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16.05.2022 B E F R I E N D I N G anger Anger is a fierce protector, a teacher, an often untapped power source. Anger can be one of our greatest resources particularly when we’re in survival mode in life and in parenting.... Are you curious about your relationship to anger and how embodying it more fully could enrich your life? Join me for a facilitated discussion group for mothers tomorrow 6-7pm AEST Melbourne Australia. This is a regular free session on a Monday, to explore anger as an antidote to survival mode. Attend two sessions as pre-requisites for our program Befriending Anger. Befriending anger is a longer program for mothers. Details coming soon. Email [email protected] for link. #befriendinganger #mindfulmothering

06.05.2022 m o t h e r r a g e Mother rage is real. The tricky part is, it can feel wrong, hard to accept and even worse, creates a pile of guilt. ... The good news.. you are sitting on a powerhouse. Anger Is your boundary maker, energiser, fierce protector and clarity maker. When we re-claim anger we re-claim ourselves. Anger gets a bad rap, for good reason. Many of us know way more about unhealthy anger than we do about the healthy version. Anger goes sour when it’s pushed away, it is meant to move and energise, not harden and deaden us. It takes a ton of effort to keep anger quiet, it creates exhaustion and morphs into depression. It can look like sarcasm, cynicism, snide comments, anger is just trying to get a look in. We have internalised the familial, societal, gendered stories of anger. Many of us aren’t conscious of our relationship to anger, don’t know how to access it and miss out of its powerful force in our lives and mothering. How and where can you explore this? With me and others who know the territory, can hold space for a new conversation. I have been on angers path for some year now and can report its empowering landscape. I want to pass this on, so we can raise each other up. This week some of us from my sister venture @thriveformothers met online to talk about anger, just for an hour. The conversation was moving, fascinating, fun and real. We want to keep moving with this. Join us if you’re curious, Monday nights 6-7pm comment below or email [email protected] to receive link. Online Rage Club coming soon 4 week facilitated dive into awakening anger. Pre-requisite attend two Monday night sessions 6-7pm on Zoom in your living room. #angerrocks #motherrage #rageclub #yesitstime #angersintelligence

16.04.2022 Yes, this one..

08.04.2022 C E R V I X C O N S E N T C L O S E C A L L TW surgery / hysterectomy ... ************ I’m knee deep in a personal, interpersonal and political project about the surgical removal of the womb from a woman’s body, that we call hysterectomy. The nutshell highlight.. ..by way of a rushed and insufficient consent process I signed away my whole womb and cervix for removal, when I didn’t need to. In some blessed moment I remembered my embodied consent skillset, my lived experience of ‘the’ and my cervix being wired for pleasure. All the words of advocacy I had spoken in support of and on behalf of others.. and realised I had failed to that for myself. Why? And more poignantly how? I realised I’d been hoodwinked, me, the cervix, s3xuality and consent nerd. The story is juicy, it’s still taking shape and showing me it’s rabbit holes. Bottom line is, that ought not to have happened and I’ll be coming back to this. If I can prevent just one less cervix going on the bin, like mine nearly did.. telling my story would have been worth it. So now, I have a little time to prepare for surgery (rather than a few days).. and so went back and cleared up the mess. Did some research, spike up, asked questions, decided I had the right to do that, and time.. I feel better already, knowing that I will be a vocal participant rather than a silent passenger. The grieving process has kicked in, in the ‘I’ll come when I’m ready’ way grief does. What’s delightful is there is a bubbling creativity stream emerging with it. I’m inspired to build a womb from the things I have in my house.. this is the beginning of inner section. A visceral experience.

28.03.2022 A N. E X P E R I M E N T for you this is heart : brain science It is also a foundational, if not, the foundational skill for valuing, noticing and expanding your pleasure capacity in ALL realms of experience. Solo, with another or more.... You can do this anywhere, while walking, eating, staring out the window, at work, at home, holding a child or a larger loved one, in nature, in bed, in the shower. Re-wire your self towards and for the pleasure that really is innately you. Step 1 Make an intention - decide - that today you will pay attention to the feelings and sensations of joy / pleasure / lightness (whatever word feels right to describe that uplift in the chest when you notice something beautiful or pleasing to you). Step 2 When you notice that sensation / feeling, take a breath and put 100% of your attention on it, imagine it is growing inside you, like a slow motion cloud billowing in the sky, imagine you are absorbing it. Step 3 Breath, pay attention, for 15 seconds. See what happens, for science! This results of this practice illustrate of the ‘experience dependent neuroplasticity’ of the brain, as Rick Hanson calls it. When we consciously pause and extend these moments, we literally allow space for neurons to wire together, he calls it installation. It sets up a pattern of habit that becomes somewhat automatic after a period of practice. Surprising things can occur.. even when practiced for one day! The gold is in what you notice when you do it. If you get to lunchtime and realise you forgot, it’s ok, you remembered now, try this afternoon. This is part of the practice, kick starting the mind to remember. That’s a moment of mindfulness. Today I will do the same and share what I notice.. would love to hear of your adventures! #mindfulsensation #mindfulness #extendingjoy #neuroplasticity #thrivepractices #pleasurematters

11.03.2022 S E E I N G R E D You know.. it’s totally worth it. Investigating anger and it’s connection to your sexuality, and if you are growing a family, before birth. ... Anger is our fierce protector, exquisite sensitiser, connector to life force. Healer of lethargy, depression, repression, suppression, regression. Anger is a generator, the power plant within, it is healthy clean energy at source. Repressed anger becomes dirty, blocked and starts to poison us, because it is meant to flow. Like fossil fuel for the earth, unhealthy anger is unsustainable for a vital human life. But our bodies do have capacity to tolerate a whole lot of rubbish, like the earth herself. When turning points come, like now, climate change, life transitions, this pattern of tolerating, collapses. For humans it comes in the shape of low resilience, band aid solutions no longer work, we see signs of breakdown.. everywhere.. enter crisis mode. Anger is inextricably connected to sexuality and birth, the three intersect, overlap and complement. The erotic can not be fully met unless we know anger. Anger often turns up as birth companion, if we’re lucky. At birth, anger in the form of determination pushes babies out, anger speaks up instead of keeping the peace. Anger provides energy to keep going. It helps us drop one course of action and follow another. Anger is usually messy, not often welcome by society at large, always transformative. Anger knows timing, is precise, clear, direct. Anger turns us on, sensitising nerves and freeing stuck tension in fascia, muscles, organs. Anger moves us towards full body sensing, presence and pleasure. If you’ve ever seen a person in the throes of expressing healthy anger you’ll know it’s powerful and spine chillingly real. Awe-some and inspirational, courageous, humble and vulnerable. It’s wild, it’s our wild. See red. One Wild Life 1:1 sessions One Wild Life workshops coming You can find me on Instagram @redthread_somatics #onewildlife #birthangererotic #holdspaceforanger #birthpower Illustration titled ‘Particle Explosion 8’ Artist Ahmed Nabil

26.02.2022 M O R A L I N J U R Y the new / old term for burn out A friend sent me this great new resource from Canada. There is a great little video about the history of moral injury that concludes there is no framework yet for the recovery of moral injury. Stating that in fact some forms of therapy can be damaging rather than therapeutic.... Watch this space - I would like to gather a group of people together interested in exploring a model of recovery, I have colleagues who could support this beautifully, robust therapeutic frameworks including a model designed for working with unseen scars called STREAM. A pilot / research idea is forming in my mind collaboration with others. Please reach out if you’re interested in this. I’m particularly interested in connecting with my midwifery colleagues of the class of 2004 who graduated from Otago Polytechnic. Already in touch with 3 of you. I wonder how many more of us have similar stories. This is a foundational document that preceded this toolkit for health workers during Covid. https://www.moralinjuryguide.ca/ Here is the toolkit, which would also form source material. https://veteransmentalhealth.ca//moral-injury-toolkit-for/ And a definition:Moral injury refers to the psychological, social, and spiritual impact of events in which a person performs, witnesses, or fails to prevent acts that conflict with one’s own deeply held moral beliefs and values.1,2 First discussed in military settings, moral injury is a specific type of psychological injury that reflects an enduring impact on an individual’s self-image and world view. One of the keys to recovery in my mind is a container where everyone is seen, heard, respected and treated with kindness. #strongertogether #moralinjuryisreal

08.02.2022 B U R N - O U T I love a somatic analogy. This one is spot on.... I have spoken to many people in the last few months who describe themselves this way. I’m not alone, which helps. It has taken a mammoth amount of courage to face the uncomfortable truth that I am at the bottom of the barrel. It’s been confusing, because in many ways, work and personal life is thriving. Contradictions can be hard to hold, even harder to reconcile and impossible to know the next move. Uncomfortable because although I’ve known this for a long time, I kept going anyway. I couldn’t see a way out or the quality of support I needed. I had to be very specific and seek that out. I am an absolutely, unapologetically driven human. But I got to the point where I realised unless I changed it the trajectory looked pretty grim. I don’t have many answers yet and I’m learning as I go. What came up when I considered ‘what do I need to do about this?’ was a quiet and strong voice that just said.. stop. What to stop, when and how? Then my tolerance levels fell through the floor. Everything was pissing me off, all the time. The second thing to do was face the discomfort of not what would happen next if I did. In an attempt to avoid that I’d instead created an experience of walking on a tightrope without a safety net in sight. Both uncomfortable, what to lose? I’m noticing a fair bit of shame in calling burn out, but shame needs bringing into the sunlight. I’m sick of hiding, pushing myself to conform to ridiculous and oppressive structures. I’ve know they haven’t served me for a long time. It’s time to follow the flame on the inside that lights the way for me and this one wild life. * stay tuned for change - this page will be morphing, as I do #burnout #noshameinburnout #sustainableliving #stopthewheel #onewildlife

01.02.2022 M E , M Y V A L E N T I N E I am my own love generator.... When the roots of love, and the willingness to be loving lie within me, I see and feel love everywhere. The illusion of Disney love creates a dependence on others to be loving, for me to feel loveable. It means that if I’m not relating with a lover/partner at any one time I have no access to love. It places (unfairly and unrealistically) the job of love generation in the hands of someone else. And it creates a false correlation between others capacity or desire to demonstrate love and my loveableness. It feels wonderful to share love and feel an undoubtable sense of being loved, absolutely magic. However I have control over when I want and need to turn the love volume up. I am not controlled my some other love DJ. When I am the love generator I expand my access love many times over. I have love in the bank, it becomes effortless to share it when there are no limits. #memyvalenrine #lovewithoutlimits

23.01.2022 Curious about what your cervix has to do with pleasure and the core of you? I’m a Self:Cervix practitioner.. Here’s a short bio and more about Self:Cervix.... https://selfcervix.com/pages/body-workers

04.01.2022 This.. I see many people who have suffered avoidable injury.. you can do something about it.

02.01.2022 N E W B A B Y Thrive for birthworkers.. ... @thriveforbirthworkers See more

23.12.2021 N E W B A B Y Thrive for birthworkers. @thriveforbirthworkers