technique under stress. Then (2) create simple, mild snags into the child’s day where you can immediately pause and coach the child in using the coping techniques. Gradual Exposure to Uncertainty 1) Once the child learns how to successfully use coping skills, it is time to up the ante. Make a list of everyday stressful situations for the child, creating a hierarchy of least to most anxiety-provoking situations. The beginning of the list consists of minor snags that will stress the child, but not overwhelming stress. Schedule and plan out frequent situations on the easy list, so the child has frequent practice using the coping strategies in easy situations. 2) If possible, prepare the child ahead of time, Okwe are going to the store. Now, remember the noise and activity sometimes bothers you. Remember the coping skills we use for this? If needed, briefly practice them before going into the situation. 3) When in the event, watch your child closely. As he starts to look a little stressed, pause and coach him, Okwe are getting a little stressed, less practice our deep breathing and counting. Focus on how successful you both are at handling the situation. 4) As the child becomes skillful in using the techniques in mild events, they build feelings of competence and confidence in using the skills. As they learn to cope with the mild events, start to gradually work your way up the hierarchy, keeping the anxiety low enough so they can feel it, but is not overwhelming (just right challenge). Focus on doing it together and feeling the mastery of tackling the anxiety. This helps build strong feelings of I can do it! By using these two strategies, the child starts to feel more confident and comfortable in tackling stressful situations. What you will notice is, as the child learns better ways of coping, he becomes less anxious in these situations. His fight or flight response gets reset to a higher level, so he does not panic at the first signs of anxiety. He begins to feel more competent facing uncertainty and anxiety. This will help the child learn to cope with the daily stressors that will be inevitable in his life. This series on stress and anxiety can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
25.01.2022 Hyperactivity and Autism Individuals with autism typically have "executive functioning" problems, which are shared with ADD and ADHD. These include poor impuls...e control, working memory, organization, and problem-solving skills. They can have difficulty concentrating, but become hyper-focused on an activity of interest. They can be bright but cannot organize themselves to get through the day. You may tell them what to do once they get to school but never remember to follow-through with it. They may impulsively act without thinking even though you discussed the consequences ahead of time. Also, they often share problems in arousal that are common with hyperactivity in ADHD. When you combine low arousal with poor impulse control, you get very disorganized behavior. Now, if the child has overlying ADHD with autism, you will get very poor ability to focus, control impulses, or organize his behavior. The frontal lobes of the brain are not getting enough stimulation. In such cases, stimulants (medication) are used to arouse that area of the brain. When that part of the brain is stimulated correctly, the child can focus and organize his behavior. However, for many on the spectrum, stimulants (Ritalin, Adderall, etc.) may make your child more active, or even aggressive. However, if the symptoms are truly ADHD, these medications will probably show good results. It can be difficult to tell at first if the childs hyperactive behavior is the result of his autism or possible ADHD problems. How does your child seem at home, in class, and in other settings? If his behavior seems scattered across settings, he has difficulty maintaining focus, and he cannot seem to benefit from instruction and guidance due to a very poor ability to regulate his behavior, then I would consider ADHD. Dont be fooled by a childs ability to focus for hours on something that he enjoys, such as video games. The child with attention deficits often can focus on activities of strong interest or of high stimulation. That is because the pre-frontal lobes of the brain (executive functions) are stimulated and aroused. If the task is not stimulating (boring) or has no meaning for them, then the child cannot maintain attention. This is not a willful or intentional response. It is a brain wiring or neurotransmitter issue. The three major common ways to calm, alert and organize the nervous is using bio-medical methods (digestive, dietary, immune system, etc.), sensory techniques to calm and alert, and if needed, possible trial period on medication. If you try medication, you should see good results if it is truly an ADHD problem. If you dont see good results stop using them. If you are looking for ideas to use a sensory diet to deal with attention issues, then view the slide presentation on Sensory Diet. You can find this in the Photo (albums) section of the page. This series on challenging behavior can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
24.01.2022 Preference-Based Learning! I am a firm believer that with children on the spectrum, your best motivator is to take their narrow interests and build them into th...e teaching opportunities. Many children on the spectrum have to see value in what you are trying to teach them to be interested in learning. To increase motivation, incorporate into your teaching what interests the child. Often that may be a fixation on trains, Legos, Mario, baseball statistics, fans, appliances, etc. You can read and write about it, research it, categorize it, and build math, science, and history around it. If your son is interested in vacuums, then build a variety of learning experiences around vacuums. You could help him look up the different brands online, read the different descriptions, research the pros and cons of each type, compare and contrast the various brands, learn the mechanics of how vacuums work, and categorize the brands based on the specifications. You can research the history and development of the vacuum, the advances over time, and contemplate future directions the technology could go in the future. You could have him make his a catalog by categorizing vacuums by brand and model, what type of attachments come with them, what type of power train drives them, the amount of electrical power each uses, how much they cost, what type of replacement parts are available, which pick up water as well as dirt, what the consumer reports ratings are, and which vacuums have the best guarantees. You could pick up a broken vacuum at a junkyard and take it apart. Look at the different parts and what function they serve. He can learn how to take it apart and put it back together again, how to order parts, refurbish old vacuum, and even resale them! If he is younger, you can write simple stories around a make-believe vacuum cleaner and the experiences he has (the family that he is with, how each family member uses him, which room he likes the vacuum the best, how each carpet feels, what it feels like when he is filled up with dirt, etc.) Look for the video, "The Brave Little Toaster." It is a movie about a house full of animated appliances, and they have a vacuum in that. The learning opportunities are endless! For older kids, there are books on how vacuums work, how to repair them, how to sell them. There are instruction videos on how to use them and repair them. Google vacuum cleaners, and you can come up with numerous ways of using vacuums to expand learning. There isnt anything that you cannot build learning around. With kiddos on the spectrum, you often have to look closely to see what their passions are. We often want to ignore the fixations or suppress them because they are odd or different; in favor of something we value more. However, these passions are the key to their world and motivation. Find them and use them! This series on Strengths and interests can be found in the green book. Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School, and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
24.01.2022 PDA! The British psychologist Elizabeth Newson came up with a term which describes PDA as an "anxiety-driven need to be in control and avoid other peoples dema...nds and expectations". Pretty much, yes. I thought it might be interesting to look back and reflect on how PDA has affected our lives since Js diagnosis back at the end of last year. Lightbulb Moment Like many people, we had the lightbulb moment when we leant about PDA, which funnily enough was not through reading anything at all on the Internet! Crazy but true! I was going through a bit of a rough time myself with depression and Js behaviour, and the wife of my colleague at work recommended a counsellor. I booked an appointment, spent the whole allotted time talking about J and the troubles we were experiencing and right at the end she said, Have you heard about PDA? I obviously hadnt, but she said with everything I had told her, it certainly sounded like it! On returning home I spoke with my husband and that night we devoured everything we could on the subject and click lightbulb moment! It was as if we were reading specifically about J. We literally couldnt believe it! Just reading about other parents experiencing the same problems as us made us not feel so alone. We werent the only ones! Other parents were experiencing similar issues with their child/ren, and sometimes a whole lot worse too Finding Our Feet We loosely used strategies that we read about online with J before we got the official diagnosis, as we were just finding our feet with it all. Once we had the diagnosis, we really did try and implement everything we could to help her, and us, maintain some sort of life. All of the traditional parenting techniques and books I had at home got thrown out of the window (not literally, although I was tempted!!!) and in came books like My Daughter is Not Naughty and The Explosive Child. Well worth a read if you havent already. It was all such a different way of parenting that we found it really hard to get our heads around. Still do to some extent, but knowledge is power and we are certainly gaining that along the way! In came strategies like giving choices to start with (but not too many!), to give J some feeling that she was in control, even though the eventual outcome was what we actually wanted in the first place, if that makes sense? I think it all started with brushing teeth. J struggled with this massively until we read somewhere about buying two different coloured brushes, and offering her the choice. This, I have to say, had an instant beneficial effect!! We even made it a bit of a game trying to guess which colour she was going to pick. It worked a treat, and did for a long time, until she deicided she wanted to try an electric toothbrush. We were a bit unsure to start with, but she absolutely loves it, especially the sensory sensation in her mouth. Bonus! We didnt have to buy two, thankfully!! We just have the one and although brushing them in the mornings is sometimes a bit hit and miss, she is happy to brush them before bed. Cleanliness I think next came the problem with showering or taking a bath. There was always such a faff around this and sometimes you could actually feel her anxiety filling the room! So, we took it back to basics in the beginning and took away the demand completely. So, she didnt wash for a bit, it was no biggie (well it was a bit, but we tried not to show it ). Eventually J took it upon herself to ask if she could have a quick shower. It was almost like it needed to come from her, in her own time. Although nowadays we do make the suggestion as to having a bath/shower throughout the week, there really is no pressure, and sometimes she has even been known to have a quick shower well after it should be bedtime! Timing is of no consequence sometimes. Bedtime Talking of bedtime, once again all demands have been stripped back. When I think back to the real problems we used to have around bedtime it actually makes me cringe. Unbeknown to us, pre-diagnosis, the huge amount of pressure we used to place on her to be in bed by a certain time was massive. And then we would wonder why she continually got up and trundled downstairs, creating havoc. There is still a bedtime routine, of sorts, but it is by no means set in stone! Its extremely fluid to say the least. As much as we would like her to be in bed by 8 and asleep by 8.30 (ish!), its just not going to happen. Bedtime is around 9pm and quiet time till 9.30, by which time she is generally yawning her head off ready for the land of nod. And if 9pm doesnt work, then it just gets pushed back. At the end of the day we cant make her fall asleep. She is tired when she is tired. Screens!! Thinking about bedtime, we used to have massive limitations around screen time too. Ahhh screen time.... Gone are the days when playing online was limited to an hour a day, two hours at a weekend WTF???!!! I actually had a chart pinned up in the kitchen with house rules saying no this, no that. Needless to say that ceased a long long time ago. So, back to screen time. J is on the xbox.... a lot. In fact more than a lot. But we get it now. We understand. It is her safe place. It is where she can self regulate, share her special interest (Minecraft), be creative, converse with friends by text or chat and basically it is just her passion. A huge passion. She lives and breathes it and she is very good at it. If someone started limiting my passion to being only able to access it for an hour or so a day, I would feel pretty annoyed. Yes, I know she is a child, yes I know some believe screen time is harmful, especially before bed, etc, and there will be people who totally disagree with what I am saying. In fact, I used to be one of those people that when out for a meal with my husband, we would spot another family with a child focused intently on their tablet, and no talking seemed to take place at all, between any of them. We used to say, we wont let our daughter sit at the table to eat with her eyes glued to the tablet, or why are they not bothering to talk to their child?. We seriously used to say that and it makes me cringe. More often than not these kids were quite possibly on the spectrum, and the only way they could cope with being out, with all the sensory processing going on, was to become fixated on their screens to block it all out. And why not?! Clothes So, onto clothes. I used to pick out Js outfits, and she would wear them, but as time has gone on, she likes to select her own clothes, which is fine with me. She has some lovely girly clothes in her wardrobe, but leggings and t-shirt seems to be what she feels most comfortable in. Back along when we had the extremely hot weather, she still wore leggings, even though she had shorts, but in her own words I hate my legs. Now, there is nothing wrong with her legs at all, except for the usual scrapes and bruises, but for some reason she just wants them covered all the time. I havent really pushed this, again it is her choice. Hair Due to sensory processing J struggles with her hair too and often wont brush it for days. It probably gets washed once a week, if I am lucky. She hates having it up. Again in the hot weather I suggested putting it up, but she just says she doesnt like it. She has beautiful hair, which thankfully even though not really looked after all that well, has stayed in pretty good condition. I would love to be able to do more with it for her, but I just have to accept that she doesnt want to and I need to be ok with that, afterall she is her own person, and is growing up very quickly... too quickly! Expectations Before I finish this topic I really want to cover the expectation to say thank you, from a PDA perspective. Around Christmas time and birthdays and the tradition of giving and receiving presents, if the gifts were from anyone else bar us, she would either appear not to want to open them in front of the person, or would reluctantly open said gift, but struggle to know what to say, and either look away, slightly embaressed or would run off, pretending to do something else. I remember a while back, again pre-understanding, of saying to J, what do you say? after a gift had been opened. Just imagine how much of a demand that was to her. I cringe now, but I used to say it a lot, along with making sure she always said her pleases and thank yous. Now I dont say anything, it is all left to her, and people just have to understand. Sometimes she will message the person after to say thank you, and sometimes not. But I know deep down this is not a form of arrogance, it is a case of cant rather than wont. As soon as you get your head around that saying, everything becomes so much clearer. Print the quote out and stick it on your fridge, it really is a great reminder! Remember ... One thing I always try and keep in mind, is that J is not doing anything out of spite. With a diagnosis of PDA she will switch from passive to aggressive very quickly, but then again you probably already know that and experience the swiftness of change with your child too. Flexibility Novelty and variety can work extremely well if used alongside flexibility and adaptability. Role play can often disguise a demand, but if your child is anything like J, who is pretty switched on and savvy, they wont fall for it and you will be trying to constantly change your approach to fit the current situation. Its bloody hard going! And as we all know, what works one day, will not necessarily work the next, and it can be extremely hard to keep up. It comes down to the fact that your approach to your child and his/her needs really does need to be highly individualised, as undirect as possible and low key. Remember, your PDA child can pick up on your emotions very easily. Dont let your face or your actions give anything away. Even your tone of voice can cause huge anxiety. You have to be in for the long road. PDA is a lifelong condition, it is not something that will eventually go away and your child wont grow out of it. But it can be helped if you do your research, find your tribe who are going through the same and just forget every traditional method of parenting you have ever come across. I will end with this. In Js case, PDA is not going to stop her doing anything that she sets her heart on. She is extremely motivated, creative, kind, funny and loving. With the right people around her throughout her life and the correct understanding, I am sure she will be just fine! In fact I am more than sure, I am certain!!
24.01.2022 Many Autistic/Neurodivergent people face executive functioning challenges. Understanding and meaningful support are key. For a deeper dive, please see the follo...wing resources: From Amythest Schaber, "Ask an Autistic #25 - What is Executive Functioning?" (youtu.be/229Xb50_o8M) From Cynthia Kim of Musings Of An Aspie, "Executive Functioning Series" (musingsofanaspie.com/executive-function-series) From the team at Understood, "What Is Executive Function?" (tinyurl.com/y4rskflt) and "A Day In The Life Of A Child With Executive Functioning Issues" (tinyurl.com/qkg862w) Image credit: Pathway 2 Success
24.01.2022 It is all about control! Because the world is frequently confusing and overwhelming for those autistics with severe anxiety and/or Pathological Demand Avoidance... (PDA), their brains are often in a reactive, defensive mode. When the brain is in the defensive mode, it has one thing on its mind, safety. It feels threatened, and all uncertainty represents a threat to its safety. Safety takes priority over learning. Until the brain feels safe, it is not in a state of readiness for learning. When the brain feels threatened, it sets off hormonal changes that heighten the senses, increases the adrenaline, and puts all systems on high alert for possible fight or flight action. Research also shows that for the neuro-typical brain, once the threat is over, our systems rebound quickly, and we fall back to a calm state until the next perceived threat occurs. However, for many on the spectrum, this rebound takes much longer, and the brain stays hyper-alert for the extended future. Even in the relaxed state, the stress chemicals for people with autism are still much higher. Children with high anxiety and rigid, inflexible thinking are most often working in the reactive, defensive mode. When in this state, the brain seeks to control all that is around it to make the world more understandable and predictable, lessening the threat and lowering the anxiety. The child will try to control all interactions and activities to feel safe and will often actively resist following the lead of others because of the threat of uncertainty. If the anxiety is high, the child will be actively oppositional and resist all forces that we apply. We must recognize that the need for control is required for the brain to protect itself, and this is not the willful intent of the child. Increased pressure to comply will be met with extreme resistance and violence if need be. The child simply has no choice. As parents, teachers, caregivers, and professionals, we need to recognize this need for control as being an innate part of the childs brain functioning (wiring) and realize that the childs need to control is the only coping skill that he has available. It is not a bad thing, but a coping skill for feeling safe, both physically and emotionally. Unfortunately, we often meet resistance with increased pressure to comply. This command and demand mode will rarely work and only fuel the flames and make the brain more reactive. This is a natural neurological response from the brain, not willful intent by the child. We cannot force the brain into more uncertainty and insecurity. It is hard-wired to revert to control or explode. What does this mean for us? First, we need to recognize that when in a defensive mode, the brain seeks avoidance of anything it is not controlling. Therefore, we must not take this need to control as a power struggle with us but recognize it as a survival technique to feel safe and secure. Once we can recognize this, it should lower our anger and frustration because it is no longer perceived as a power struggle. Second, we need to give the child as much control as possible, so the brain feels safe. We need to meet rigidity with flexibility. Recognize that we need to initially make sure the child feels safe before attempting to teach. Meet the child where he or she is at and collaboratively work together, allowing the child to lead while you safely guide. By doing so, the child views you as a working partner with them and better trusts following your guidance. Again, let them lead with your guidance. The child will not initially trust your guidance and will resist. This is because they are used to people pushing and pressuring them into uncertainty. They do not trust your guidance. This is not a personal attack on you and do not see it as a power struggle. Remember, we must focus on safety first before teaching. When you see the defensive reaction, most likely, the child is not feeling safe and is going to react with opposition to control. Allow the child to pace himself and follow his lead at first. If too over-reactive, back off, regroup, and respect the brains sense of insecurity. Proceed cautiously while gauging the childs sense of safety. By doing so, the child will begin to trust that you will not push or pressure him into a panic. This respect will teach the child that they can trust following your lead. Allowing the child to lead and knowing when to stretch is a balancing act that will vary from day to day and hour to hour based on the childs current level of anxiety. On days when the anxiety is high, we need to back off as much as possible, not pressure, and allow the brain to feel safe. On days of less anxiety, we can stretch a little further without overwhelming the brain. Over time the brain will be less defensive and reactive, and the child will gradually start to trust following your lead. This article was published in the brown book, The Autism Discussion Page on stress, anxiety, shutdowns and meltdowns https://www.amazon.com/Autism-Discussion-Anxi//ref=sr_1_3
23.01.2022 Physical Activity and Stress Management Unfortunately, over the years, schools in America have reduced the available time they give for physical activity during... the day. In favor of more time spent on academics, schools have reduced the child's time engaged in structured physical activity (gym, recess, etc.). Especially in the early years, teachers need to start the school day with at least ten to twenty minutes of physical activity that provides movement and physical exertion, and then provide another ten to twenty minutes of physical activity mid-day. Combining vestibular movement (running, jumping, etc.) with proprioception (pushing, pulling) alerts and organizes the nervous system for concentrating and learning. Healthy movement alerts the nervous system and increases focus, while exertion organizes the nervous system (both releases stress chemicals and organizing neurotransmitters) by enhancing Serotonin. Physical activity is a win-win alternative for calming the hyperactive child and arousing the sluggish child. Also, physical activity is a great coping skill for reducing anxiety and dealing with stress. Physical activity release stress chemicals from the nervous and better organize the neuro-chemistry. It is a great coping skill for both children and adults who experience ongoing anxiety or depression on or off the spectrum. Exercise reduces anxiety and enhances mood the higher the anxiety, the more critical the physical exercise. The two ten to minutes sessions of vigorous exercise are essential for both children and adults and should be emphasized and established early in life. Many children on the spectrum have poor muscle tone, coordination, and motor planning. Some avoid physical activity with a passion. They need to be encouraged to get up and move. It will increase their muscle tone, coordination, and self-esteem, as well as lower their anxiety and alert their nervous system. Children on the spectrum, like many of us, are creatures of habit. They need physical activity to build into their daily routine, consistently implemented each day. Do it with them, turn it into a fun sharing activity, and model the value of being active. You will see a calmer, more alert child, as well as the same for yourself. Physical activity is one of the best and least expensive therapeutic tools you can use. Unfortunately, it is not used enough. This series on stress and anxiety can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies.
22.01.2022 Never sacrifice yourself for others.
21.01.2022 Teaching Independence: Monitoring Performance! One of the weak areas of executive functioning skills for people on the spectrum is monitoring their performan...ce as they are doing it. They tend to do without monitoring how well they are doing it. Consequently, they often do things too fast, not complete enough, forget steps, or do a sloppy job of it. They concretely learn how to do things but do not learn how to monitor how they are doing and check their performance once completed. It is important to teach children on the spectrum self-monitoring skills. To self-monitor how they are doing requires multi-tasking, monitoring how they are doing, while they are doing. This is difficult for children on the spectrum. To monitor how you are doing, you have to have a mental image of what adequate performance is and what the finished product should look like. When we are working on something, we keep a mental image of what the final product should look like and monitor our performance to match that. So, once we learn how to do something, we also have to learn how to monitor our performance to meet expectations (good enough). There are two concrete tools you can use to help this process out. One is to provide a visual model (picture, or real object) of the finished product or the task's sequential steps (how each step will look when finished). Children on the spectrum have weak working memories, which allows us to hold a mental image of the final product in our short term memory. By providing them a concrete image (picture or model), they can continually reference this model to match their performance to it. The same is for multiple-step tasks. If they have a picture or model, they can match their performance to these visuals of each step. The second tool is to use a check-off list to check if any steps are missed. You can either use a check-off list for each step as they go and/or a completed checklist to check the final product when done to ensure they did not miss anything. Effective monitoring often combines a visual image (model) of the final product with a written checklist to verify that each step was completed and matches what is expected. For example, many kids on the spectrum learn to dress themselves, but they often do not check themselves at the end of the task to make sure that they are neatly dressed (shirt buttoned correctly, shirt tucked in, collar arranged, zipper zipped, etc.) We often teach them a skill, but not the last step of evaluating their own performance to make sure it is done correctly. Many children on the spectrum are not concerned about dress or appearance since many do not understand that others judge them on their appearance. Whether it be basic grooming, dressing, etc. it is important for them to learn self-monitoring skills. This becomes so important when they become adults and try to enter the workforce. Hygiene and dress are one of the first major issues that can get the person fired. So, start teaching the importance of personal care early and refine it as they age. As an example, sloppy appearance is often a problem for people on the spectrum. Teachers or employers often list dressing and personal hygiene as ongoing issues. While dressing, many children on the spectrum do not self-monitor how they are doing. They simply put clothes on without referencing to see if they did it right. They get dressed and have no clue that things are not right. Neurotypical (NT) people tend to monitor themselves as they go and continually check the accuracy of their actions. Kids on the spectrum often do not "check" their actions. One way of teaching this is to have the child dress in front of a mirror (a full-length mirror is even better). This way, they can watch themselves doing it and monitor how it looks. On one side of the mirror, place a sequential checklist of the steps for dressing. This way, the child can reference the list (or picture sequence) for each dressing step. On the other side of the mirror, place a photo of the child neatly dressed. As the child puts on each item, he can reference himself in the mirror and adjust the clothes as needed. At first, the parent may need to stand there with him and cue him to reference the picture to match how he looks in the mirror. He may need help seeing what is done incorrectly, what needs adjusting, and how to fix it. For younger children, they may also need a picture routine chart to show the sequence of putting on the clothes. Once each item is placed on correctly, you describe what is right about it, making visual reference to it in the mirror and matching the picture. When he finishes all steps of dressing, the last step should be to look in the mirror and visually check his appearance, matching it to the picture (model). If there are certain things that he misses frequently, then write out a simple checklist (shirt tucked in, zipper zipped, etc.) At first, it is best for you to do the check with him, standing in front of the mirror, and go through the checklist. Let him check himself, and realize when he has missed something. You eventually want him to be self-reflective, evaluating his own performance. Over time as the task becomes automatic with the last step being checking his overall appearance, the use of the visual strategies can be removed. This series on Executive Functioning can be found in the blue book, Autism Discussion Page on the Core Challenges of Autism. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
20.01.2022 A timeless message from the late Maya Angelou: "If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be."
18.01.2022 "Its important to talk about autism in a positive way, not to deny the difficulties, but to open a way forward so those difficulties can become less so. A posi...tive outlook enthuses, creates, restores and breeds hope." What a privilege to have Dr. Wenn Lawson as part of our I CAN family! For a deeper dive from our I CAN team, please see: Nurturing Self-Esteem & Pride In Autistic Young People (tinyurl.com/y3dbvuow) Important Resources & Reminders for Our Younger Autistic Peers (tinyurl.com/y2ktwmy6) Respectful Resources About Autism: Some of Our Favourites (www.facebook.com/pg/theicannetwork/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1466908953494310)
17.01.2022 Problems in the community For many families who have children on the spectrum, they frequently feel like prisoners in their own homes. Because their children a...re often overwhelmed and act out in public, they are confined to the safety of their homes. However, for children to grow and develop, they need exposure to be part of the community. At the same time, we need to frame these outings to maximize success for both pleasure and learning. Like all exposure to novelty, we need very structured boundaries, build in supports, add guided participation, and maximize the success of the outing. Instead of saying "no," they cannot do this, we need to say how. What are the barriers, and what supports are needed to lessen these barriers? Listed below are potential challenges and possible strategies to support them. 1. Sensory: If your child has sensory issues and becomes overloaded easily, then add in ways to lessen, filter, or distract for auditory and visual stimulation. Knowing your childs sensory challenges keep a sensory toolbox in the car to accommodate these sensory challenges. Often having the child wear earplugs or use an iPod to mask noise, wear sunglasses to dim bright lights, sit in enclosed booths, or with back to the crowd to minimize visual stimulation, and bring fidget toys and other items to distract, can greatly reduce stress for the child. 2. Spatial concerns: Try to consider the physical arrangement to maximize success. How much space does your child need? Does the child need to sit between two adults or between adult and inside of the booth, sit away from items of temptations, or close to the door or bathroom if a quick exit may be needed? 3. Waiting is always an issue: Standing in line, waiting long for food, and waiting for others to finish eating are often issues. Do not simply expect the child to wait patiently. Bring fidget toys and simple activities (e.g., electronic devices) to distract and occupy the time. Also, try shortening the time by calling in advance, waiting to take the child in the restaurant until the group is seated, taking the child outside to play after finished eating, and discussing the menu in advance, so the child knows what to order. 4. "Clarify and Verify." Uncertainty is the childs worse enemy! Dont assume the child knows what is occurring and what is expected. Discuss each step of the activity, what will happen, the order of events, and what is expected of him just before going in. Clarify concretely what is happening and, if possible, verify that the child understands. Visual supports are often good for this. Use a Velcro board or picture story to visually sequence out the order of events (waiting in line, sitting down, ordering, eating, paying, leaving, etc.) 5. "Preview and Review": If you go to the same places a lot, make picture stories to prepare the child. Take a digital camera and take several pictures of the child going through the steps in the setting. On the computer, make a picture story by placing four pictures in sequence, with a note under each picture to tell the story. Before going on the event, use the picture story to preview what is expected, and if necessary, take it along to go along. The picture page can also be used to review between trips. I like using a "me" picture book for several such events. 6. Sense of control. Many children can bridge the uncertainty if they are actively a part of the process (planning the outing, taking orders for family, paying at the end, etc.). Best way to tackle uncertainty is to have some control over it. 7. For children who get overwhelmed, discuss with them before going into an event, what to do if they start to become overwhelmed. Many children will freak when they start to get overwhelmed. They dont know what to do or how to escape the situation. This sets off panic, and they act out, then get furious when told that they must leave. This often can be anticipated ahead of time. Discuss what problems might occur in the setting, what supports you can provide when this occurs, and how the child should handle it when overload happens. For example, if you discuss the need to pull back, leave briefly, rebound and return when the child starts to get overwhelmed, then the child will be more likely to follow that plan once this situation arises. Since you discuss it as proactive support, the child feels more competent in using it once the situation arises. I also find that the childs anxiety, as well as that of all family members, lessens when they have a plan worked out ahead of time. With less initial anxiety, there is less likelihood of a meltdown. Also, once overload starts to occur, the child understands that by pulling back to regroup, it doesnt mean ending the activity altogether. 8. Reaction Strategies: Even with all supports built-in, unanticipated problems will still arise. Always have a reaction plan set up for immediately dealing with behavior challenges when they occur. I have found that the public is more annoyed with families that "do not quickly intervene and block, redirect, or otherwise diffuse the situation." Part of being proactive is to brainstorm what you are going to do "if" these behaviors occur. For most children setting boundaries and intervening very early in the episode is more successful. 9. Graded exposure: Start simple, build gradually, and maximize success!! For some of my very challenging clients, we start with making a hierarchy of "least to most" challenging events. For example, we may start by going into a restaurant at a very slow time of the day and gradually work our way up to busier times. Or, we may start by going in and just buying a quick snack to make it a short trip and give child familiarity to the event. Gradual exposure can build a strong sense of safety and competency. Like any new learning, it can be successful; just takes time, effort, and patience from parents and the public. When using gradual exposure, we usually make three lists: a list of events that rarely present problems, a list of events that sometimes present problems, and a list of events that usually represent major problems. From that list, we isolate out factors that make that event difficult, and those that make the events more successful. By doing so, we can make a hierarchy of events from least to most challenging and start with frequent, but brief, outings in the least anxiety-provoking settings to maximize success and teach the families the supports. They learn to preview and review ahead of time, have a plan for when times get rough, and implement that plan under easy conditions. Once everyone feels more competent in implementing the supports, then we gradually stretch the outings up the hierarchy, as long as they remain successful. By doing so, everyone feels more relaxed and confident that they can handle the situations that may arise. Going out in the community can cause significant stress for both the child and the family. However, integrating with others and inclusion in the community is the ultimate goal for all of us. This series on challenging behavior can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
17.01.2022 INSIGHTS FOR TEACHERS FROM AN AUTISTIC PANEL As part of our #AwetismExpo on 20th November, we are so proud to offer a free, online professional development ses...sion for teachers from 3:30-4:30pm AEDT (including live Q&A). Hosted by I CAN Founder/CEO Chris Varney, this panel will feature: I CAN Mentor Lana Wheatfill, who will reflect upon her experiences navigating high school as an Autistic student and the insights she's gleaned as both an I CAN mentee and mentor Dr Emma Goodall, an Autistic Autism researcher, author, consultant and education professional who has taught and consulted across a wide range of educational settings around the world on both education and disability policy in Australia and New Zealand Kate Andrews, who will bring her rich perspectives as a teacher, parent & leader of our I CAN team in the Goulburn Murray region. Anyone who registers for our Expo has the option of taking part on the actual day and/or enjoying access to all of the taped Expo content through 20th December. We have events from 9:00am until 8:00pm AEDT that will celebrate Autistic passions and showcase Autistic insights. We hope you will join us! REGISTER HERE: https://awetism.vfairs.com/
16.01.2022 The higher the anxiety the stronger the avoidance When faced with a stressor, the stronger the anxiety the greater the avoidance. Avoidant behavior that results... in escaping the stressor, is directly strengthened by the degree of anxiety it reduces. Over time, through numerous incidents of avoidance reducing anxiety and becoming stronger, even the thought of the stressor (or even mild stressors) will elicit avoidant behavior. The more we press, the more they resist and the stronger the resistance becomes. The avoidant behavior becomes the primary defense mechanism for avoiding any and all uncertainty. When the avoidant behavior works and successfully reduces the anxiety it becomes the go-to response to uncertainty. The objective then starts with eliminating as many demands as possible to avoid numerous opportunities to elicit avoidant behavior. Remember the more resistance we elicit, the stronger the avoidant behavior becomes. We inadvertently create stronger and stronger avoidance. Reduce at least 80% or more of our demands (regardless of how small) will reduce strengthening the avoidant behavior. In turn, creating conditions where the child is successful, will strengthen competence and confidence in approach, rather avoidant behavior. The more competent they feel the less anxious they feel in the face of uncertainty. They also learn not to panic when feeling anxious, reducing the need to avoid.
16.01.2022 Pathological Demand Avoidance, the Confusing Condition Usually, individuals with PDA are very bright, have good ability for pretense (fantasy, imagination), and... have strong verbal skills. On the surface, they may appear not to have a disability. They often seem quite social, with fair eye contact, and can initially mask their weaknesses pretty well. Whereas on the surface, their skills appear well developed, their underlying social skills and ability to read social situations are poor. They often make up elaborate reasons to avoid requests, demands and any expectations (they are sick, too smart for something that stupid, will do it later, redirect peoples attention elsewhere, etc.) They even find it hard to meet their own desires and expectations. Eventually withdrawing into a defensive mode of avoiding all meaning life activities that parents and others try to coax or demand them into doing. Unfortunately, most adults (parents, teachers, professionals) view them as defiant, manipulative, and purposely oppositional, which only fuels their need to command and demand even more. Anyone that is that bright and (on the surface) capable, their opposition cannot be due to a disability. Unfortunately, underneath that strong social faade and pretense is a person who feels very inadequate, scared, and insecure. The anxiety and fear control every aspect of their daily life. The need to control everything, following nothing, and avoid all daily demands is driven by this anxiety and strong feelings of inferiority. Life is too scary and overwhelming that they often mix reality with fantasy to create a world that they feel safe and competent. This usually means refusing to follow anyone elses guidance, since to do so leaves them vulnerable to uncertainty and increased anxiety. This is not just common anxiety, but a deep-rooted fear. You cannot win the command and demand battle with PDA kids. They become more resistant and sophisticated in their avoidance, sabotage everything that looks like external control, even refuse to do what they like if others are requesting it. Pressure only pushes them further into being defiant and not trusting the guidance of others. Only by backing off the demands, letting them control and trust that you will let them, and gradually building a collaborated relationship with them, can you lessen the anxiety and build more trust in your guidance. All of the strategies represented in the several posts before this one. Children with PDA are the most complex and vulnerable children to help. They resist almost every parenting, teaching, and disciplinary techniques common to children. The harder you try to help (by instructing, directing, prompting, etc.), the more they resist, the more they act out, and the further away they become from feeling safe with others. Very frustrating and heartbreaking for parents and teachers. When you try to reverse your strategies to a low-demand, collaborative, working partnership model, you are chastised by other parents, family, teachers, and professionals. This disability is still very new and not well recognized in the field. I recommend that parents join some of the PDA networks online so they can communicate with other families traveling the same journey. You need the support and guidance that they can provide. For those who are members of these groups, please post here the links to the websites. I do not have them available. Just remember, The more resistant the child is, the more scared and inadequate they feel! Anxiety and fear of uncertainty rule every action in their lives. Most importantly, if you feel your loved one is PDA, explore these websites, talk with others, and then present this to clinicians for assistance.
15.01.2022 RESPECTFUL RESOURCES FOR FAMILIES OF NEWLY DIAGNOSED AUTISTIC CHILDREN "I often think about how much better our world would be if every newly diagnosed child an...d their family were completely surrounded by encouragement, hopeful messages and the wisdom of Autistic voices right from the very start." ~ Kristy, Proud Mum of Lijy * Kristy & Lijys I CAN story: www.icannetwork.com.au/2019/04/lijy * "How My Unstoppable Mother Proved The Experts Wrong", I CAN Founder/CEO Chris Varneys 2013 TEDx talk: (video - youtu.be/T1HQKB2txgY) * "The Parenting Spectrum", a beautiful ABC podcast series from Travis, Fiona & Patch (School of the Road) that features many Autistic voices, including those from our I CAN team (www.abc.net.au/radio/programs/the-parenting-spectrum) * From Autistic teen Quincy Hansen (Speaking of Autism - Quincy Hansen), "To The Parents of a Newly Diagnosed Autistic Child" (tinyurl.com/yy9f4jky) * From Ariane Zurcher of Emmas Hope Book , "What I Wish Id Been Made Aware of When My Daughter Was Diagnosed With Autism" (tinyurl.com/hkv9tfe)
15.01.2022 Anxiety, Opposition and Demand Avoidance Anxiety and rigidity often lead to a host of behavior challenges usually clustered under labels such as resistant, oppo...sitional, defiant, manipulative, aggressive, and destructive. To these children, the chaotic and confusing world, with all its ambiguity and inconsistencies, leads to chronic anxiety. These children do not have good mental maps for navigating our social world, thus are left guessing at what is expected. They are constantly pressured into situations where they cannot read the expectations and left guessing at what is needed. Unfortunately, when you are left guessing at what is expected, you often guess wrong. Anxiety for these children can range from mild to severely debilitating. Their coping skills for handling the anxiety also can vary significantly. However, most will show a variety of resistant behaviors to escape and avoid the conditions that lead to their uncertainty. Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) There is a movement in Europe to recognize a small subset of autism that is extremely resistant to any daily demands as well as following the lead of others. Their anxiety is so severe that they are apprehensive in all daily activities and must control everything happening to them and around them. This behavior profile within the autism spectrum has been labeled Pathological Demand Avoidance. These children are usually bright, very social (but lack good relating skills), creative, good at role-playing and pretending, and good at manipulating out of daily demands and expectations. Although PDA is not yet an official diagnosis, it is steadily gaining acceptance and hopefully will be included as a subset under the Autism Spectrum Disorders. It is not the intent of this book to provide a comprehensive description of PDA, but readers can easily find current books and websites devoted to this profile by googling Pathological Demand Avoidance. Also, not all autistic children with severe avoidance and anxiety have PDA (due to other defining symptoms), but the suggestions below, based on my experience, should apply to any autistic child with severe anxiety and avoidance. For children with severe avoidance, their anxiety overwhelms every aspect of their day. Their world must be just right, entirely predictable, and totally under their control to feel safe and competent. Fear of uncertainty and strong feelings of inadequacy render them constantly anxious, insecure, and resistant to all influences of others. They need to control everything around them to keep it predictable and according to their expectations. For most of us, the childrens behavior can seem so unpredictable. You can be offering the child something that they like or a preferred event and still get strong resistance, demanding, and aggressive behavior. No matter what you try, it doesnt work; even when allowed to lead and control, they still might meltdown at the least little snag. Why? Why would the child meltdown when they are given what they want or allowed to do what they desire? Listed below are the seven most common reasons. 1. Fear of uncertainty. These children need to know exactly what to expect and what is expected of them. Preview events ahead of time to provide a mental map of what is going to happen, how long it is going to be, and what is expected of them, especially if it is a new, unfamiliar event. The more novel, unfamiliar, or vague the event is, the more anxiety and chances of melting down. However, this can be a double edge sword. If you preview too far in advance, they will often ruminate and become increasing anxious over the expectations. Best to do it just before the events to lessen the uncertainty, but avoid the anticipatory anxiety. 2. Unexpected events. The childs security is based on the understanding and predictability of their immediate world. What is occurring around them must match their expectations. Unexpected changes collapse their sense of safety and security. Even if what you present is something that they desire, if they were not expecting it and were not mentally prepared for it, their fragile security falls apart. This can happen if there is a snag in what is expected, something is postponed or delayed or if there is a small variation to a familiar activity. When the course of events does not occur as expected, the whole picture collapses. This can happen even in events that seem to be going along just as expected. However, if some small part is different and not according to expectation, the child can immediately react as if the whole event has fallen apart. 3. Need to control. The child fears uncertainty and needs to control everything to make it predictable and safe. They do not trust following the lead of the adult and resists any attempt from us to direct, instruct, or lead them. Even if the event is something they like and is previewed adequately, if they are being directed by someone else, they will get anxious. So, when the child is resistant, first look to see how much control you are exerting over the activity. Ask yourself, if you are the child, would you feel in control of what is happening? This is very hard for adults because we want to be in control and lead. We want to guide, direct, and instruct. But the more we try, the more resistant the child becomes. 4. Must initiate the event. These children often show an immediate negative reaction to anything initiated by others. Even if the children can pace and lead the activity, if they do not initiate it, they will still feel anxious. If it wasnt their idea and initiated by them, they may still resist. This resistance will occur even if what you are requesting is something the child likes. When initiated by someone else, it is not safe. 5. Performance anxiety. You do everything above, let the child do what they want, let them lead, preview expectations ahead of time, and let them dictate every element of the event, and the child still freaks!! Why? These children have strong task performance anxiety. It makes sense that when we place an expectation on them, they feel strong performance anxiety and feel put on the spot. So, we place minimal demands and let them control, and they still get upset! What gives? Whether the expectation is placed by others or themselves, it still represents performance anxiety. If their performance is not going as planned and matches their expectation, they will become highly anxious and lose control. Usually, they have a very strong fear of failure and perfectionism. When a little slip-up occurs, they fall apart. Making things worse, these children are often very poor in appraising what is needed and how to monitor their performance. They often jump in with the feeling they can do it and, at the first snag or problem, fall apart, blame others, become demanding, and sabotage the much-desired event. Feeling inadequate and failure sets them up for increased anxiety the next time. 6. Strong social anxiety. The more people the child must regulate during the event, the greater the anxiety. Problems reading the nonverbal communication of others, understanding the intentions and perspectives of others, reading the invisible social rules of the situations, and understanding what others expect makes interacting very unpredictable and stressful. This is hard enough when they are just relating to one person but greatly falls apart if it is a group event. Birthday parties, holiday get-togethers, and other group activities can be a disaster. Too much uncertainty, vague expectations, and unpredictable actions, and the child becomes overwhelmed. 7. Sensory overload. Since many of these children have sensory sensitivities and problems integrating multiple sensations, the greater the sensory stimulation (noise, sights, smells, movement, and activity), the more overwhelmed they become. The more involved the activity (people, activity, expectations), the more sensory integration is required. Simply too much coming in too fast. Also, the more anxious the child becomes, the more sensitive he is to the stimulation around him. What happens for the child? If any of these seven elements are present, anxiety will increase. The more variables that occur, the greater the anxiety. If something occurs unexpectedly, the child does not know how to respond, what to say, or what to do. If the child cannot control everything and direct exactly what is going on, then the uncertainty becomes frightening and overwhelming. The adults may try making everything as desirable as possible for the child, but they cannot control all these variables. The child is consistently inconsistent. They may do fine one time and complete meltdown the next. They may appear to be having fun and instantly fall apart. They may be enjoying your company one minute and kicking and hitting you the next. Our anxiety and emotions escalate, and so does theirs. Much is the life for the ASD child with severe anxiety and Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). They are the most fragile and vulnerable children. They are also the most frustrating for parents and teachers to support. Every typical parenting and teaching strategy falls apart. Every single person around the child, as well as the child himself, feels entirely inadequate. The intent here is to outline some of the rigid comfort zones (need for predictability, control, perfect performance, and minimal social regulation) that come into play in each daily activity for the child. In analyzing each negative outcome, we must look at these seven variables and appraise which ones created the problems and design strategies for helping to lessen their impact. We must then learn to appraise events ahead of time to see how each of these seven variables will come into play and how we will accommodate for them. The more we understand the comfort zones of the child and what variables shake these comfort zones, the more we understand why the child is resisting and how we can support him. Just remember, when the tide turns, and the child is falling apart, his world is crumbling, he is becoming overwhelmed and immediately panics. The more resistant the child, the more scared and inadequate the child feels. A tidal wave of emotions overwhelms the thinking part of their brain, and all hell breaks loose. The children are trying to cope as best as they can. Think for one minute. If your sense of safety and security were so fragile and dependent on these seven variables being predictable, every daily activity would be frightening. Be patient with both the child and you. These are very difficult challenges that test the best of all of us. This article was published in the brown book, The Autism Discussion Page on stress, anxiety, shutdowns, and meltdowns. https://www.amazon.com/Autism-Discussion-Anxi//ref=sr_1_3
15.01.2022 The Autism Spectrum is not linear. Learn more: From Autistic artist Rebecca Burgess, "Understanding The Spectrum: A Comic Strip Explanation" (tinyurl.com/ycqu...oqur) From Autistic uni student Lucy Wallace, "Autism, The Spectrum" (tinyurl.com/y3psz9p4) h/t More Than One Neurotype
14.01.2022 Autistic children need Autistic adult role models. They need Autistic adults who are "out and proud" about their Autism. Thank you to our friends at Reframing... Autism for this beautiful and important message. For insights and resource recommendations from our Autistic I CAN mentors, please see: Nurturing Self-Esteem & Pride in Autistic Young People (www.icannetwork.com.au//nurturing-self-esteem-pride-in-au/) Important Reminders & Resources for Our Younger Autistic Peers (www.icannetwork.com.au//important-reminders-resour/mentors)
13.01.2022 Turning deficits into assets! Rigid inflexibility expressed as commitment and dedication! Many "differences" for which we often call deficits, often can be true... benefits. Many people on the spectrum tend to have "all or nothing" thinking, for which is frequently labeled as rigid, inflexible thinking. This is often thought of in negative terms because it frequently leads to difficulty in times when flexible thinking is required. Their thinking is often very "black and white," "either/or" or "right or wrong." This type of thinking can also be an asset at times. When the person on the spectrum likes something or is committed to something, he will go all out and hyper-focus on it. He will commit full heartedly to whatever his passion or endeavor is. Therefore, he can excel in a preferred vocational interest or favorite activity. He will be very disciplined in practicing and persevere in the face of adversity. This "all or nothing" thinking can be very favorable when funneled in the right way. The same is true for friendships. Even though relating can be difficult for them, most people on the spectrum, once they befriend you, will be one of the most dedicated friends you will ever have. They will support you, help you out, and stand by you when things are not going well. If they are going to be your friend, they will be a "good" friend. If they like something, they "really" like something. They dont go halfway. Most of the so-called "deficits" in autism are simply "differences. They can be viewed in a negative light (since they are not like ours), but can also be viewed in a positive light (strengths that we do not have). This is not to minimize the challenges that autism presents to both the person himself and others. Yes, there are many struggles but do get stuck in automatically interpreting all differences as deficits. Do not stifle the unique qualities that autism can present. This series on Strengths and interests can be found in the green book. Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School, and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
13.01.2022 Frustration during video games Videos games can be very addicting, changing the neurochemistry in the brain. This can be for any person, on the spectrum or not..., especially if there is any ADD involved. People with under-aroused nervous systems and attention deficit problems need excitability to focus. Video games provide "excitation" both at the visual, sensory level, and at the cognitive (challenge) level. Kids on the spectrum, since they struggle to regulate in the real world (especially relating with others), enjoy living in a fantasy world, which brings them a sense of control and competence. They can control what happens and build strong excitability. Then as it gets harder and they begin to fail, it takes them from an immediate high to an immediate low. Their brains cannot switch gears that quick. "Mastery" is rewarding for every living being. Unfortunately, children on the spectrum often only experience mastery when they are focusing on their fixated interest or playing a video game. They start the video games at the easier steps, gradually building confidence as they work up the steps. This mastery builds greater and greater excitement, and then suddenly, they fail! What a letdown. Adding fuel to the fire, children with autism have trouble shifting gears and ending something very exciting for them. Once into it, it is difficult for them to pull themselves away from the excitement. They get hyper-focused on the game and do not want to pull away. On the one hand, the sensory excitability, feelings of mastery and competence, and the ability to control what is happening are all very attractive to the child with autism. They can withdraw from the real world and enter a world where they can feel more competent. Now adding fuel to the fire, children with autism are also "all or nothing" and see failure as catastrophic. They have a difficult time with "good enough" thinking and see all failure as devastating. Since many already have problems with regulating emotions, video games set them up for problems. Now, given all these issues that video games can bring, it is good to limit the amount of time children on the spectrum spend with video games. You need to put very clear boundaries, rules, and expectations on their use. However, you may need to do this gradually. If your child is used to playing hours at a time, and you take it away for a week, expect to have withdrawal effects. Most children on the spectrum cannot handle this. Gradually cut back on how long they can play it, and how often during the day. Build in other activities they must do first, before playing the video games. It is important to teach children structure and routine, so get your child used to a routine filled with constructive activity, with video games built in periodically. Also, video games can be used to reinforce completing less preferred activities. First, you do this, and then you can play games! So, build in approximately 90 minutes or more of other activity to earn 30 min. of video time. The two variables I find that affect emotional regulation with video games are the length of time the child can play them before becoming emotionally dysregulated and the complexity of the game that builds greater emotional excitement. Try and keep track of how long the child can play before getting dysregulated, then limit playing time to a safe duration. Use a visual timer and give three and one-minute warnings before ending the play, Don, in three minutes, it will be time to take your bath. This gives the brain a chance to prepare for the transition of stopping and moving on. Johnnie, you can play video games until 8:00, and then you will have your snack. This way, Johnnie knows what is coming up after video games. Make sure to give 5, 3, and one-minute warnings before transitioning to the snack. Johnnie, in five minutes, we will end the video game and have your snack. Also, keep track of which games seem to be less intense (or easier) and which games are harder, thus causing emotional dysregulation. Talk this over with him. When the child throws a fit during one of the harder ones, then for the next session, he must play one of the easier ones. Now, video games also can be used to teach the child how to deal with frustration, learn "good enough" tolerance, and teach emotional regulation. For the more difficult games, try to get the child to talk about what parts are hard and what parts are frustrating for him. Have him explain how he is working the easier parts, and talk about how the game is built around "failing to succeed." You often must fail numerous times before learning how to beat it successfully, and sometimes you may never be able to make through all the steps. Try and get him to realize that is the strategy of the game. Also, realize that as the child moves further and further along the complexity of the game, it will become more emotionally intense, and he will become more drawn into the game. Have him pause at different steps of the game, take a minute break, and then go back to it. His nervous system needs a minute to rebound and collect itself, especially at the harder steps. Teach him to take a few deep breaths and do a few wall push-ups. You want to identify with the child what he should do when he starts getting intense, and then have him practice it at the easier levels while he has better self-control. Then as the intensity builds, he is used to using the coping skill. For the game that is very difficult for the child, tell him he must play it with you to help coach him the rough stages (if you can successfully do it.lol). This is a good time to teach him how to gauge his level of emotional intensity. If he is older, have him grade his emotional level on a gradient of 1-5, with one being calm and five being too intense to handle. Have him pause periodically in the game and rate how he feels. Give him feedback on the level you would rate him at. For older children, have them sense how their bodies feel when upset. Together figure out what he should do at each level to keep his cool (take deep breathes at a low level, get up for a break at higher levels, etc.). Once he allows you to be a working partner with him during these more intense games, coach him along as you see his intensity build. Have him pause briefly between levels to talk about how he feels and to use simple techniques to regroup. Once you identify the higher steps that cause him the frustration, build in concrete rewards for playing those steps while regulating his emotional reactions (win or lose). This way, he sees that the reward comes, not for winning or losing, but controlling his reactions during the step. Let him feel the "mastery" of keeping control when losing. First, talk together on what coping skills to use when frustrated, coach him to use them during the game, and reward him for using them when "sh-- hits the fan! Make the payoff bigger for "keeping his cool" then for winning the game. Make the main goal/objective of the game dealing with losing without acting out!! This changes the nature of the game. If he becomes overwhelmed and acts out, back up the next time and end the game sooner. If you need to build in a consequence, either take five or ten minutes away from the next session (also add minutes if he ends on time without fuss) or lose the next session (keep it simple). Focus on building competency in the face of frustration (using coping skills and tackling the frustration) rather than punishing "losing it." Sorry for so long! There are other ways you can use video games to teach regulating, but too much for one post. Remember, however, video games can be a great teaching tool since they require maintaining emotional control, which is hard for these children. It is a safe place to teach "frustration tolerance" and emotional control. Video games will only mirror other "real life" times of frustration. This series on challenging behavior can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
13.01.2022 Anxiety is something that many of us know all too well. For Autistic insights and advice, please see: Dr. Wenn Lawsons recent "TedB" talk, "Autism and when ...you are feeling a bit anxious." (youtu.be/o8JWwl365Wg) and his wonderful tip sheet for the classroom "When Im Anxious" (tinyurl.com/y7xw6e8t). Sarah Hendrickxs presentation "Autism: How Anxiety Affects Everything" (youtu.be/rPD_yzMHJls) Autistic Science Ladys blog piece "Anxiety Looks Like Anger" (tinyurl.com/w836qmd) Image credit: @worrywellbeing (Instagram)
12.01.2022 Hello everyone I'm so close to 20,000 followers and it's making me burst. Please share my page with all your freinds and help me spread my words and photos to as many people as possible Thank you
09.01.2022 AUTISTIC-LED ONLINE GROUP MENTORING FOR AUTISTIC YOUNG PEOPLE IN AUSTRALIA & NEW ZEALAND (Ages 9-20) Since 2017, we have been a proud leader in providing Autist...ic-led online mentoring for Autistic young people. Our next cycle kicks off the week of September 14th (6 weekly sessions). For full details and/or to submit an Expression of Interest, please use the link below: www.icannetwork.com.au//announcing-our-september-online-me Any further questions? Please reach out directly to our online mentoring team at [email protected].
09.01.2022 Self Abuse Hand/arm biting, slapping self, and headbanging are very common with children with emotional regulation problems. All three behaviors result in stro...ng stimulation that releases stress chemicals when the nervous system is overloaded. Hand/arm biting is especially effective, because of the strong proprioception (resistance to joints and tendons) that it gives. The child gets both strong proprioception into the jaw, as well as into the hand or arm. When the child gets frustrated, the stress chemicals build up to a boiling point, and the child seeks out strong proprioception through self-abuse, aggression, or property destruction to release stress chemicals from the nervous system. To reduce self-abuse you have to do several things: 1. Identify conditions that cause stress and help reduce them. Keep track of the events that precipitate the agitation and build in proactive strategies to reduce the stress. More times than not, the demands (sensory, task performance, social, emotional, etc.) of the situation are greater than the childs current skills for dealing with them. Eliminate, modify, or accommodate these conditions to lower the demands on the child, or provide greater assistance to support the child. Often sensory overload, too much uncertainty, or physical pain is at the root of self-abuse. Use the fragile world on the spectrum (appendix ___) document to help identify and accommodate for the condition that commonly causes problems for your child. 2. Young children, until they develop speech, will engage in self-abuse as a means of communicating distress. Self-abuse becomes their major way of communicating pain, discomfort or need to escape the situation they are in. If your child is nonverbal, try to teach your child to uses picture communication, manual signing, or standard gestures to help him communicate. 3. Identify the function that the behavior serves. All behavior serves a function for the child (to escape something they do not like, communicate frustration, gain something that they want, etc.) Once you determine the function, then teach another behavior to take its place. If the child is engaging in the behavior to escape or avoid something, then identify another way of escaping (using a break card, ask to leave, etc.). If they are doing it for proprioception, then give them another way of getting it (biting tubing, chewing gum, etc.). If the child bites himself when upset, how do you want him to react when upset? If he hits himself to say, leave me alone, how do you want him to communicate this? 4. Once the replacement behavior is determined, have the child practice it when calm and reinforce heavily. You cannot teach new behavior when the child is upset. Practice the new response and, if possible, role-play common situations to practice the response. When the child starts to get upset, prompt the replacement behavior, and reinforce the child for choosing that behavior over the biting. 5. If the child has good control over his behavior, you can reinforce the lack of biting behavior. For example, develop a sticker chart with four or five boxes in a row on it. Have the child pick out a reward that he wants to work for (e.g., rent a video). Place a picture of the reinforcer at the end of the sequence of squares. Each day that he displays no incidences of biting praise the child, and have him put a sticker on his chart (in one of the boxes). Make a big deal over it and have him count how many stickers he needs to earn the video. Once he fills up the boxes with stickers, he gets to rent a video. If he doesnt earn a sticker for the night, then take him to the chart and let him know he cannot have one tonight but he can try again tomorrow. 6. If it is harder for the child to control the behavior, you can use the 1-2-3 approach. Once he starts to bit, you count one, then two, and if you have to say three...he loses his sticker. This way, it gives him a chance to regroup himself. If the child has multiple incidents of biting each day, then reinforce start with first decreasing the frequency of biting per day. If he averages four episodes of biting a day, put up a board of four tags. Each time he bites himself have him take one tag off the board; if he loses all four tags, then he doesnt earn his sticker at the end of the night. However, if he has at least one tag left, he gets his sticker for the day. Once the child learns to hold himself to just three biting incidents a night, then you reduce the tags to three, then to two, etc. until the behavior is infrequent. This series on challenging behavior can be found in the green book, Autism Discussion Page on Anxiety, Behavior, School and Parenting Strategies. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
08.01.2022 Sometimes it is best to say nothing at all! For many children on the spectrum, as they are getting upset, their auditory processing skills collapse. Words beco...me jumbled, confusing, and irritating! Their nervous system is in overload, and their emotions are spiraling. Trying to talk to them can add fuel to the fire and make them more agitated. We mean well; we want to help them out, calm them, and solve the problem for them, but our attempts seem to only add fuel to the fire. For these children, we need to limit what we say or say nothing at all. Depending on your childs ability to process language at that time, the following are suggestions: 1) For some children who still maintain fair processing skills when upset, give clear statements about what the child needs to do. Johnnie, go lie down on your bed can give the child clear information on what they need to do to calm. Especially if the strategy was discussed ahead of time, practiced, and agreed upon. Have a consistent plan of action that is practiced, and routine can help. When the childs thinking skills are collapsing, giving a clear description of what to do can be effective. Do not focus on what the child is doing wrong, counsel them about their behavior, or try to teach more appropriate behavior at this time. It is not the time to teach, talk out of, threaten, or punish. Give information on what to do to cue the child into action. This only works if (1) the coping skill has been agreed upon and practiced, and (2) the child still has some degree of self-control left. 2) For some children who have only partial processing when upset, try to avoid questions, directives, instructions, or counseling. Avoid any statements that direct the child to think or act. Use declarative statements that reflect, describe, ensure, comfort, and soothe. For example, if the child is upset, say, Johnny, you look upset! rather than Whats the matter, Johnny? In the first statement, you are describing what you see, not requiring him to respond. The second statement (question) requires him to process and come up with a response back. This can create more overload and cause greater agitation. When you say Johnny, you look angry! you are (1) reflecting how you see he feels, and (2) inviting him to respond if he chooses to do so. It does not put him on the spot. It may be beneficial to provide reassuring and/or soothing statements, but do not direct the child to think or act. This provides interaction to support, rather than instruct. 3) For the child who cannot process language at all when upset, you might be able to use pictures to convey information. If you have discussed and practiced using a couple of coping strategies, you can have pictures of these on a laminated card that you hand to the child to cue him on what to do. A simple picture can prompt a coping response, where words can aggravate the child more. For these children, auditory information (talking) collapses, and visual information is easier to process. 4) For many children who collapse very quickly, and cannot handle any talking, it is better to say nothing at all. Your words add fuel to the fire and expect him to process more, especially when he is already overwhelmed. Some of these children may still welcome you to help soothe them physically, but cannot process words. This is the child I would provide soothing physical contact or movement but say very little. Or, maybe sing a nursery rhyme or hum a soothing tune, but no language to process. You are simply using the tone and rhythm of your voice to help soothe the child. Then there are other children who cannot handle interaction of any kind. They may be very angry, confused, and overwhelmed, and cannot deal with interacting period! For them simply standing nearby may give them the sense of safety they need. Just knowing that you are there to keep them safe and support them is all they need. 5) Lastly, there are some children who simply need to be alone! Even your presence can overwhelm them. For these children, it is often better to pull back and give them lots of space to calm down on their own. You can provide them with a safe space and any objects (stuffed animals, bean bag, pillows, etc.) that might help them sooth but give no interaction at all. For many children, the type of interaction and amount of language will vary depending on who is doing the intervening, where the problem is occurring, time of day, and how far into the meltdown they are. The earlier you intervene in the "build-up" stage, the more processing they have. Also, a lot depends on the state of their nervous system at the time of their difficulty, and the type of stimulation going on around them. If they have had a stressful day, lack sleep, are hungry, or not feeling well, their processing will decompensate even faster. It is important to understand how your words, voice, and interactions affect your child when upset. Know what style of interaction, if any interaction at all, helps calm and support them. It is important for us to listen to, understand, and respect the childs tolerances. By doing so, we are helping them feel safe, accepted, and supportive during their emotional storm. This series on Shutdowns and Meltdowns can be found in the blue book, Autism Discussion Page on the Core Challenges of Autism. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2
08.01.2022 We love sharing (and re-sharing) the wisdom of our amazing mentees: "Even if Im not looking at you...even if Im fidgeting...even if Im doodling...I am still listening. I do these things so I CAN listen!"
07.01.2022 The Anxiety of Uncertainty; How do they Cope? Because the world is very chaotic and unpredictable for individuals on the spectrum, uncertainty is the childs wo...rse enemy. Since they often cannot read the context of situations, the unwritten rules of conduct, and the perspectives of others, our social world is unpredictable and anxiety-producing. This fear of uncertainty often results in one of two ways of coping: 1. For many autistic children, they welcome and seek out concrete rules and expectations that set boundaries and provides a mental map of when and how to act. For these children, rules are welcomed, and rigidly needed to make the world predictable and minimize anxiety. However, once these rules are established, the child needs them rigidly followed. They also need everyone else to follow them consistently. Otherwise, their predictable world collapses. However, at least the use of rules and clear expectations establish predictable boundaries and lower their anxiety. 2. In contrast, for those with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), external rules and expectations create severe anxiety. For the highly anxious, severe avoiders, rules, and expectations produce an innate fear in them. The threat of uncertainty leads them to fear following the lead of others and resists any concrete expectations and boundaries. Rules immediately elicit opposition. Any attempt of others to guide and direct them elicits an immediate no, even if it is in their favor. These children are so insecure and anxious; they must control all activities and interactions around them. Any expectation or direction elicits fear and immediate avoidance. Like most children on the spectrum, children with PDA have the same fear of uncertainty, but more intense and more generalized to most daily demands. Also, their persistent anxiety doesnt allow them to feel secure following the rules and expectations that others place on them. They must control everything around them to feel safe and secure. They feel too vulnerable to follow the lead of others. It is not just when someone is asking something of them, but all expectations, even those that are easy to meet. Any expectation, easy or difficult. Directions and expectations bring inherent anxiety from the responsibility of meeting these expectations. They often make their own rules and rigidly hold to them. They will resist and adamantly fight any attempt to follow the expectations of others. So, it is not just the immediate requests of others, but also the expectations of the normal daily routine that can create fear and opposition. These children, often cognitively bright, are driven by generalized anxiety and are on high alert for any expectations they will have to meet. Children with PDA are often the most oppositional (driven by anxiety) and exhibit some of the most challenging behaviors. They are fragile, and their sense of security is a very delicate balancing act of allowing them to control most of their daily activity and guiding their development. As you can see, there is a real dimension of how children on the spectrum deal with their fear of uncertainty. On the one end are the children that crave clear, concrete rules and expectations to make the world more understandable and predictable, and on the other end, the children who are so anxious and rigid that they actively resist any rules and expectations and must control all interaction and activity occurring around them. How the child copes with the fear of uncertainty (grave rules or resist them) will dictate their level of anxiety and social/emotional relations with others. For the children whom their resistance is a functional response to their core vulnerabilities, the common strategies listed in the last post, often work for them. However, those individuals with extreme anxiety will resist many of these strategies, because their fear of following the lead of others is so severe that it threatens their core emotional survival. The whole world becomes a battlefield, and most attempts to help them are met with extreme resistance. This article was published in the brown book, The Autism Discussion Page on stress, anxiety, shutdowns and meltdowns https://www.amazon.com/Autism-Discussion-Anxi//ref=sr_1_3
07.01.2022 Terrific insights
07.01.2022 Principles of Positive ReinforcementThe use of positive reinforcement has been used successfully in training all children positive, desirable behavior. However..., to use positive reinforcement successfully you need to know some of the basic principles in apply reinforcement effectively. This presentation takes you through everything you need to know to use an effective reinforcement system for your child. See more
07.01.2022 Dyscalculia is a term used for a wide range of life-long learning disabilities involving maths, numbers, and arithmetic skills. Its generally seen as the mathe...matical equivalent of dyslexia. Autistics have a higher risk of having dyscalculia as a co-morbid condition. And after a lifetime of feeling stupid despite being gifted in most other subjects, I was diagnosed with dyscalculia at 39. Its a brain-related condition that makes basic arithmetic hard to learn, and up to 10% of people have dyscalculia. It can also be associated with ADHD, and up to 60% of people who have ADHD also have a learning disorder, like dyscalculia. People with dyscalculia may lose track when counting and may count on their fingers long after kids the same age have stopped doing it. To this day, I still count on my fingers. Because of being embarrassed, I would hide my hand under the table and mentally feel my fingers through the numbers so no one would notice. I also find it hard to know at a glance how many things are in a group a skill called Subitizing that helps you see a five and a three after you roll the dice, without really counting. This causes a lot of anxiety when playing family games that involve dice. Luckily I have a nephew on the spectrum who is gifted in math, and he gladly comes to my rescue. So much more awareness is needed for learning disabilities like dyscalculia. I can tell you from experience that living with an undiagnosed learning disability is maddening. Because of my good grades in other subjects, I was called lazy and told to try harder every time I voiced my frustrations; from elementary school all the way up to college when I was crying in the counselors office sobbing about how I could be such a smart dumb person. It made me feel like a fraud and diminished my other accomplishments. I never want anyone else to feel like that. So please share and lets raise more awareness for this unrecognized very real learning disability. #actuallyautistic #hsp #spoonie #spoonielife #autism #aspie #autistic #autisticadults #autismawareness #neurodiversity #autismcommunity #autismproud #mentalhealthadvocate #neurodiverse #aspielife #aspergers #EDS #mentalhealthrmatters #autisticpride #autismadvocate #neurodivergent #mentalhealth #ADHD #OCD #anxietyrelief #ADHDproblems #dyscalculia Image ID: A purple and orange ombre background with the word dyscalculia at the top. Underneath reads number dyslexia with numbers one through eight. Signs below are, trouble with mental math. Needs a calculator to figure out tips. May count with fingers. Frequently late. Slow telling time on an analog clock. Difficulty with remembering names and number related dates and facts. Struggles to keep scoring games often losing track of whos turn it is. Gets lost easily. Misplaces objects frequently. Misjudges how long it will take to drive somewhere.
06.01.2022 #ICYMI this incredible clip from Channel 4 #EducatingGreaterManchester It's fantastic to see headteacher Drew Povey explain to student Jacob that dyslexia "makes his mind work in a different way" Watch more about #DyslexicStrengths https://fb.watch/1W4uf07RrH/
06.01.2022 Through darkness, light always finds a way.
05.01.2022 "Great minds dont always think alike" Artist: Anne Belle (image shared with permission) #Neurodiversity
05.01.2022 Match fury with calmness Generally, it is important to realize that when you match a childs intense emotion with your own intense emotion, you will more than l...ikely fuel the fire. You want to do the opposite. The louder the child happens to be, the quieter you want to interact with him. The more rigid he is, the more flexible you need to be. Match fury with calmness. Assume the more oppositional the child is, the more inadequate he is feeling. If your child is responding to fast or too roughly, counteract it with slowing yourself down or softening your play. Model what you want to see your child do, and soften it a little. If the child is not attending, stop the action until he references your demonstration. Do not scold, counsel, or coax, simply slow it down, calm it down, and soften the volume. Match intensity with calmness, model what you seek, and praise cooperation! You will often find that you both calm a lot faster. Validate, stay calm, and as quiet as possible. Lol. I know, easier said than done!
05.01.2022 Underarousal leads to self abuse There are many reasons for self abuse but one reason is an under-aroused nervous system that drives sensory seeking. Like othe...r forms of sensory stimulation (chewing gum, smoking, tapping our feet, twisting our hair, etc) that we all seek when under-aroused, ongoing tactile stimulation like self hitting, biting, scratching, etc is used by some who need more intense sensory feedback to stay aroused. The New York Times referenced a study today where they asked people to sit in a room alone for just 15 minutes to simply be to themselves. The only stimulation offered was an opportunity to provide oneself a brief electrical shock. During the brief 15 minutes, 67% of men choose to shock themselves and 25% of women did, suggesting men tend to become bored (underaroused) sooner than women. Over years I have seen ongoing self injury which appeared to be the result of sensory seeking to alert an under-aroused nervous system. Unfortunately, this ongoing stimulation seems to become addicting over time. We will discussing this further in upcoming posts. I just found the study interesting in this regard.
04.01.2022 Fragile World on The Spectrum-Basic Premise
02.01.2022 On the 1st of August myself and fellow autistic advocates & residents of Chester, took to the street to deliver my demonstrative performance in the name of Auti...stic Civil Rights. A mix of expressive Disability dance, autistic stimming, Body Movement politics and the right to occupy public spaces like anybody else. I hope to appear in Liverpool this week. Please consider making a contribution or a hat tip at https://www.paypal.me/sarajaneharvey to help fund my travel, advocacy & work. Thank you Alice Boorman for the transcript & Mariana from Neurodivergencia Au for the subtitles: together we are stronger! #teamwork Here goes... My name is Sara Harvey and I am autistic. I had no idea that I was autistic though, until five years ago when I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist. I thought I was just crazy. I thought I was just insane. I thought there was something really wrong with me for being autistic, for being different, even though all my difference was was that this world was a bit too bright, bit too loud, bit too busy. A lot. A lot scary, and I didnt know how to navigate it. So being in school was really traumatic for me. I do consider myself quite a privileged autistic, in that I am here today to even say these words. The biggest killer of autistic people, my loves, is epilepsy and suicide, and I know that both of those things are preventable. It hurts me getting messages - Im an online advocate, autistic advocate, Agony Autie is my blog, we get messages day in and day out from children terrified to go to school because they stim. So some children cant speak, some autistics will never speak, some autistics may need lifelong care, some autistics may need holistic support, but most of all we just need your understanding and your patience, and to know we are not a threat. This is not a threat. Its just a part of being autistic which I do when Im very nervous, and Im very nervous. So I choose to stim dance, I chose, um, instead of hurting myself and whacking at myself and Id get upset and have a meltdown, an autistic meltdown, overload, I choose to regulate my breathing, I choose to stim and tic, and hum, and rock, and tap, but its difficult when there are people around me. Security guards, hospital staff, teachers, parents, people who should know this is distress, or just sometimes autistic joy. So Im here today in the streets to be visible, and if you do know anyone whos autistic or if youre autistic yourself, I invite you to write a message on a little person here. Tell me why youre autistic and proud or tell me what needs to change. Because I am proud to be autistic despite the shame placed on me for being very different. Um, so, Im gonna do a stim dance and this ones dedicated to Oliver McGowan. Justice for Oliver Oliver, I do this in his name, because Oliver was an epileptic 18 year old autistic man, young man. Teenager. 18 year old Oliver McGowan was taken to hospital during an epileptic fit, and despite being scared, he persistently said sorry for being autistic and afraid. Oliver, when afraid, said I will be okay I am going to America and Im going to meet-. They saw this as psychosis. And against his parents wishes, Oliver was put on antipsychotic medication, causing him to go brain dead. He died shortly after. This is what his mother said, his mother said they stole her son. Many autistic people with learning disabilities are in crisis when in A&E. And sadly for Oliver, his autism was labelled as delusional, which resulted in them giving him antipsychotics which they knew he was allergic to, they knew he was allergic to them, but they wanted to control all of this. The distress. He just needed a calm safe space, all our hospitals need autism policies, our schools need autism policies. Our towns, our streets, need autism policies. Where are the autistics? There are 1 in 80 to 1 in 100 autistics with a footfall of 30,000 in Chester, where are they? Families are often too afraid to bring their kids out, theyre often afraid to come out in the streets. We need to create safer spaces. Oliver is no longer with us and it was entirely avoidable so I do this stim dance for Oliver, and for every single autistic who has lost their life to being so misunderstood with their behaviours, and I am so lucky to be here so thank you, thank you so much for listening to me, its my first ever street performance. Thank you for taking the time to stop and listen to me. Thank you. Remember people like Oliver because theyre no longer here with us. This could be my son. Can you please defend autistic people with all of your might. Thank you for watching. Im gonna go and get a cup of tea!
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