Belinda Haan | Other
Belinda Haan
Phone: +61 403 970 545
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23.01.2022 This is what YOU should ask for from Santa. I am sure you’ve been busy thinking about and buying presents for teachers, kids, partners, friends, and family. Here is some inspiration on what YOU could give as a present to yourself. My brother Troy buys a gift every year and puts it under the tree with the tag reading "To Troy, From Troy". I love this idea, so here’s an idea for your very own gift to yourself. Make yourself a gift voucher for half a day on your own (the gre...atest gift of all?!). Negotiate to have a child-free half day if it is possible. Otherwise, this could also be done at night/morning over a week. Start the half-day with something nurturing. Then, whip out a journal and do some reflection on the year that has passed (#itsbeenayear) and for the year you’d love to have ahead of you. Here are some example questions to give you some structure if you need it. 2020 (a year we will never forget!) What have you learned about yourself this year? What have you found most challenging? What were the key parts of the year that had the greatest impact (positive/negative)? How did you treat yourself through the challenges/uncertainty/fear/stress that arose? What are you most proud of? What are you most grateful for? What other things have happened that you want to recognise, appreciate, or give space to think about? 2021 Imagine it is 12-months from today. 2021 has turned out better than you could have imagined. What is happening? Make some notes and notice any themes, habits or changes you’ve made. How would you like to FEEL in 2021? What would you love to do more of? What would you love to do less of? What will you let go of to create more space for yourself? What will you bring into 2021 that you learned from 2020? How will you support yourself through uncertainty? What works and what doesn't? How can you best fill up your own bucket and, what support will you find to make this happen? The gift of space. The best gift of all? And if you give this same gift to your partner or friend, you will feel amazing too! #doublewin Enjoy Save Post for later
23.01.2022 A healing meditation for 2020 (be aware of the volume of this if you are at work!) Thank you Kate for this, it cracked me up! https://www.facebook.com/hermajestyqueendillydally/videos/1741359236014439
20.01.2022 I have been dreaming of a gathering place for mums to visit - one that allows them to connect with each other, and themselves. A place that honours and empowers them. Initially, I was thinking this would be a physical space. One like the incredible Motherhood Center that I visited in New York. I was contemplating how much this would cost to make happen and how many women could physically get there. So I started opening my mind to how this *feeling* of being held and supported..., a sense of belonging and empowerment could be created online. Could it be? I searched for the right platform and I always knew it was not on Facebook. I did not want to create more reasons to be on social media for either myself or other mothers. I personally find it triggering, noisy and distracting and these are the opposite conditions of what I am trying to create. I have now found the right 'home' for mothers. A beautiful, community-driven technology that provides a loving space to support this wild and beautiful ride called motherhood. I feel a growing mission and passion to rewrite the motherhood experience. Motherhood has a lot of suffering inherent within it but I believe there is also a lot of unnecessary suffering. I am wholeheartedly committed to contributing to more ease in motherhood. One thing I have been experimenting with this year is gathering mums with babies as well as mums with toddlers and school-age children. I had a feeling this would be powerful and it has been. When mothers support each other, it is magical! The virtual home for the Motherhood Gathering has some cool technology features such as: the ability to connect with women in your area (I dream of face-to-face gatherings happening from this!) mothers with the same and different-age children to gather and share their challenges, successes and wisdom. a beautiful way to organise content, resources and tools so that mums can pop in and 'choose your own adventure' style learning and support. no noise and distractions - a loving and safe space just focused on you and your motherhood journey. Although I have been progressing this community since March, we are only one month in! Each month we will have a theme related to motherhood and in November we are exploring Energy and Vitality. New membership for this month closes on 1 November. If you are a mum to baby, toddler or primary-age child, I'd love you to join us and feel free to share with your friends or others who may be interested. You can check out more here: https://themotherhoodgathering.mn.co/ Big love, Bel x
19.01.2022 This knowledge can completely transform the motherhood experience. There, I said it. What if a woman knew what the normal aspects of the transition into motherhood were? Not the Huggies' Ad version. I believe motherhood provides a perfect container for shame to grow because the less sentimental aspects are not freely spoken about. When a woman is told she should 'enjoy every moment' but doesn't, she can believe there is something wrong with her. As motherhood is firmly with...in the moral context, a woman can be too afraid or ashamed to share her (very natural) mixed emotions for the negative judgment it may bring. It is hard even to imagine there was a time when no-one knew what Adolescence was. Well, we are in that time right now for mothers where very few people know or understand the rite of passage called Matrescence. Simply knowing about Matrescence has the potential to transform. Thank you, Women's Agenda for helping lift the veil.
18.01.2022 Learning about this one thing could have the most profound, transformational impact on all mothers. Have you heard about Matrescence? No? A little?... Adolescence + Matrescence = same, same, but different. Imagine a time when no one knew about adolescence. We are in that stage for the transition into motherhood (matrescence). If you are a mother or know a mother, do yourself a favour and learn about matrescence. Empowering yourself with the knowledge of matrescence could go a long way to reducing the shame that often goes hand in hand with motherhood. Let's shine a light on this important topic . We owe it to all mothers.
16.01.2022 Initially, when I started the Motherhood Gathering, there was a part of me that felt I was giving up my old career in coaching and leadership facilitation. Now with the benefit of hindsight, I see how they are all blending together. One of the things I love experimenting with is bringing coaching psychology into the mothers' experience - does it apply? One theory that I discuss in the Motherhood Gathering is William Bridges' Transition Model. This was originally introduced ...to me in 2008 when I started my Master's program. I was flawed. It helped me to articulate why I was feeling so personally stuck at the time - I realised I was in the 'neutral zone'. When I started considering what would be useful for new mothers, this model came back to me. I wondered if it would help articulate the transition from woman to mother? I now provide a bit of information about this model with new mothers as it helps conceptualise their early experiences. Passing through the stages can feel like a wild and confusing ride, but it cannot be rushed or skipped over, and it is an entirely normal psychological process when going through life-altering transitions. 1. Letting go of the old situation and identity that went with itgrief over the endings. 2. Neutral zone between their old reality and a new reality that may still be very unclear. It is a time where hope and despair oscillate, and it can feel so uncomfortable that all a woman can do sometimes is go through the motions. It is also where reorientation happens. It is where the woman learns more about herself and what she wants from life and how to integrate mothering with being a woman. 3. Creating a new beginning that is much more than simply a new start. It involves developing new competencies, new relationships, becoming comfortable in the new rhythm and way of being. It can feel like a rebirththe birth of a mother.
08.01.2022 Gifts of the Mid-Life Unraveling Since turning 40 almost two years ago, I am not going to lie; there have been some very painful moments. The journey back to who I really am sounds magical, and it has been. And, it has also been excruciating. Old patterns, beliefs and behaviours that no longer serve me have been blasted one by one. And then they come back in a new form. I will share more in the future about the suffering and magic that has been the past two years. But... for now, I want to share the gift of all of this. This morning I was writing a training module on Matrescence with the hope to play my part in transforming the motherhood experience. Mid-morning I picked flowers and foliage from my yard to prepare for the Sacred Mother circle I am shortly running. And soon, I will welcome the most incredible women to gather together to share this wild ride and connect within. So in this moment, I am so grateful for all that has unfolded because it has created more beauty than I really could have ever imagined.
08.01.2022 Calming yourself and your kids down in a stressful moment. There are certain situations that can trigger us into reactivity and stress. Here is a quick and effective exercise to calm our bodies and minds in those moments and it is great one for kids as well! I love the idea of getting the kids involved in helping me to relax https://youtu.be/5QVqMaWrP-s... Fast forward to 3 minutes for the technique or watch the whole thing for the science behind it.
03.01.2022 Imagine if all people who came into contact with a mother who has a bub treated her like this... They believe in her wisdom and strength. They 100% believe that the mother is the expert in her own life and she simply needs support to uncover her strength and wisdom; They hold space for her to express all range of emotions without making her feel like any of it is wrong, scary or bad. They normalise the mixed feelings that inevitably come with motherhood; They ask open q...uestions to help the woman to explore what she and her baby needs; They recognise that mothers are 100% committed to creating the right conditions for the baby's flourishing; They take into account the wellbeing of BOTH the mother and her baby. They look at the system of the family and provide options so that the mother can decide what is best; They hold the mother with compassion, warmth and mindfulness; They realise what a positive or negative impact they can have simply by their words and their intentions. I have had so many mums share how hurt or confused they have been through the words and advice of well-intentioned people. Motherhood has so many challenging parts within it; let's positively contribute through loving words and intentions with the mother. I know there are some incredible people flying this flag too, your kindness does not go unnoticed
02.01.2022 I've accidentally started a podcast! I have contemplated starting a podcast for some time. But there were too many barriers. Fear of getting it wrong. ... Fear of getting found out (#impostersyndrome). Fear of negative judgment. Self-doubt is a regular passenger in my car, so it was put in the too hard basket . Everything to do with the Motherhood Gathering has been pushing me to get over myself because my desire to be of service has finally trumped my fear and doubt. I have put one foot in front of the other, and it is only with hindsight that I recognise how far I have come. This podcast is another example. I wanted to make it easy for tired, busy mums to get support within the new Motherhood Gathering community. This way, they will be able to access all audio content in their usual podcast feed. The difference? This is a private podcast . Only women in the Motherhood Gathering community will be able to access it. This felt like a safe and doable container for me, and it also is aligned to my values of connection and belonging. When the brave mothers share their stories, only women in the community can listen. When a guest teacher shares their wisdom, we can discuss together. This podcast has: Stories of Motherhood: interviews with mothers on the authentic motherhood experience. Guest experts: wisdom and knowledge to support mothers on this wild ride. Mindfulness snacks: self-inquiry and stillness practices for inner connection and awareness. I am excited to invite all of our lovely mothers to join soon. These women always spur me on to feel the fear and do it anyway . If you are a mother to a baby, toddler or primary-school-age child, you are very welcome to join our community which opens again later this month. You can join the waitlist here: https://themotherhoodgathering.mn.co/ Big love, Bel xxx
