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Bronte Therapy

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14.01.2022 A baby, toddler or child who is struggling at drop off is simply a child who is feeling unsafe. They are NOT: - Being manipulative - Giving you a hard time o...n purpose - Trying to make you feel bad. When you look at this through your adult lens, it might be hard to understand why they don’t feel safe. You know they are going to be looked after. You know they will be fine. Their nervous system doesn’t know that. It’s ramped up, sensing that it is about to disconnected from the adults responsible for keeping them alive... and it doesn’t feel good. They can’t just switch off their whole nervous system, and they can’t engage their parasympathetic nervous system (the part that helps them settle) without your help. Shaming, dismissing and guilting a child for not feeling safe isn’t fair. Yelling at them will actively make them feel even less safe. There’s no need to be like that! You’re making it so hard on mum. C’mon there’s no need for that. We do this every day! This is ridiculous! She’s just manipulating you. Drop her off and run, she’ll get over it. No. It amounts to gaslighting, and kids deserve better than this. So what do we do instead? 1 Take your eyes off the behaviour so that you can look behind it, and see the feeling. 2 Let them express what they feel, and help them hold it. Let them know that feeling is normal and you’ve felt it before too. Let them know that you know they are going to be ok, even if they don’t know that right now. 3 Focus your attention on helping them feel safe throughout the transition, and let the approach you take next flow from this place instead of any other. It’s not easy. It’s not easy because it was probably never done for you and you may never have even seen it done. You have to breathe and you have to trust that it will work. And when it does, it will feel SO much better than the alternative. May the parenting force be with you. You’ve got this. Peaceful pic of trees to settle your own nervous system!

13.01.2022 Love this post. Special time doesn't have to be long and complex #parenting #positiveparenting #gentleparenting #resilience #respectfulparenting #psychologist #play #playtherapy #childdevelopment #childtherapy #parentingtips #teachers #asd #family #life #adhd #mumlife #momlife #dads

08.01.2022 kids that are anxious often have difficulty calming their thoughts enough for sleep. When all is quiet, that is when their thoughts seem to come flooding in. Th...ese are the kids that come out 10 times because they have to tell you something. When they are overwhelmed by feelings it will come out as behaviour. They might be defiant, aggressive, teary, clingy or any other expression of emotion. More information on my blog https://www.thetherapistparent.com//overcoming-nightmares- Link in bio #sleep #empoweringchildren #dreams #parenting #positiveparenting #gentleparenting #resilience #respectfulparenting #psychologist #play #playtherapy #childdevelopment #childtherapy #parentingtips #teachers #asd #family #life #adhd #mumlife #momlife #dads #anxiety

05.01.2022 The ability to regulate through the comfort of another is called co-regulation. This on repeat wires up the brain for self-regulation, emotional intelligence, e...mpathic responses, rational thinking and problem-solving. Lelia Schott If you would like to be kept in the loop on everything Neurochild please submit your details here http://bit.ly/neurochild-connect #neurochild #coregulation #empathy #biologicallife

01.01.2022 What do families that work well do differently to those that don't and how can you incorporate more of it into your own family? These top tips come from family ...therapist Oliver Drakeford and focus on: 1. Dinner Time 2. Self Care 3. Extended Family 4. Communication 5. Partnerships "I work using a Family Systems lens which has fundamental belief that we don’t exist in a bubble, but in a system. Part of what this means is that a behavior or feeling in one person in the group affects everyone else. It also means that our sense of ‘self’ comes from the relationships we have within our family. By improving the relationships with family members, we will ultimately have a stronger sense of ‘self’ to live a better, happier and more adjusted life." Read the full article: https://medium.com//five-tips-for-a-happier-family-15534da