Talk Therapy in Sydney, Australia | Psychotherapist

Talk Therapy

Locality: Sydney, Australia

Phone: +61 439 457 779

Address: Suite 6, 108 Bronte Road Bondi Junction 2022 Sydney, NSW, Australia

Website: http://www.talktherapy.net.au

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24.01.2022 #InnerVoice Everyone has some sort of internal monologue whether they call it an inner voice or not. Have you ever caught yourself saying how could you have been so stupid? to yourself? Or perhaps Are you nuts?, That’s impossible. This is your inner voice which provides a running verbal monologue of thoughts while you’re awake. It is usually tied to a person's sense of self. Negative self-talk has been implicated in contributing to psychological disorders including depr...ession, anxiety, and bulimia nervosa. It’s worth paying attention to your inner voice. Reminding yourself to never say anything to yourself that you would not say to a friend is a good strategy to develop positive self-talk. After all, it’s just as easy to say I made a mistake as it is to say How could I be so stupid. Making small changes like this has a big impact on your wellbeing. Photo by Bess Hamiti from Pexels

19.01.2022 #Assertiveness The most common struggle for my clients in therapy is how to be assertive without being aggressive. We admire people who can express themselves assertively without offending but find it ugly when people are aggressive, even when they might be right. So how do assertive people do it so gracefully? They use a technique I call I Feel / I Want. Their sentences always begin with I rather than You. For example, it is more effective to say I FEEL resentful bec...ause I am doing most of the housework and I WANT to you to help around the house more than to say YOU are so lazy! When was the last time you helped me around the house?. It’s important to first identify how we are feeling (Resentful/ unloved/ tired/ angry/ sad). This must be followed by what you would like to see happen in order to rectify the problem. Be as specific as possible: I’d like you to be responsible for doing the laundry each week, loading the dishwasher/ getting the kids ready for schooland so on. Try it and let me know how it goes!

17.01.2022 #Reactions Therapists often encourage you to respond rather than react but what’s the difference? A reaction is based in the moment and doesn't take into consideration the long term effects of what you do or say. A response on the other hand usually comes more slowly. Reactions typically provoke more reactions often inviting aggressive or defensive responses and accomplish little.... So how do can I respond instead of reacting? Everyone’s different but here are some tips that help most people: 1. Know the difference between reacting and overreacting. 2. Identify your triggers. 3. Breathe before you do anything. 4. Listen to your personal control tower. 5. Gain perspective on the past and the future. 6. Don't bottle up your emotions.

14.01.2022 #Triangles Instead of talking directly to a friend or family member about something that’s bothering us, we sometimes talk to someone else about the problem. We might do this to vent, avoid conflict, or manipulate a relationship. This is called a triangle. Have you ever had a family member ask you to talk with, or pass a message of dissatisfaction to another family member or friend? That’s a triangle. Triangles create barriers between people and often lead to more conflict no...t less. For example, a non-drinking parent may express dissatisfaction with the drinking parent to their child. This includes the child in the discussion of how to solve the problem of the alcoholic parent and the child may then go to the alcoholic parent, relaying what they were told. Rather than communicating directly with each other, the dysfunctional parents will utilise a child. We have all used triangles and been involved in triangles throughout our life. It’s somewhat unavoidable. My question is, what’s stopping you from expressing your dissatisfaction directly to someone? Is it because you’re worried they will yell at you? Get defensive? Become abusive? Whatever it is, should be added to your dissatisfaction conversation.

09.01.2022 #Relationships According to relationship researcher John Gottman, for every negative feeling or interaction between couples, there must be five positive feelings or interactions to neutralise the negative experience. Unhappy couples tend to have more negative feelings and actions than positive ones. Partners who criticise each other, provide constant negative feedback, aren’t supportive of each other, don’t demonstrate affection or appreciation, or behave uninterested in thei...r partner are in relationships that are out of balance. Show interest, show affection, be appreciative, listen so you can understand, be accepting, lighten things up, be playful, joke, and enjoy each other’s company. Relationships are a lot like food. We all know what’s healthy and what’s not, but we just can’t seem to do it. Photo by Josh Willink from Pexels