Julia Souter Counselling & Psychotherapy in Avalon, New South Wales, Australia | Medical and health

Julia Souter Counselling & Psychotherapy

Locality: Avalon, New South Wales, Australia

Phone: +61 419 995 447

Address: Avalon 2107 Avalon, NSW, Australia

Website: http://juliasouter.com

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20.01.2022 The ability to check out our own thinking and question ourselves is surely one of the most important exercises we can do for our mental health and well being. In a world where so much of what we think and believe is a product of that which we have absorbed by osmosis; socioculturally / in the media / from our families of origin etc, it is crucial that we learn to think for ourselves, ask questions, broaden our perspectives... that means putting our assumptions and beliefs to the test on a regular basis! Otherwise we are likely to keep buying into a dubious set of values, peddled by a social media which all too often seems to reward the most superficial values and an economy whose interest lies in making money off your insecurities. Question everything.. curiosity towards all things will keep you openminded, sane and probably happier.

19.01.2022 On the importance of integrity and being your real / true self.. Too many people spend years trying to be whom they think they ‘should’ be or behaving in ways they think are expected of them ... Often we learn these roles early and base our personalities on what is deemed acceptable by others, either in our families, peer group or society.. Yet playing a role and/or hiding our actual needs (even for the noblest of reasons) usually drains us of our energy and ultimately leads to unhappiness..

19.01.2022 It is in those moments that we share our truth with others and acknowledge our shared pains that comfort spreads and real intimacy can grow.. and that’s a beautiful thing..

18.01.2022 As people become more and more attached and addicted to their screens, make no mistake, there is NO substitute for face to face interaction with another person.. so don’t kid yourself that you are more connected by having a thousand friends on Facebook or followers on Instagram.. levels of anxiety and depression and suicide are on the rise everywhere in the digital age.

18.01.2022 It’s ALL about perspective.. how we feel about ourselves, our relationships and our life in general depends upon the lens we are looking through.. and our lenses are largely (in)formed by our beliefs.. In fact our lenses are affected by so many variables that it bears checking in regularly to ask ourselves ‘what assumptions am I making here, what story am I telling myself, is it possible I might be wrong about this, could there be another way of looking at this thing that is troubling me, what factors are influencing my feelings about x or y? As Jung also said to ask the right question is already half the solution of a problem.

17.01.2022 .. be careful what stories you tell yourself..

11.01.2022 Sometimes when we’re feeling down and share that with another person we might hear them say ‘oh I’m sure it will get better soon’ or ‘oh but you look really well!’ Or ‘oh I’m sure they didn’t mean it..’ While comments like these are (I’m pretty sure) intended to be supportive and ‘positive’, often the effect they have is to negate our feelings and inadvertently make us feel worse.. we may tell ourselves ‘oh I shouldn’t fee this way... why can’t I be more positive about thing...s.. it’s not THAT bad.. maybe I’m wrong to feel this or certainly to whinge about it..’ But the reality is that some days we just feel crap. Or life seems unbearably stressful and hard. We may even know that ‘objectively’ things aren’t terrible, but just now they sure feel that way. In these moments we need to remind ourselves that feeling this way is completely ‘normal’ and that if we can let ourselves have a bad mood or an angry day or just to feel blergh, these feelings will pass on their own. We are all allowed to feel bad. ALL of us feel like shit sometimes. And sometimes we can ping from fine to terrible and back like a yo-yo! Much as we like to think of ourselves as highly rational creatures the fact is that we human beings are very much driven by our emotions! So unless you’re not getting out of bed, or ceasing to function entirely, or resorting to really unhealthy coping mechanisms (in which case please seek help) you’re probably ok and in the grip of a passing feeling that will abate and recede if you can just let it be.. Try to look upon your feelings with curiosity and compassion. Let yourself be. It’s ok, it will pass.. just hang on and above all be kind to yourself...

11.01.2022 Why do we believe our thoughts and act as if they are ‘true’? Is it because they are internally generated and therefore ‘feel’ like they must be ‘real’? I genuinely think the biggest challenge to young people especially (though really this applies to all humans!) is to question ‘automatic’ thoughts... I hear time and time again in my practice people talking about how their ‘feelings’ are causing pain and suffering. In fact it is often not our feelings that are the problem ...per se, rather it is the things we tell ourselves about them.. our thoughts about them.. how we judge them and ourselves as a result. Perhaps if we could routinely learn to challenge our negative thoughts (is this real? Can I be absolutely sure? Could there be any other explanation? Is what I am thinking even likely to happen, and if so would it be that terrible?) then we might start to broaden our perspectives and allow our feelings to be, without catastrophizing our future.. Most of the things we think during the course of a day are nonsense. Bad thoughts if left unquestioned are like viruses and will attach and spread until one is sick and miserable. And in the most tragic instances they can kill us. Learn to challenge yourself and you just may insulate yourself from the very real dangers that can arise when wrong thinking is left unchecked. See more

05.01.2022 Why therapy? No it's not just for those in crisis, but for anyone who wants to understand themselves better...and isn't that most of us?! :)

05.01.2022 I am heartbroken and angry today to hear of the suicide of yet another young person in our community.. That this keeps happening is deeply concerning and horrifying for all who are left to grieve. Once again I hear that even those who saw her regularly didn’t know she was struggling and every picture posted on social media was laughing and smiling. Please please talk with your children about the importance of being real and honest about how they are feeling.. not to buy int...o the ‘it’s all good’ bullshit that they think is required of them.. Real life is often painful and messy and uncomfortable and confusing. We ALL struggle and manage ourselves as best we can, but it does no one any good to fake it or pretend or hide.. There is always someone who would listen and care.. Social media is an insidious force that is causing massive anxiety and depression in our young people. Let’s try and encourage all our youngsters to not post fake images, to have the courage to tell the truth and be seen for all that they are, not just the shiny happy parts. True intimacy and connection comes from sharing the hard stuff and daring to be vulnerable .. the best relationships are based on truth and openness and integrity. Be real everyone. Dare to talk to someone when you are struggling. Reach out when you are suffering. Life changes all the time whether we like it or not, sometimes we just need to remind ourselves to hang on and let things pass. I wish this young woman had made a different choice and I am heartbroken for all who loved her and will miss her every day. See more

03.01.2022 Love this! So true..

03.01.2022 An important lesson that I struggle with sometimes, particularly as a parent. Today I will remind myself that soothing my own nervous system in the face of a crisis might just be the best way to support those I love.

02.01.2022 Love this truism by the inimitable and always herself Dolly Parton.