Dr Emma Black, Clinical Psychologist in Hyde Park, Queensland, Australia | Medical and health

Dr Emma Black, Clinical Psychologist

Locality: Hyde Park, Queensland, Australia

Phone: +61 7 4772 2555

Address: 107 Charters Towers Road 4817 Hyde Park, QLD, Australia

Website: http://www.townsvillepsychologist.com.au/

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25.01.2022 A letter to dads- with practical steps included. https://www.kidspot.com.au//ca8754ee0fc2a04b6f5fe1a8ec30c0

25.01.2022 Apprehensive worry involves worrying about the future, and it typically consists of focusing on worst-case scenarios. You see it all play out in your head: how making a necessary comment to your boss then somehow leads to you losing your job; how a routine medical investigation then means you are facing a horrible health outcome; how going for a job interview will result in rejection and humiliation; how spending time with your friends will somehow lead to everyone hating you.... When youre facing something that makes you a little anxious, its easy for your thoughts to take you to the worst-case scenarios, which will make you a lot anxious. And then you go over and over all the bad things that could happen, so the anxiety sticks around far longer than what is helpful. But sometimes you get a little attached to this thought process. If you can plan and prepare for bad outcomes, then you know that you can cope with them (in the unlikely event that they actually happen). So you take comfort in knowing that you can cope with bad outcomes in the future, as youve planned for this. But what gets overlooked is that youve actually been quite anxious in the meantime, and often unnecessarily- because the worst possible outcomes often dont end up happening. So what can be done to help shift this process that causes distress and also serves a purpose for you? Having a balanced thought process about future outcomes is the key. And this can be done by asking yourself the following questions: 1. What is the worst-case scenario that could happen? And, how likely is this to actually happen? If the worst happened, is there a chance that it could somehow work out ok? 2. What is the best-case scenario that could happen? 3. What is the most realistic or likely scenario to occur? Trying to balance your thought process to consider positives, negatives, and realistic outcomes can help break the pattern of getting stuck in apprehensive worry.

25.01.2022 The mental load and suddenly, you’re failing! The way it happened, I was brushing my teeth late at night at the laundry sink. I began looking at our dirty laundry sink. ‘This really needs to be cleaned’, I thought. And then I began thinking about all the other household jobs that need to get done. I remembered that I even had a list with some of them written down on, so I can’t forget. And in remembering ALL the jobs, I also remembered that I had no time to do ALL the jobs.... And I started remembering the little jobs piling up for me at work. Then I started remembering all the things coming up for our family that I needed to be on top of. Which reminded me further of how much isn’t getting done. And so on. When my thoughts first started going, I was in them. When they started switching to how I was failing in multiple areas, I realised what was happening. I began watching them instead, curious how far this was going to go. I had a moment where I thought to myself, ‘Aha! This is the mental load’. And not just the mental load; ‘This is also my perfectionist load Because things aren’t perfect, my mind is telling me that I’m failing’. I watched my thoughts, I named what was happening, and in doing this, I also separated from them- which meant that my emotions didn’t spiral. I also challenged the unhelpful thoughts happening. I remember thinking, funny how brushing my teeth in a different place suddenly equals me not doing what I ‘need’ to. (Is it really a need? No, which is why these things haven’t been done yet). Funny how seeing a dirty sink equals my failings. And I oriented to the facts: A dirty sink is just a dirty sink. If having a clean laundry sink was really a priority for me, I could make the time to clean it within a few minutes or ask someone else to do it. I have my mental load noted in multiple places (lists, calendars) to get to at the right time or in the future. The important stuff always gets done, at work and at home. And my perfectionist load has been weakening for years, so watch it run aground here. My laundry sink can stay dirty. Ain’t nobody got time for that. #mentalload #observeyourthoughts #challengeyourthoughts

25.01.2022 Anxiety Components Your bodys stress or anxiety response is made of several different parts that all work together, and sometimes these build on each other- and your anxiety spirals. To disrupt this process, its essential to be aware of what these components are. As follows: 1. A physical response: such as racing heart, rapid or shallow breathing, and muscle tension (to name just a few); 2. An emotional response: feeling worried, apprehensive, scared, or panicky;... 3. A behavioural response: such as avoiding that situation or person that makes you anxious, or procrastinating on tasks; 4. A thinking response: for example, going over the worst-case scenarios that could happen and catastrophising outcomes. It is possible to disrupt anxiety and its domino effect by changing a response in any of the above areas. For example: 1. Changing your physical response: you can do this with practising skills such as relaxation or deep breathing (but make sure your breath out is longer than your breath in!) 2. Changing behaviour: tackle that task youve been avoiding, or find gentle ways to expose yourself to feared situations will help you see that you can tolerate them better than you thought (assuming they are not physically dangerous, of course) 3. Questioning negative thinking, with such questions as: - What is the worst that could happen? What are the odds of this feared outcome really happening? Is my feared outcome actually going to make a large impact on my life in the longer term? - What is the best that could happen? - And, what is most likely to happen in this situation? 4. Changing your emotional response of worry and apprehension. Seek out things that will help you feel differently. For example, you might feel too overwhelmed to want to be with other people; but seeing a friend and having a good laugh can make you feel better. So can exercising or watching a comedy. If you can disrupt the anxiety process across multiple domains (behaviour, thinking, emotion, and physical), you can influence and change your anxiety response rather than it spiralling out of control. And when this occurs, you get evidence that youre more competent than you thought- which also helps weaken anxiety.

24.01.2022 Some suggestions on ways to connect with children on the daily.

24.01.2022 A resource from the Australian Psychological Society on managing anxiety regarding Coronavirus.

23.01.2022 Rethinking the Strong, Independent Woman Thanks to the media, it's a fairly safe bet that most people can picture what a strong independent woman looks like. Many of us will know someone who embodies this: the sort of person who doesn't complain, gets the job done, and works hard. This can be women in the workplace, women being breadwinners, women taking care of their family, and more. The sort of woman you can turn to in a pinch. The sort of woman who backs herself....Continue reading

23.01.2022 A free trial to test online, interactive therapy for Bulimia Nervosa is available for adults. To find out more, click on the following link: https://beet.insideoutinstitute.org.au/

22.01.2022 Your body’s stress response: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn When we face an acute threat or stress, our bodies undergo physiological changes to get us ready to respond to the danger or stressor. You might have heard of the ‘Fight or Flight’ Response (more information here- https://townsvillepsychologist.com.au/stress-fear-and-anxi/). In the Flight response, people typically feel acute fear or anxiety, with urges to run away or escape a situation. In the Fight response, peop...le can feel very angry, with urges to confront the danger to end the threat. However, what is less commonly known is that bodies can also help us survive danger in other ways. We also have a Freeze response, which can involve different types of freezing. One is literally the ‘deer in headlights’ or ‘mouse playing dead’ response, where you feel unable to move at all when threatened. It can also involve dissociating and feeling numb. Another version of this is much briefer, where you may freeze for a few moments to assess the danger. In these moments, your brain decides what type of action is likely to help most, and then you take action. Sometimes a lot can happen within a few seconds, so it can feel like a very long time. We also have a Fawn response. This involves efforts to please others, or make or keep them happy- so you can feel safe or unthreatened within relationships. A fawn response can include: difficulty saying no to requests (even when they are unreasonable); going out of your way to do things for other people (often at your own expense); and finding it difficult to express your thoughts or feelings. The Fawn response's main purpose is avoiding conflict with other people, because this seems dangerous or has been dangerous in the past. It’s worth noting that all of these stress responses can be helpful and adaptive for people at one point or another. However, the stress response can cause problems when activated under several conditions, such as: - When you are chronically stressed (this is designed to be a short term response). - When you are traumatised, you keep re-experiencing the trauma and your stress response to it, in the absence of actual danger. - When a certain environment is stressful but requires a different response; for example, freezing or running away does not help you with public speaking. Learning stress management skills and addressing the impact of past traumas can help change your stress response when it does not help you the way it is meant to.

22.01.2022 Aspects of Stress Stress often results from overwhelming or difficult events (stressors), and tends to involve too much change, too much information, too many demands, or too much responsibility. There are a lot of great resources circulating currently outlining stress management skills, such as self-care, exercise, relaxation, and managing worries and expectations. I dont want to repeat those, so Im considering stress from another angle: the too much phenomenon. If you...Continue reading

22.01.2022 When you come to therapy, you talk about your life and difficulties. And often it seems like that is what the process is: we talk about stuff. From my side, we're never just talking. As we talk, and we feel the feelings (I'm in those moments with you too!), what rattles around my head are several things. Theories. Therapy models. Interventions. And scientific research. All sifted through in order to find the one that I think will be most helpful to produce some type of chang...e for the better. So whilst we talk, I'm rarely 'just talking'. I'm talking with purpose in order to create some change. Whether that's a creating a new perspective that makes the problem seem more manageable. Creating room for emotional experiencing and processing, so that painful emotions are less overwhelming. Introducing a skill that the research says is really helpful in reducing a particular symptom. Creating an action plan so that you don't feel so lost. And this all occurs within the therapy relationship- because all of us need connection and support.

22.01.2022 A fascinating read about what could be expected from the remaining time left in isolation, and impacts afterward

21.01.2022 Coping with the impact of coronavirus on eating disorders: helpful information from The Butterfly Foundation

21.01.2022 What if we talked about physical health the absurd way we talk about mental health?

19.01.2022 Rethinking the Strong, Independent Woman Thanks to the media, its a fairly safe bet that most people can picture what a strong independent woman looks like. Many of us will know someone who embodies this: the sort of person who doesnt complain, gets the job done, and works hard. This can be women in the workplace, women being breadwinners, women taking care of their family, and more. The sort of woman you can turn to in a pinch. The sort of woman who backs herself....Continue reading

19.01.2022 I often end up asking clients some version of this question: What will make your life better? When thinking about what will make your life better, also consider the context around it. For example, if youre debating whether to go exercise or not, the context of your life and personal goals will determine if it is a helpful choice or not. You may be so sleep deprived and genuinely needing a sleep in, more than physical activity- in which case, sleeping in would actually make your life better. Or, you may have been depressed and overwhelmed recently, in which case, exercising would actually create the opportunity to feel better (more so than staying home feeling tired and awful). The aim is to make positive decisions and guide behaviour in helpful directions. I find that I also ask myself this question in my own life!

19.01.2022 Some creative ways on how to date your partner currently

19.01.2022 Just because this cracks me up:

18.01.2022 #perinatalloss #findingrelief PREGNANCY & INFANT LOSS AWARENESS MONTH Self-compassion can provide temporary relief to the unbearable reality of pregnancy loss o...r infant death. You are not alone many many women have experienced perinatal loss across centuries, across borders and from all walks of life. They know your pain. At times when you are struggling or hurting, if can be helpful to remind yourself of this that you are not alone. If you can, try placing your hand on your heart (or caress/cradle your face) (and notice the warmth of your hand. And notice how soothing that feels and notice that your brain instantly responds to that sensory data -& bypasses your thinking brain and notice it is still soothing even if it’s not a hug from someone else). And while aware of your situation, acknowledge: This is a moment of suffering Suffering is part of life So, may I be kind to myself in this moment May I give myself the compassion I need. (Adapted from Kristen Neff and Julie King). Illustration by Jesses Mess - Illustrations

17.01.2022 Understanding Panic Panic attacks come on suddenly: sometimes in response to a clear trigger, sometimes after a build-up, and sometimes out of the blue. Even when you cant identify a reason for the panic attack, there is usually a trigger that has set it off. This trigger can be internal or external. An example of an external trigger could be the last place you had a panic attack, which gets linked to the panic attack in your mind (and then seen as threatening)- so when you ...visit the same location, another panic attack is prompted. Triggers can also be internal, such as a thought, image, or memory, or a body sensation. People who experience panic attacks see body sensations (such as breathlessness, racing heart, racing thoughts, or dizziness) as bad or catastrophic. For example: - racing thoughts = you are going crazy or losing control; - dizziness = you will collapse or faint; - breathlessness = you cant breathe; - racing heart or chest tightness = youre having a heart attack. The hard part is that when you interpret a range of body sensations as threatening, you become vigilant to them and tense. When youre monitoring your body for signs of threat, youre more likely to notice sensations or feelings that you wouldnt otherwise. And when youre tense, youre more likely to have anxious symptoms such as breathlessness, heart palpitations, and dizziness. Its good to know that anxiety and panic often respond to psychological treatment. One small step you can take in the right direction is to consider how realistic your thoughts are. For example: have you ever actually collapsed during a panic attack, lost control, gone crazy, suffocated, or had a heart attack? If not, this is unlikely to happen- and therefore, not a real threat. Remind yourself that body changes are not evidence of imminent disaster.

17.01.2022 I often hear people say things like, I shouldnt have felt this way [insert sad/angry/other emotion]. It implies that it is wrong to have some feelings, and that you should always feel positive. Thinking this way is going to cause problems- because emotions are important and valid. Emotions give us information about what is happening in our environment, and they cause changes in our body and behaviour so that we can effectively respond to what is happening. For example- if ...someone takes advantage of you at work, then naturally you will feel angry. Anger is designed to drive you to correct wrongs and seek justice- so you may feel strong urges to do something like confront your co-worker or complain to your boss. These action urges are designed to correct the wrong and prevent it from happening again. But... If you tell yourself, It is not that big a deal, I shouldnt get angry, getting angry with other people is wrong, then what happens? You will not address the issue, making it more likely the same thing could happen again. You will also experience a negative reaction to your anger, such as feeling shame or guilt that you were angry in the first place. Or you might feel frustrated with yourself that you got angry when you dont want to! This secondary emotion occurs in response to the first, primary emotion, and increases your turmoil and emotional distress. Primary emotions are important- they help us, they give us essential information about things we may not be fully conscious of (think of gut feelings), and they tell us what to do. They are valid, and worth acknowledging. Not acknowledging these emotions causes more emotional suffering. Treat your emotions are messengers: listen to them, notice your action urges, and then decide what to do with this information.

17.01.2022 Women, Hormones, & Mental Health Women are at higher risk of developing a range of mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. One contributor is thought to be hormonal changes, as the risks increase during periods of hormonal change. This includes: - Puberty - Pregnancy and postpartum (the highest risk time for women)... - Perimenopause and menopause - Some women can even develop symptoms premenstrually (called premenstrual dysphoria) - In rare cases, symptoms can be linked to the let-down reflex during breastfeeding (called dysphoric milk ejection reflex) - There is also evidence that some hormonal contraception has a link to depression Of course, it is not as simple as hormones alone causing mental health problems. There are several gendered factors that increase the risk for women, which include: - Cultural and social expectations and pressures. For example, judgement around how women should and shouldn’t behave, or should and shouldn't look. - Gendered violence and trauma (such as sexual assault and domestic violence), which is linked to higher rates of post-traumatic stress, anxiety, and depression. - Experiencing sexualisation and objectification. - Gender-specific stress. For example, when women become mothers, major life and identity transitions occur. This can be compounded by increased demands involved in becoming a primary caregiver and typically doing the bulk of the housework (even when both spouses work). Women also tend to shoulder the ‘mental load’, or the mental and emotional labour involved in managing the family household. These risks are in addition to the general vulnerabilities for mental health issues, which include the following: - Biological vulnerabilities, such as a genetic risk. For example, if depression runs in your family - Social vulnerabilities, such as lacking supports. - Psychological vulnerabilities, such as being rigid or perfectionistic. - Lifestyle contributions, such as a sedentary lifestyle or poor diet When you consider all of the above, it’s no wonder that women have higher rates of mental health issues. The general vulnerabilities, compounded by gender-specific vulnerabilities, combined with hormonal change may create the ‘perfect storm’ for developing symptoms. Please reach for help if you need it- with support and new skills, it is possible to find your way through the storm. #womensmentalhealth

16.01.2022 Its not easy being a woman. Consider the expectations regarding how youre supposed to behave or the judgement that follows. Be kind, nurturing, and gentle, but dont be a pushover. Stand up for yourself, but not too much (or youll be demanding, nagging, aggressive, or a bitch). Be independent, but not too much. Be sexually available, but not too much or too little (or youll be frigid, or a slut). Be the right weight- or no one will value you. Get married and have childr...Continue reading

16.01.2022 My most cited journal article to date... If anyone else gets excited by scientific literature. https://journals.sagepub.com/d/abs/10.1177/0004867415569802

15.01.2022 When you weigh yourself everyday you are measuring the following . - hydration/dehydration - bowel movement/no bowel movement - phase of menstrual cycle... - full/empty stomach - full/empty bladder . Often people weigh themselves because if by some chance they see the figure go down they feel happy momentarily.... until its not enough . Being educated about weight fluctuations and set point is super important . If your dietitian or health professional doesnt care about your weight on a daily basis neither should you . As always listen to individual advice given by your medical team and feel comfortable to ask for their explanation . . #thegoodfoodclinic #stopweighingyourselfeveryday #scalesneedinterpretation #setpointweight #weightflucuatiob #bekindtoyourself See more

15.01.2022 Childbirth: The Good and the Traumatic Its really common to be apprehensive towards the end of your pregnancy regarding what will happen during labour. You do your birth plan, and hope things will work out ideally. You might have clear ideas on what you do and dont want to happen. There are actually many more factors involved that determine what makes up a positive birth experience. The World Health Organisation [1] has identified the following variables as important for a ...Continue reading

14.01.2022 There’s no right or wrong way to feel when faced with the devastating prospect or news of infertility and the journey through IVF. However, there are some ste...ps that you can take to help you cope with these emotions, and reduce their potentially negative impact on you, your relationship and your life. https://www.cope.org.au///coping-with-feelings-that-arise/

13.01.2022 When things get hard... Put your energy into making small choices that take you towards feeling better, doing better, or your recovery. One small step each day towards your mental, emotional, social, or physical wellbeing grows over time, so that the better days start appearing more often.

13.01.2022 Pregnancy Myths For years, Ive worked with women regarding some of the difficulties faced in motherhood. And Ive noticed that there several myths or unhelpful beliefs that women can struggle with as they become mothers. These myths can come from the media, other people, and sometimes even ourselves. In pregnancy, there are several myths that Ive noticed, seen, or been told. These include: - Pregnancy is a happy time/You should enjoy your pregnancy... - Youll glow during your pregnancy - Every pregnancy is similar - Theres never a right time to have a baby; Or, there is a right time to have a baby - You should be happy to have a baby; their gender doesnt matter - Youll only grow a baby belly (and not gain weight anywhere else) - You need to bond with your baby bump - You should wait until 12 weeks to announce the pregnancy But of course, this list is just the tip of the iceberg. Im really curious about other myths that I have missed! If youve heard or experienced any other unhelpful beliefs regarding pregnancy, Id love it if you added these in the comments section. And for disclosure: I do hope to use the information to help mothers everywhere by writing a resource on the topic (in time).

12.01.2022 Most of us have heard of premenstrual syndrome: becoming irritable, anxious, or moody right before your monthly cycle. Some of us experience it, some of us dont. Some of us get it worse than others. And sometimes, these symptoms can be extreme, distressing, or impair your ability to go about your everyday life: in which case, it might be premenstrual dysphoria. Premenstrual dysphoria involves significant mood swings (such as suddenly crying for no reason, or being really sen...sitive), anger, low mood, anxiety, or tension. It may also involve: fatigue and lack of energy; difficulty concentrating; changes to appetite or sleep; losing interest in usual activities (like seeing friends or going to work); feeling overwhelmed; and physical symptoms like breast tenderness, bloating, or weight changes. These symptoms are often worst in the days before your period, and get better as your period progresses. If you find yourself getting marked symptoms and struggling in your life each month right before your period, it is worth noting which symptoms appear and when each month. This can help clarify if the issue is premenstrual dysphoria, premenstrual syndrome, or something else. You can do this with a checklist found here (https://www.aafp.org/afp/2011/1015/afp20111015p918-fig1.pdf) and taking the findings to your doctor or psychologist. Its good to record symptoms for at least a couple of months. And this is the part that might surprise you: research indicates that multiple treatments can help relieve significant premenstrual symptoms. These include medical intervention (such as medication), hormonal intervention (such as contraception), psychological therapy (specifically, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy), and there is even preliminary evidence that changing your diet can help. If premenstrual symptoms are a problem for you, try seeking holistic treatment through seeing your doctor, a psychologist, and dietitian.

11.01.2022 Fantastic news! The government is now increasing the number of medicare-subsidised psychology sessions from 10 per year to 20 per year.

11.01.2022 Telehealth update: Medicare funding is now available for telehealth sessions for anybody with a GP referral. You are also welcome to access privately funded telehealth sessions. Im currently offering both face to face and telehealth sessions. Ive been working from a new office in Nurture that allows us to sit 1.5 metres apart. Or you can choose to see this smiling face, and the dinosaurs on the ceiling, through a secure video call. Just let reception know your preference.... Kind wishes, Emma

10.01.2022 Today is International Women's Day. I have these cards in my office as they speak to my heart. I've dedicated my career to supporting women, as this is what matters to me. I love being part of something bigger than myself: The Sisterhood. When women support women, incredible things can and do happen. #internationalwomensday #IWD2021

10.01.2022 REACH IN During Perinatal Mental Health Week, as we share others' stories and talk about the facts and figures, we often say: "Don't be afraid to reach out i...f you need help?" But the reality is, not everyone is ready to "reach out" or even knows how to. And that means parents who need help continue to suffer in silence. But what if, as well as asking new and expectant parents to reach out, we, as a community, also reach IN. Instead of asking a new parent "let me know if there's anything I can do?", be the one who takes an older sibling to the park to give mum a break from the shock of managing a toddler and a newborn. Drop over a meal, or a coffee, or pay for a one-off cleaner. Ask the new parents in your life how they are and be prepared to listen, to help, if they admit they're struggling. Listen to and hear their silences. If a friend stops replying to messages or starts to withdraw, keep checking in. Even if they're not feeling up to responding, they'll always know you're there and that you didn't stop trying. Be the friend or relative who doesn't just hold the baby, but makes sure to hold the new mum, too. Reach in. Reach in. Reach in x For more information on how to start a conversation with someone you're concerned about, visit: https://www.cope.org.au//family-friends/concerned-someone/ Art by Caitlin Connelly #PerinatalMentalHealthWeek

10.01.2022 A quick message for International Womens Day. Ive seen and felt the power in the sisterhood. Women supporting women, backing other sisters, and raising each other up is a beautiful thing- we give each other strength, even when we are not feeling strong ourselves. And often, its the smallest things that count. Acknowledging that someone has had a hard time lately; offering to vacuum when they cant get themselves or baby dressed; bringing someone a coffee after a sleepless... night. One time a sister backed me was when I had a gastro, my husband was away, I had no supports, and being sick (into a bucket) whilst trying feed a one year old dinner. I asked my boss to help, and she dropped everything to come around to feed and bathe the baby so I could go live in the bathroom for awhile. And what a difference that made to me- I will never forget it. When has a sister helped you out? And how might you be able to back a sister? From a sister, Emma

09.01.2022 Managing the risk of parental burnout

09.01.2022 Today is Bereaved Mothers Day. Because you never stop being a mother, even if you lost your darling- no matter at what age or stage of pregnancy. One of the issues that bereaved mothers face is how people respond to their loss (or losses); the language used can hurt or support. Below is a helpful guide from Sands with some suggestions in this area. And, think about acknowledging your mates who have lost their babies- this can be so powerful for women suffering through grief in silence. Babies dont leave your heart, no matter how long it has been.

09.01.2022 Recovery from Eating Disorders Recovery from disordered eating is possible, although it can feel tough at times. While health professionals can view recovery in terms of symptom remission and reduction, this doesn’t capture what it is like for someone who has done the hard work to recover. A recent systematic review pooled research that examined recovery from people’s lived perspectives and what this involved (Wetzler, Hackmann, Peryer, et al, 2020). This review comprised 20 ...studies, with 351 participants with various eating disorder diagnoses in their history. Several key themes emerged as important for recovery: 1. Supportive relationships: Receiving support and encouragement from others, and feeling connected to other people. Peer support from people who had recovered also made a difference. 2. Hope: This is believing that it is possible to recover and to have a better future. A future not controlled by your eating disorder. This belief can help you push through when the going gets tough. 3. Identity: This is discovering who you really are, and what your interests are. And realising that you are not your eating disorder or your weight! 4. Meaning and purpose: This involves identifying why your eating disorder developed. It's also learning that there is more to life than your eating disorder; that you can have a purpose outside of this. 5. Empowerment: Regaining control over your life, rather than having it controlled by the eating disorder. 6. Self-compassion: Learning how to be kind to yourself. This can involve easing the self-criticism, practising self-care, and becoming aware of your needs and emotions (and honouring these). References Wetzler, S, Hackmann, C, Peryer, G, et al. (2020). A framework to conceptualize personal recovery from eating disorders: A systematic review and qualitative metasynthesis of perspectives from individuals with lived experience. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 53, 1188 1203. https://doi.org/10.1002/eat.232601.3.

08.01.2022 Mums, How many times have you had a thought like this: 'I'm a bad mother' 'I can't do this' 'I'm going to stuff my child up'... 'I'm not good enough as a mother' 'I'm failing'. I know I've had thoughts like these, and that many other women have too. When these thoughts appear, what happens for you? I'm willing to bet that you feel awful, anxious, upset, inadequate, ashamed, or guilty. And then it actually gets pretty hard to connect with your little person when you're caught in negative thoughts and feelings, so you beat yourself up some more. It's also hard to enjoy your life or motherhood when these thoughts and feelings show up. I've created a brief exercise to help you stand back from one of these painful thoughts. See it in a new way, and hopefully take some of the sting out of it. This is called 'Cognitive Defusion'. If you are in your head less, then you are more able to enjoy your life and connect with those around you. It's 4.5 minutes of your life. It's a visualisation. And it's free. You can find it here: https://townsvillepsychologist.com.au/offerings/ just scroll down to the exercise called 'Defusion for Mothers'. Kind wishes, Emma

08.01.2022 Its really common, and frightening, to have intrusive thoughts regarding something bad happening to your baby.

08.01.2022 When you fall pregnant, it is often a time of speculation about whether you’re having a boy or a girl. You might be excited to find out what you’re having through ultrasound or wait to find out at birth. You get asked what you’re having. And even if you choose not to share this information, people will guess for you. They might do this based on pregnancy symptoms such as carrying high or low, morning sickness, the type of food cravings you’re having, and more. And sometimes,... you just know or have a feeling about whether you’re having a boy or girl. One interesting study explored whether a woman's intuition regarding their baby’s gender was correct or not (McFadzen, Dielentheis, Kasten, Singh, & Grundle, 2017). Women attending an obstetrics clinic for ultrasound were asked if they had a feeling about their baby’s gender; 411 women (40%) said they did. Their prediction was compared to their ultrasound results. The findings? Mum’s intuition predicted gender correctly 51% of the time. The study noted that women who reported a strong intuition did a bit better (correctly predicting baby’s gender 62% of the time). Still, this outcome was not a significant improvement (statistically). The study’s authors concluded that intuition performed the same as guessing or flipping a coin. Did you have a feeling about your baby’s gender? Were you right or wrong? I did- and I got it wrong! #pregnancy #pregnancyfacts #babyintuition References McFadzen, M., Dielentheis, D. P., Kasten, R., Singh, M., & Grundle, J. (2017). Maternal Intuition of Fetal Gender. Journal of patient-centered research and reviews, 4, 125-130. doi:10.17294/2330-0698.1454

06.01.2022 Guided skills practice from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is now freely available. Practice mindfulness, accepting difficult emotions, and more. As below:

06.01.2022 Being a therapist is a gift that Im grateful for every day. What I love most about my job is connecting with people, helping them change, and being kept on my toes. No two days, or even two hours, are the same in my job. You connect with someones heartbreak. Then youre pissing yourself laughing with someone over something completely ridiculous. You find yourself concerned about another person.... Then youre feeling so proud of someone and all they have achieved that you could burst. Next, youre chiselling hard around all the thoughts and beliefs that are keeping someone stuck- hoping to create some wiggle room for them to get out of their rut. And then someone educates you about something new, and youre curious as anything. Over one day, I go on an emotional rollercoaster, up and down, and all around. But... Im open to feeling all the feelings, and there is a purpose to this rollercoaster. One of the ways to create movement for people is through empathy- connecting with their emotions and where they are at, and then encouraging them forward towards their goals. And because Im open to feeling all the emotions, these dont actually bother me or cause problems. Being open to your feelings means they are free to come and go (as they are meant to), and you dont get stuck in them. It is such a privilege that people feel comfortable enough to share their stories and difficulties with me. Thank you for taking me on this ride every day.

06.01.2022 Sometimes you have your heart set on having a boy or girl baby; and it can cause disappointment if youre having a different gender to what youd imagined. This blog outlines some ways to help manage this disappointment- its more common than what you might think.

05.01.2022 Becoming a mother is challenging! If you have unhelpful expectations regarding early motherhood, this can cause extra stress. Being aware of these unhelpful myths can help alleviate unnecessary pressures. Read more in the blog below.

05.01.2022 Once eating disorders start, they become self-maintaining, which is why it is so hard to break free of them on your own. This blog outlines a model explaining how eating disorders start and the vicious cycles that keep them going.

05.01.2022 Last week I had the pleasure of presenting with Dr Emily Mills on our webinar: Wellbeing in Lockdown. Thank you so much for your support, and we hope it was helpful. For those who missed it, or would like to re-watch it, the link and password are below. We cover skills to help manage feeling lost, stressed, and lonely; just some of the impacts felt during lockdown. https://us02web.zoom.us//x-8tbKzWq0FOe42Q82yPa6UkBobGeaa8g ... Password: 9m..ZK^&

04.01.2022 The confusing part about depression When you're physically sick, your body needs rest to fight off germs and heal. You can feel run down, exhausted, or unable to do much when you're sick, so you don't. And when you push yourself to do things, it can be draining and make you feel depleted or worse. It's a pretty simple formula: when you get sick (or injured), you rest to recover/heal. When you're depressed, the symptoms can be quite physical too. Feeling lethargic, tired, and ...like everything is effortful; on top of changes in sleep, eating, and more. So it makes sense that when you feel like you're physically struggling due to depression, you would rest and do less to recover. And here is the confusing part: if you feel awful and tired because you're depressed and then take the time to rest or do less, you won't get better. Resting actually maintains that lack of energy, so that the depression will either worsen or be maintained. The irony is that doing things (particularly physical activity) will improve your energy levels, rather than depleting them. It can feel overwhelming or too hard to consider doing things, like housework, seeing friends, exercising, or working. So what can you do? Remind yourself that something is better than nothing, and set small daily goals to kick-start your recovery. For example, if it is too hard to do the dishes: set a timer and just do what you can in 10 minutes, rather than trying to wash all of the dishes. If it feels too hard to exercise, aim small: walk to the end of the street and back, or around the block. If seeing friends is too hard: why not try responding to one or two text messages that have been left unanswered. If it feels too hard to work or study: set a timer again and do what you can in 20 minutes. When you start doing things, several things happen. One, it improves your energy levels and motivation. Two, you gain momentum- getting started is often the problem, but it gets easier to do more and other things when you do get started. Three, you get opportunities for that low or flat mood to change- and there often is some improvement, even if slight. And finally: you get proof that you're not useless, worthless or all the other nasty things that your mind is telling you, which also serves to start weakening the depression. When you're sick, resting gets you back on track. When you're depressed, doing things (however small) will help give you the energy and motivation to get back on track. It can be hard work, but well worth doing.

03.01.2022 Meaning & Purpose Viktor E. Frankl was a Jewish psychiatrist who wrote a famous book, Mans Search for Meaning. In this book, he chronicled his experiences and observations regarding his time as a prisoner in Nazi concentration camps (which included imprisonment at Auschwitz). He observed that people who had a sense of purpose or meaning in their lives were better able to endure in these shocking conditions. Frankl put forward that there are three main types of meaning: - T...o create something or undertake an endeavour. An example outlined was Frankls book that he was writing. - To experience something, or have contact with someone; for example, Frankl wrote about the love he had for his wife. - The attitude taken towards suffering experienced. Frankl suggested that the only freedom you might actually have at times is to choose your attitude, and that meaning or purpose can be found in suffering. It can be worth reflecting on where you find meaning in your life. Is it in your relationships, in being a partner, parent, friend, or other? Do you undertake work that is meaningful to you? Do you create- art, poetry, or something else? What do you tell yourself about the pain or suffering in your life? Your thoughts about pain can increase suffering, or build resilience; and this may be one of the few things inside your control when situations cant be changed. It can also help to explore your thoughts regarding your suffering in therapy, if youd like to start writing a different narrative that supports survival, and possibly even growth.

03.01.2022 Every day, I get to work with amazing women. My wonderful colleagues. And the people I spend the most time with each day: the women who visit my office to share their lives, stories, and pain. It takes courage to pour your heart out and face your pain. It takes courage to trust someone else to see your pain and not judge you for it. Therapy can be challenging. And when you've been seeing a therapist for a while, you develop trust and have a fair idea of how they'll react. Bu...t that first time you walk through the door: There's little idea what I'm like, how I'll respond, or what you can expect from me. It requires a leap of faith to bare your soul to a stranger, which is why therapy feels daunting the first time- but gets easier. I see you, the amazing women who trust with me with your pain: You are braver and stronger than you realise. Strength isn't about feeling strong- it's about making hard decisions, persevering through adversity, and trying to do what needs to be done. And every so often I think to myself, how lucky am I that I get to work with these amazing women each week. Thank you. See more

03.01.2022 Funny and true! I couldnt resist sharing this one.

03.01.2022 Psychology Telehealth Psychology is available via telehealth (video conference or phone call). The government has informed that if you have a mental health care plan (GP referral) and meet certain criteria, you can access medicare funded psychology sessions. This includes the following: Pregnant women... Parents of a baby under 12 months old People with a chronic medical condition or compromised immune system People who have coronavirus or required to be under quarantine Indigenous people over 50 years old People over 70 years old Some of these criteria describe many of my clients. If you would like to change your appointment to a video or phone consult, please contact Nurtures reception on 4721 1759 to notify of this. You are also welcome to arrange telehealth even if you do not meet Medicare criteria for this. There are options: sessions can be privately funded; and some funding organisations have agreed to support telehealth. If you have any questions about this, please feel free to discuss with reception (4721 1759).

03.01.2022 It can be hard to feel good in times of stress, anxiety, or depression- positive feelings typically decrease when these are present. The irony is that having windows of feeling good can help you cope with stress, and facilitate recovery from anxiety and depression. Sometimes you have to actively work on cultivating positive emotions- which doesnt always occur to us to do! It is possible to create more positive emotions by undertaking positive experiences. Each day, consider ...what positive or pleasant activity you can do that has the opportunity to either create joy, or at least help you feel less miserable, stressed, or worried. This can look different for different people. Consider what things you have enjoyed doing in the past or have made you feel good doing... Like yoga, reading a good book, talking to someone you care about- the list could go on and on. Ask yourself each day: What can I do today to create the opportunity for joy? If this feels like too big an ask, then ask yourself what you can do that might make you feel better. Do it for half an hour, and see if your feelings shift in a more positive direction. When you bring a conscious intention to find your joy each day, it is more likely to happen. You might be surprised to discover that over time, not only can you find your joy, but that you can create it. Today, Im planning to find my joy in mucking around on the trampoline. I sincerely hope you do something to find yours.

02.01.2022 Your best wont always look the same - and thats OK. Via @theburntoutbrain

02.01.2022 Summarise your thesis down to one sentence and it sounds ridiculous... Years of work oversimplified to the point of hilarity. My thesis summary: People who have both self-harm and disordered eating have more problems than people who have only of these behaviours, or none of these behaviours. ... #lolmythesis

01.01.2022 Military wives and partners I have a soft spot for military wives. I’ve been one myself.... I remember when I agreed to marry my soldier, thinking to myself that I was also agreeing to no longer have control over my life. Where I lived, how much time I had with my husband, whether he was contactable when away, and not being close to family or friends. At times it was fine, and at other times it wasn't. I’ve been the wife trying to keep my husband home when I needed him- but some things count, and some things don’t. I’ve been the wife losing it about being supposed to move one week after giving birth. I’ve moved, set up a life, moved again, set up a life. Weighed up whether to go unaccompanied, or not. Lived without supports. Kept things running when he’s away. Left jobs and friends I loved. The reality is, is that being a military wife or spouse can be hard, lonely, and lacking support at times. And not to mention there can be consistent uncertainty (or changes) about what is happening for your soldier, when, and for how long. Throw parenting into the mix and it gets tougher. This post is a shout out to the military wives and partners. It’s tough, but you are doing it, every single day. Know some of the supports available to you: - Defence Family Helpline 1800 624 609. They can provide a range of supports, which are well worth looking into. - Open Arms 1800 011 046 provide free counselling to families, available on an ongoing basis or as-needed through their 24 hour phone line