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Human Bean Counselling

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25.01.2022 Without decent sleep, optimum mental health is extremely challenging, if not impossible. No need to make pacts with the dark side - prioritise sleep and many other problems will shrink to a size that you can face. One effective method is to develop a sleep routine. Work out the earliest time you need to wake up all week, and make this your new default waking time. Subtract 9-10 hours from this and make that the time you set an alarm to put your mobile phone on a charger ...in a separate room from where you sleep. Stop all screentime at that point and start your wind-down routine. Two hours after that is when you'll be in bed. I'd love to hear your routine and how you wind down before sleep. . . . #anxietyproblems #mentalhealthawarenessmonth #anxietyawareness #anxietywarrior #sleeptight #anxietyfree #depressionhelp #anxietyhelp #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealthawarenessweek #mentalhealthtips #sleepless #insomniac #depressionisreal #postpartumdepression #mentalhealthadvocate #depressionawareness #insomnia #mentalhealthmatters #anxietyrelief #sleeptime #sleepytime #sleepwell #anxietyrecovery #anxietysupport #depressionsupport #sleeproutine #psychotherapy

25.01.2022 Self-care continues to be our home-work. It is the foundation for our inner home of love, compassion, kindness, and insight. From this base we are better prepar...ed to help others. It all starts at home. Helping others has vast implications. It not only helps others, but is the best medicine for caring for ourself. We move beyond empathy to compassion. Beyond being too close and adopting others’ pain, to a half step back emotionally, while keeping our heart open. Not only does this protect us from empathy fatigue, it also increases our perspective to make better decisions and help more effectively. Emaho! See more

25.01.2022 The tension is rising for lots of people - it's a perfect storm in many ways. Patience is wearing thin and filters are less existent. Pay attention to your internal cues, physical and mental, and make time to step away and recalibrate when you need to. Thank you @wisdomofanxiety for this insightful post.... . . . #irritated #relationshipstress #relationships #anxietysupport #angermanagement #tired #exhausted #highlysensitiveperson #anxious #stressed #burnout #personalspace #reflection #shadowwork #pandemic #actingout

24.01.2022 A depressed brain may complain to you that it's "sad" to celebrate small victories, but a healthy state of mind knows that this is actually one way to stop and even turn around a negative spiral. Maybe you haven't done as much as someone else today, but you're not in competition with them, you're on a journey to becoming the healthiest and happiest person you can be - one step at a time. What small victory can you celebrate today? . .... . #depressionawareness #psychotherapy #depressionhelp #mentalhealthjourney #smallvictories #mentalhealthday #chronicfatigue #postpartumdepression #depressionsupport #depressionisreal #mentalhealthisimportant #mentalhealthtips #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealthquotes #counselling #onestepatatime #mentalhealthsupport See more

23.01.2022 I checked this out, and apparently these really are Charles Darwin's own words. The amazing explorer and scientist didn't have the benefit of #CBT back then to be able to notice how many cognitive distortions he was experiencing - he suffered terribly throughout his life with #anxiety (especially #healthanxiety), #depression, #grief, #panicdisorder and was known to be a #highlysensitiveperson. Some of the greatest people in history have struggled with their mental health. I...t's not a sign of weakness - in fact it takes great strength to face life with these additional challenges. Thank goodness we have come far enough that the stigma is decreasing. . . . #buddhistcounselling #counselling #anxietyrelief #shame #socialanxiety #mentalhealthsupport #anxietyhelp #anxietyawareness #anxietysupport #anxietysucks #mentalhealthstigma #depressionsupport #depressionawareness #personcentredcounselling #counsellingonline #courageousliving See more

23.01.2022 How's your sleep? Are you aware of the link between anxiety disorders and poor sleep? This article has some ideas to help. "Anxiety causes sleeping problems, and new research suggests sleep deprivation can cause an anxiety disorder. Research also shows that some form of sleep disruption is present in nearly all psychiatric disorders. Studies also show that people with chronic insomnia are at high risk of developing an anxiety disorder."

23.01.2022 Michael J Fox on what he has learned through facing his serious health issues: Optimism is sustainable when you keep coming back to gratitude, and what follows from that is acceptance accepting that this thing has happened, and you accept it for what it is, he said. It doesn’t mean that you can’t endeavour to change.... It doesn’t mean you have to accept it as a punishment or a penance, but just put it in its proper place. Then see how much the rest of your life you have to thrive in, and then you can move on.

23.01.2022 "For Courage" When the light around you lessens And your thoughts darken until Your body feels fear turn... Cold as a stone inside When you find yourself bereft Of any belief in yourself And all you unknowingly Leaned on has fallen When one voice commands Your whole heart, And it is raven dark, Steady yourself and see That is is your own thinking That darkens your world Search and you will find A diamond-thought of light, Know that you are not alone And that this darkness has purpose Gradually it will school your eyes To find the one gift your life requires Hidden within this night-corner. Invoke the learning Of every suffering You have suffered. Close your eyes Gather all the kindling About your heart To create one spark. That is all you need To nourish the flame That will cleanse the dark Of its weight of festered fear. A new confidence will come alive To urge you towards higher ground Where your imagination Will learn to engage difficulty As its most rewarding threshold! ~ John O’ Donohue

22.01.2022 As well as providing for our children physically, we owe it to them to create as much mental health and peace within ourselves as we can. Doing our own work is not selfish but an essential gift to the next generation - and everyone else in our lives.

22.01.2022 "So when I see a student failing to complete assignments, missing deadlines, or not delivering results in other aspects of their life, I’m moved to ask: what are the situational factors holding this student back? What needs are currently not being met? And, when it comes to behavioral laziness, I’m especially moved to ask: what are the barriers to action that I can’t see? There are always barriers. Recognizing those barriers and viewing them as legitimate is often the first step to breaking lazy behavior patterns." https://humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27

21.01.2022 "Romanticism has been a disaster for our relationships. It is an intellectual and spiritual movement which has had a devastating impact on the ability of ordinary people to lead successful emotional lives. The salvation of love lies in overcoming a succession of errors within Romanticism. Our strongest cultural voices have to our huge cost set us up with the wrong expectations. They’ve highlighted emotions that don’t tell us very much that’s useful about how to make relat...ionships work while drawing attention away from others that offer more constructive guidance. We deserve sympathy. We’re surrounded by a culture that offers a well-meaning but fatally skewed ideal of how relationships might function. We’re trying to apply a very unhelpful script to a hugely tricky task." Contrary to a major theme of Romanticism, "realising that we are rather flawed, and our partner is too, is of huge benefit to a couple increasing the amount of tolerance and generosity in circulation."

21.01.2022 Wishing you peace and happiness this Christmas. . . . .... . . . #christmaswishes #happychristmas #merrychristmas #mentalhealthcheckin #counsellingsupport #counselling #letitbeginwithme #peaceofmind #peaceonearth #innerpeace

21.01.2022 Is relentless positivity serving you well? Or are you trying to bypass the pain and grief which we as humans inevitably encounter? What if, instead, you were able to sit with difficult experiences and allow them to "cook" you as a person? Today I'm sharing this insightful interview from colleague Jodie Gale .

21.01.2022 Nelson Mandela, who was imprisoned for 27 years before finally becoming the first black president of South Africa and defeating apartheid, once said: "I never lose. I either win or I learn". You are allowed to create your own labels for experiences, and in that reframing you transform both your mindset and the outcome. What have you learned?... . . . #reframeyourthoughts #psychotherapy #win #feelings #fail #learn #growthmindset #positivemindset #mindsetiseverything #failure #epicfail #mindsetmatters #lovefailure #mindsetshift #successfulmindset #healthymindset #mindsetquotes #feelingsquotes #learner #failfriday #mindsetcoaching #mindsetchange #learntoloveyourself #learnfromyourmistakes #feelingstuck

20.01.2022 "You can’t stop mental chaos, however motivated you are. But if you identify one piece of chaos and stabilize it, then the whole world begins to make sense. So... I'd write the thought down and question it. Sometimes I'd sit for an hour, sometimes for a morning and afternoon-however long it took to meet the thought with understanding. I could always see that the thought wasn't true, that it was an erroneous assumption." - Byron Katie See more

20.01.2022 This message to protect your time is important for everyone, but if you are a #highlysensitiveperson or suffer from #anxiety then it's crucial you take measures to guard your non-work hours and use them in ways that genuinely rejuvenate, recreate and refresh yourself. . . . .... @miamingus @burningthecouch #repost #psychotherapy #selfcareeveryday #mentalhealth #selfcarehacks #selfcaredaily #selfcaretip #workworkwork #timemanagement #selfcarefirst #highfunctioninganxiety #selfcareisntselfish #workday #selfcarecoach #selfcareroutine #workingmom #selfcaresunday #worklife #selfcaretips #selfcarelove #burnout #workhardplayharder #selfcarethreads #selfcarematters #selfcarethread #counselling See more

20.01.2022 There's some overlap, but being kind and being nice are not the same thing - and that applies to the way we treat ourselves as much as the way we treat others. In Buddhist thought, kindness is seen as the wish for beings (including oneself) to be free from suffering. However, it takes courage and wisdom to accurately see what is required in a situation and then to make that happen. Real kindness can be challenging and sometimes it might not feel or appear "nice", such as whe...n you stick to a challenging exercise plan to improve your health, set behavioural limits for an angry child, or perhaps stand up against systemic injustice. That's ok - kindness and niceness are not the same thing. Kindness is born out of a genuine concern for another's well-being, and the readiness to do what helps. Niceness, on the other hand, might be about not rocking the boat, craving others' approval, and avoiding becoming the target of their displeasure. There's a significant risk with niceness that you may end up feeling like a martyr - you've given someone (or yourself) everything they want but nothing that they need. . . . #selfkindness #kindness #blm #kindnessmatters #boundaries #spreadkindness #choosekindness #lovingkindness #healthyboundaries #blmmovement #actsofkindness #kindnessquotes #setboundaries #martyr #buddhistcounselling #crosscultural #inclusion #socialjustice

20.01.2022 It might sound counter-intuitive, but being of service to others is a crucial part of looking after ourselves. The way we treat others (kindly or otherwise) physically alters our brains as well as contributes to the story we tell ourselves about our identity and worth. There's good science behind the idea that practising acts of kindness (with no strings attached) makes us happier and increases our wellbeing. Make an investment in your future happiness today and share below ...something kind you've done recently. #repost @_theself_carekit @myeasytherapy @make_repost @rakfoundation #psychotherapy #selfcarematters #selfcompassion #rak #randomactsofkindness #makeadifference #selfcareroutine #choosecompassion #selfcarehacks #bodhisattva #compassion #selfcaretip #selfcaretips #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealthjourney #compassionateliving #counseling #mondaymotivation

19.01.2022 Sometimes the saying "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" can help you keep going - and at other times the mere thought of any more suffering can be enough to tip you over the edge. If you have been strong on your own for too long, it's possible you've drained your inner resources in the process. When you're at the point where you feel like you can't take any more, it can help to have an ally in a counsellor - someone who will listen to your story without judgement or b...ias, and who will keep it safe. Sometimes a dark sense of humour helps too. . . . . #repost with thanks @classical_art_memes_official #whatdoesntkillyoumakesyoustronger #exhausted #stressed #fearchronic #anxietysupport #anxietytips #anxietyhelp #anxietysucks #anxietyhealing #anxiety #burnout #overwhelmed #overwhelmedbylife #doomscrolling #anxietyanddepression #counsellingsupport #counsellor #therapy #psychotherapy #buddhistcounselling #fear #strongwomen #strong #innerstrength

18.01.2022 Wouldn't it be strange if we called a baby a failure? Yet trying and failing is what they do all day long. That's how they grow. In fact, as we become mentally healthier, in a way we may become more like babies - learning all the time, trying new things without preconceptions, and making mistakes freely, without shame or fear of failure. Can you challenge yourself to get a little of that "newness" back in your life today?... . . . #mentalhealthjourney #mentalhealth #anxiety #depression #psychotherapy #counselling #beginnersmind #zen #babies #highlysensitiveperson #highfunctioninganxiety #failure #mistakes #nofear Photo credit @marslady See more

18.01.2022 If you're looking for a great holiday podcast about happiness, you'll get a lot out of this one: "Gawdat is the former chief business officer at Google X...but for a long time in his life, despite having professional, personal and material success, he realised he wasn't happy. So he set about solving this problem by applying his scientific research skills to the issue: how can one individual be happy?" https://podcasts.google.com/... @elizabday #solveforhappy

18.01.2022 When you pick an activity to reduce your stress, make sure it fulfills the following five criteria. The more it does, the more relaxed you'll feel. Psychological detachment: Fully disconnecting during non-work time from work-related tasks or even thinking about work issues Relaxation: Being free of tension and anxiety... Mastery: Challenging situations that provide a sense of progress and achievement (such as being in learning mode to develop a new skill) Control: Deciding yourself about what to do and when and how to do it Enjoyment: The state or process of deriving pleasure from seeing, hearing or doing something.

17.01.2022 Here's the thing - arguing with someone set in their ways never changed their mind (and that goes double for social media). But it sure is an effective way to disturb our own minds. Do you ever fall into this trap? Letting go of this habit might free up quite a bit of mental space (and time). This can then be directed into (a) developing the internal qualities that we wish to see in the outside world and (b) sending those individuals compassion (from a distance if necessa...ry). . . . . #bethechange #counselling #therapy #choosecompassion #bethechangeyouwanttoseeintheworld #compassionateliving #compassionate #bethechangeyouwanttosee #upset #selfcompassion #argument #highlysensitiveperson #sensitivity #selfkindness #selfcare #bekindtoyourself #bekindtoyourmind See more

17.01.2022 Loneliness is spreading along with the pandemic, but we might not notice it happening until it's started to interfere with everyday life. That sense of emptiness, daytime tiredness, or of being unwanted could even be thwarting our attempts at connection. Counselling can help you make a plan to move forward to a genuinely happier future. #feelingalone #alonetime #counselling #alonequotes #connection #leavemealone #neveralone #painful #humanconnection #foreveralone #homealone #youarenotalone #shame #psychotherapy #notalone # #youllneverwalkalone #lonelyquotes #allalone #aloneforever #brokenhearts #youwillneverwalkalone

17.01.2022 Anxiety tries so hard to keep us safe from an uncertain future, but in unquestioningly obeying its constant demands our lives can get progressively smaller and smaller - yet ultimately not any safer. . . . .... #anxiety #searchforsafety #anxietylies #fear #tired #exhausted #highlysensitiveperson #counselling #support #thomasmerton #quotestoliveby #anxietyquote #stress #stressed #peace #uncertainty #tuesdaythoughts

14.01.2022 If you’d like to try using hypnosis to help with your personal development or healing but you’re not sure who to trust or where to start, this resource might be useful. https://humanbeancounselling.com/could-hypnosis-help-me/

14.01.2022 Do you ever feel like this guy? Give yourself some appreciation for always trying so hard in the face of overwhelming odds. How amazing that you never give up. Yet what if you were to notice the difference between what can't be changed and what *can*? What would happen if you focused your energy there instead?... . . . #serenityprayer #peace #overwhelm #anxiety #burnout #newchoices #healing #innerpeace

13.01.2022 Gosh it's amazing how often counsellors hear about situations like this. Attracted to the "opposite" qualities in a partner which complement our own, what could possibly go wrong? At first those aspects seemed so appealing, but with familiarity the same qualities really start to cause some friction (or explosions, as in the case of this perfect illustration by @lucaslevitan) One of the keys to creating great relationships is learning to create loving boundaries - this ill...ustration shows so clearly how they are an essential act of self-care, and also how they make love possible. . . . . #conflict #oppositesattract #boundaries #highlysensitiveperson #noboundaries #psychotherapy #relationshipstatus #healthyrelationships #counselling #love #relationshipsbelike #relationshipsgoals #relationships101 #healthyboundaries #toxicrelationships #buildingrelationships #relationshipmatters #psychotherapy #relationshipproblems #relationshipgoal #relationshiptips #relationshipsbelike #spreadlovenothate #relationshipadvice

11.01.2022 Does this description of the journey of grief at the loss of a loved one resonate for you also? Grief isn't something we just "get over". Rather its purpose is to encourage us to remember our love, and to eventually come to accept our loss. . .... . @peacefulmindpeacefullife #repost #griefandlosssupport #soulguidance #griefpoetry #griefawareness #loss #grief #counselling #innerguidance #griefsupport #griefjourney #tagify_app #babyloss #griefandloss #griefquotes #griefsucks #griefrecovery #lossofalovedone #onlinecounselling #griefwork #griefislove #grieftherapy See more

11.01.2022 A healing, grounding practice: "There is another additional practice I learned from a Native American teacher. In this practice you dig a small hole in the earth with your hands. Then ask permission to give the Earth your sorrow. Then say, shout, or weep into the hole until you have let go of everything. Then seal the hole by covering it over with earth. Then press your hands down and see all your grief, anger and hurt being taken away by Mother Earth, feeling deep gratitude for all she holds." ~ Lama Tsultrim Allione

11.01.2022 "A life, if lived well, is long enough". What lesson can you take for your own life from this poignant essay?

08.01.2022 If you're feeling lonely right now, you're not...well...alone. On the other hand, you might not quite have noticed what had snuck up on you. Either way, there's some great ideas for action in here. "People assume, when it comes to friendship, [that] it happens organically, Dr. Franco says. But what the research finds is that the more you think friendship happens organically, the more lonely you’re going to end up being. So what I really suggest is to make an effort and take a lot of initiative [with] people that are in your network already.

08.01.2022 Good relationships are not ones where there is no conflict but ones where conflict is resolved in a proper manner. People are less likely to feel attacked and ...are more open to conflict resolution when we complain about a particular situation rather than criticise their actions and nature. When done correctly, the negative connotation to complaining can be replaced with making it a useful form of communication for healthy relationships. #mindmantra #conflictresolution #relationshipgoals #relationships #relationshipquotes #couplegoals #couplestherapy #therapy #bpdrecovery #bpd #angermanagement #mentalhealth #anxiety

08.01.2022 Dealing with a passive aggressive relationship in your life? Here are some tips. 1) Accept the reality of the situation and understand (with as much empathy as you can muster) the reasons why people might try to get their way using passive aggressive means.... 2) Stay calm, kind and assertive. Resist the temptation to argue, or you will get sucked into the other person's vortex and be blamed for what follows. 3) You cannot force someone else to change, but you can teach them what you will accept through your own behaviour. Take care not to enable poor treatment. 4) Set boundaries using "I" statements. You only have control over your own behaviour. Establish consequences and follow them through. 5) Pay attention to your own passive aggression too. People who dislike conflict often end up in relationships with others who are the same. Do you need to learn to express your own feelings openly also? . . . . @dadsaysjokes #repost #relationshipsuccess #assertiveness #lovingkindness #relationshipsbelike #boundaries #selfcompassion #counselling #toxicrelationships #healthyrelationships #choosekindness #healthyboundaries #relationshipsgoals #relationships101 #buildingrelationships #selfkindness #setboundaries #consciousrelationships #settingboundaries #relationshipsupport

08.01.2022 The reason it hurts so much is that instead of keeping the pain "clean", we layer suffering over our suffering by trying to mentally fight the pain or avoid it (in all kinds of unhealthy ways). This "dirty" pain is what can lead us to mental health problems. It doesn't have to be this way. We can practise accepting reality, observing the mental stories we tell ourselves, defusing them, and in so doing, release ourselves from unnecessary suffering. . .... . #mentalhealthquotes #acceptanceandcommitmenttherapy #sufferingisoptional #freedom #suffering #endmysuffering #highlysensitiveperson #nomoresuffering #buddhistcounselling #acceptance #observe #accept #stories #storiesofmylife #anxietyanddepression #anxiety See more

07.01.2022 I love this so much.

07.01.2022 I'm always suggesting to clients to get themselves a journal (or a journalling app, although there's something special about putting a physical pen to paper) and start writing down their thoughts, feelings and experiences. There are an endless variety of techniques we can explore together. Getting the words out of your head and on to paper can take such a weight off your mind by externalising the thoughts running through your head. When written down, they can be seen and deal...t with instead of scampering around like obnoxious monkeys. Journalling might help you extend the time you need between counselling sessions, and can make the sessions you do have even more productive because you already know what you want to cover. . . . . . @_mindfullyfresh @justagirlproject #repost #diary #journaling #craftastherapy #clearmind #tagify_app #arttherapy #creativejournal #bulletjournals #psychotherapy #journals #bulletjournaling #journaling #artjournal #counselling #cbt #gratitudejournal #journalinspiration #lovediary #journaladdict #journalling #anxietysupport #anxiety #mentalhealth #metime

07.01.2022 Welcome and thanks for dropping by! My name's Robyn and I'm a PACFA certified counsellor and registered teacher offering a *fully online* individual counselling service by private video link and email messaging. I have a passion for helping people with the following concerns. If any of these align with where you're at right now, please be sure to drop me a line. ... * Developing self-compassion and emotional resilience to face the hard times * Working out what you really want and creating a plan to make it happen * Creating accountability for new habits and goals * Exploring meaning, purpose and spirituality * Cross-cultural and migrant/ex-pat issues * Helping HSP (Highly Sensitive People) to manage anxiety in an over-stimulated world * EFT Tapping

07.01.2022 Do you recognise yourself in this list? If so, you may well be what is recognised as a "Highly Sensitive Person". Yes, it's real - you weren't imagining your sensitivity and you're not weak, just different. Our sensitivity has evolutionary advantages. Making up twenty percent of the population, #HSP are much like the canary down the mine - we have sensitive nervous systems and, for better or for worse, are more easily overwhelmed and overstimulated by our environment. Recogn...ising this is the first step in learning how to cope, thrive, and actually uncover the gifts that sensitivity brings. . . . @realisedempath #repost #noisesensitivity #counsellingandpsychotherapy #psychotherapy #hsp #overwhelmed #sensitivity #overwhelming #highlysensitiveperson #overwhelm #hsp #hypersensitivity #hspcoach #overstimulation #overwhelmedbylife #onlinepsychotherapy #sensitivityisastrength #highlysensitivepersontribe #sensitivityisstrength #counselling #empath See more

06.01.2022 Grab a journal before the end of the year and explore these questions... With thanks to @nedratawwab

06.01.2022 Way too clever not to share. Take a screenshot and find your affirmation of the day. What is yours? @the.wiesuite @make_repost @headhearttherapy #repost #counsellor #affirmations #highlysensitiveperson #affirmationsoftheday #healingvibrations #mentalhealthsupport #dailyaffirmations #positiveaffirmations #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthjourney #mentalhealthisimportant #wordoftheday #mentalhealthquotes #healingjourney #healingenergy #mentalhealthmatters #affirmation #mentalhealthrecovery

06.01.2022 "One of the real challenges is we haven't had any real respite from it," she said. "Fatigue comes from a number of factors and emotional fatigue is a very real condition."

05.01.2022 If overthinking and stressing about a problem was a solution to anything, it would have worked (for someone) by now. Rumination is a nasty head trick - you and I both know it doesn't work. But recognising when we're doing it and acknowledging its futility is a very helpful first step in allowing those thoughts to move on naturally and finding solutions that really work. . .... . #stressbusters #anxietyreliever #stressreduction #fear #stressedout #anxiety #stress #stressrelief #anxietyrelief #fatigue #anxietyhelp #worry #overthinking #stressmanagement #counselling #anxietysupport #rumination #anxietyrecovery #panicattack #anxietysucks #stressrelieving #fearisaliar #overcominganxiety #anxietytips #stressing #fearchronic See more

04.01.2022 This research suggests that decision fatigue exists - but only if you believe it does. Which category do you belong to - does your willpower evaporate if you use it too much, or do you see it as a muscle that gets stronger with use?

03.01.2022 Is there a substitute for human touch during the pandemic? http://humanbeancounselling.com/how-to-stay-happy-and-heal/

02.01.2022 Kindness can make it possible to go on when it previously seemed impossible. Have you experienced a moment like this during a dark time? Could you offer kindness this week - to another person, or to yourself? Thank you, Kindness Factory!

01.01.2022 "Writing more generally about unwanted habits of all kinds, Chodron says the urge to engage in old habits comes from a misguided attempt to escape discomfort, or what she calls "heated states": "We want to do these things because in that heated state we believe it will bring us some relief. Some kind of satisfaction or resolution or comfort will result: we think we'll feel better at the end. But what if we paused and asked ourselves, "Will I feel better when this is over?"