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25.01.2022 It all starts before we are born. Did you know a foetus absorbs the mother’s emotional rhythms and energy which is the start of creating a humans temperament. Each developmental stage needs the completion of physical, cognitive and physiological growth to move onto the next stage. When there is trauma or experiences that delay growth it impedes on the next stage of development and aging. #inutero #lifedevelopment #cognitivedevelopment #physicaldevelopment #physiologicaldevelopment #traumaticbirth #limbicimprint #anxiety #inuterostress #themoderncounsellor

25.01.2022 We have the ability to help ourselves through anything with the gift of our simple breath. I say simple because we do it without thinking ..but there lies the problem. When we focus on our breath we become present, still, in control. #powerofthebreath #theanswerlieswithin #inhaleexhale #simpleandpowerful #wimhof #yogabreath #themoderncounsellor

23.01.2022 We have all been defensive. The goal - to protect ourselves. Protect ourselves from feeling vulnerable and from seeing our shadow side. when we can accept all parts of ourselves including the stuff we don’t like we don’t feel threatened when it is mirrored to us. #selfacceptance #awareness #growth #defensiveness #healing #acceptingthewholeself #shadowwork #johariwindow #onlinecounselling #sydneycounselling #themoderncounsellor

23.01.2022 Which voice is louder for you? Trauma can lead to an ego that is way too powerful which then crosses from ‘keeping me safe’ to ‘self sabotage’. We all have the amazing, gentle, wise, grounded and calm intuition that is always serving us and wants the best for us. It needs no proof to know you are enough. #intuition #innerguidance #ego #innervoice #selflove #selfawareness #growth #healing #onlinecounselling #sydneycounselling #themoderncounsellor

23.01.2022 What is your experience of life? Which list do you more of? Childhood and complex trauma and can leave us ticking more in the survival list but as I preach in most of my posts ‘healing is possible’ #timetostartliving #purpose #meaningoflife #meaningfullife #healingtrauma #livingyourbestlife #onlinecounselling #inpersoncounselling #psychotherapist #themoderncounsellor

21.01.2022 What does this post bring up for you when you read it? Does it trigger you? Do you feel uncomfortable? Do you feel nothing? My purpose is for you to start thinking about what would you describe as your masculinity traits..are they serving you? Are they adopted by your father? Your mother? Society? Have you written them yourself? Does seeking help for your mental health go against your views on masculinity? #letstalk #seekhelp #masculinity #growth #menscounselling #ego #healing #falsenarratives #mensmentalhealth #themoderncounsellor

21.01.2022 It never ceases to amaze me the healing benefits I get from the practice of yoga. We store our trauma and painful memories in our body. It can cause physiological pain. My personal experience is that there are certain poses and sequences that have the ability to unlock these emotions and memories that have been stuck for years, decades and release them when I first started yoga I would cry after every class. Years of pain pouring out. Years later I am caught off guard every now and again. Today was that day. I will forever be grateful for finding such an amazing tool to help me on my own personal healing journey. There will always be healing and learning to do. Forever grateful #yoga #healingbenefitsofyoga #healingjourney #thebodykeepsthescore #complextrauma #selfawareness #selflove

20.01.2022 This is beautiful

18.01.2022 You can do this Healing from trauma and negative programming is possible. YOU are in control Take your power back The list we can give ourselves is longer then what others can give us and btw a good counsellor can give you 4/5 of those points listed! What would you add to either list????? #healing #complextrauma #anxiety #invisibletrauma #depression #connection #belonging #forgivenessofself #onlinecounselling #themoderncounsellor

17.01.2022 Sometimes, #children who have issues self-regulating or who regularly fall off their chairs or who are in constant motion or who have uncommon troubles with ...toilet training may be having #sensory difficulties that need to be compassionately recognised and addressed. We’ve all heard of the 5 senses. Yet there are actually 8 main senses that are part of the sensory system of the body. Some would say there are even more, depending on how they define the word senses (main, basic, primary, etc). Unfortunately, even just considering the main 8 senses, 3 of them are virtually unheard of, not just because they are hard to explain and pronounce, but also because they only come up when there’s a problem. Another reason many have not heard of sensory processing or integration issues confined to the additional 3 senses is because of a debate that continues to unfurl in the wider clinical community. It is occupational therapists (OTs) who first theorised that sensory processing and sensory integration issues are a source of distress for many children and their families. Many issues still progress unrecognised by other specialists as they are sometimes not diagnosed under neurodevelopmental disorders or sensory processing issues. Yet it is indisputable across the disciplines that identifying sensory issues and working with an OT helps many children become calmer and better regulated. All parents and educators who wish to optimise children's physical development should have a recognition of a child's 8 developing senses, and not just limit #play and learning opportunities to the realms of #sight, #sound, #smell, #taste and #touch. The other 3 senses and how to recognise problems with them are explored below #VESTIBULAR SYSTEM The vestibular system includes the parts of the inner ear and brain that help control balance, eye movement and spatial orientation. It helps keep you stable and upright. It is the leading system informing us about movement and position of head relative to gravity. A body's movements include two positions rotations and linear directionality, all of which need development. The vestibular system sends signals primarily to the neural parts of the #brain that control our eye movements and that keep us balanced and upright. #PROPRIOCEPTION The proprioceptive system senses the position, location, orientation, and movement of the body muscles and joints. Proprioception provides us with the sense of the relative position of neighbouring parts of the body and effort used to move body parts. Proprioception is activated by input to a proprioceptor in the periphery of the body. The proprioceptive sense combines sensory information from neurons in the inner ear (detecting motion and orientation) and stretch receptors in the muscles and the joint-supporting ligaments for stance. Because of proprioception, if you raise your hand, you know that your arm is over your head. You don't have to think about it or look in a mirror. Kids who have trouble with the vestibular sense or proprioception could struggle with motor skills in a number of ways. They may seem awkward and clumsy. An activity like running or even going up and down stairs may be hard for kids who have difficulty knowing how their body is oriented and whether it's stable. They may move slowly or avoid activities that are too challenging. They may not know their own strength and use more muscles than they need for simple tasks, breaking pencil tips, ripping pages or giving overenthusiastic hugs. They may not like physical activities that other kids find fun. For example, they may not feel safe on the swings because they're not getting the sensory input that tells them they're securely seated. They may be in constant motion, bump into things or seem out of control. When kids don't get enough feedback from the sensory system, they may exaggerate their movements to get the information they need from the environment. When they walk down a hallway, they may knock into the wall to feel more anchored. They may kick their legs under their desk for the same reason. They may love physical activity like doing flips off the diving board or just jumping up and down. #INTEROCEPTION Interoception refers to sensations related to the physiological/physical condition of the body. Interoceptors are internal sensors that provide a sense of what our internal organs are feeling. Hunger and thirst are examples of interoception. It detects responses that guide regulation, including hunger, heart rate, respiration and elimination. The stimulation is detected through nerve endings lining the respiratory and digestive mucous membranes, and it works alongside the vestibular and proprioceptive senses to determine how a person perceives their own body. Well-modulated interoception helps the person detect sensations normally. For example, if a person feels their heart pounding, while it is not comfortable, trauma from the stimulation is not likely; nor will the stimulation be craved. The same is true for hunger and thirst, as well as the feeling of the need to urinate or have a bowel movement. Kids who struggle with the interoceptive sense may have trouble knowing when they feel hungry, full, hot, cold or thirsty. Having trouble with this sense can also make self-regulation a challenge. Most of us know if we're hungry, full, hot, cold, thirsty, nauseated, itchy or ticklish. For kids with sensory processing issues, the brain may have trouble making sense of that information. They may not be able to tell when they're feeling pain or when their bladder is full. An itch may feel like pain or pain may feel ticklish. Kids who struggle with the interoceptive sense can also have trouble feeling their emotions. They may not be as tuned in to the body cues that help interpret emotion. Without being able to feel and interpret those body sensations, it's harder to clearly identify the emotion. For instance, a child may not feel fear because they don't recognise that their muscles are tense, their breathing is shallow and their heart is racing. Kids who are under-responsive to interoceptive sensory input may not feel or respond to sensations when they should. They may take longer than other kids to learn to use the toilet or have more frequent accidents. They may not eat as often as others because they may not feel hunger or thirst. WHAT CAN YOU DO? If you suspect your child has sensory processing issues, consider having them evaluated by an occupational therapist (OT) who specialises in sensory integration. Follow the instructions from your therapist and spend some quality time together having fun. With vestibular sense or proprioception, you may find yourself helping your child complete activities that give them opportunities to use their arms and legs at the same time. Encourage your child to spend time in free play. Make a home obstacle course, show them how to do a push-up, or just have them help rake leaves and carry groceries. With interoception, you may find that a therapist directs your child more towards mindfulness activities like meditation, which can help kids be more aware of interoceptive sensations in their bodies. Heavy work (activity that pushes or pulls against the body) or a sensory diet may be helpful as well. The point is to give your child the sensory input that they need to feel in control of their body. When they get this information, it will help them feel more stable and focused. One of the reasons that children so naturally want to fidget, jump, balance, climb, and run around with each other is because of their natural instincts to develop all of their 8 senses as they grow. Over time, most kids will figure out their own strategies to work around their weaknesses and play to their strengths. https://childmind.org/ar/the-debate-over-sensory-processing https://www.misophoniainternational.com/you-have-8-senses-n https://www.understood.org//interoception-and-sensory-proc https://www.understood.org//how-sensory-processing-issues- #neurochild #letthemplay #sensory #physicality

17.01.2022 There is no one else like yourself that will know exactly what you need If you feel you don’t have anyone that will support you the exact way you need contact Nicole at @themoderncounsellor. I will hold space and safety for your deepest pain. #onlinecounselling and #inpersoncounselling available at #bondijunction location #counselling #psychotherapist #support #empathy #safespace #trust #healing #ruok

17.01.2022 Your physical health is directly related to your emotional and mental health. Prolonged chronic stress and emotional pain leads to physical health issues. this weekend find some time for restorative self care #yourhealthisyourwealth #thebodykeepsthescore #selfcare #selflove #autoimmune #chronicillness #anxiety #depression #fatigue #onlinecounselling #themoderncounsellor

15.01.2022 Boundaries! Buzz word of 2020 pop-psychology BUT they are essential for healthy relationships. Let’s get to the core of why you find boundaries difficult..spend some time alone and start looking at your childhood and the dynamics in your family system between everyone. Wanting to be accepted is a huge indicator usually (which is a survival mechanism for all of us) but when it goes too far it causes unbalance - enter - people pleading behaviour. Somewhere along the line your worthiness took a hit and hence the boundary issue starts. Question to leave you with ..what are your boundaries with yourself like? #boundaries #ambivalentattachment #anxiousattachment #selfcompassion #worthiness #onlinecounselling #themoderncounsellor

13.01.2022 Awareness is the first step. Ability to observe is the second. Healing one step at a time repost @soulguidance

10.01.2022 Intuition- the steady, safe, grounded ‘knowing’ that resides in all of us. often not noticed due to the loud eager ego voice giving you messages of fear To make your intuition easier to feel and hear spend time by yourself, spend more time relaxing, meditating, in nature and anything that makes you feel grounded and calm #ego #intuition #intuitiveguidance #grounding #intuitionvsego #innerguidance #healing #growth #themoderncounsellor

10.01.2022 Humans continue to exist because of the ego. Let’s be clear it’s not all bad. It’s role is to protect us. However, This causes a problem when we have experiences of hurt and trauma. The ego sets fearful messages to keep us safe. The internal critic can become so powerful that all we hear is fearful, anxious messages which completely drowns out the voice we do need to be listening to...your intuition. The soft voice in the background that doesn’t demand your attention like the ego does. who do you listen more to? Ego or intuition #myegoneedsarest #trustyourintuition #egodeath #ego #intuition #selfawareness #selfcompassion #yourintuitionisyoursuperpower #healing #growth #themoderncounsellor

08.01.2022 Do you have a place that you feel intense rest and peace? It’s so important you find an environment and place that allows your heart and soul to sleep. #soulsleep #rest #soul #freedom #selfcompassion #journeyinward #healing #themoderncounsellor

07.01.2022 A great article for expecting mums in this pandemic to create some calm for you by an amazing midwife Natalie Short from @Thecalmnest

06.01.2022 The relationship you have with yourself is the most important. #selfcompassion #authenticity #selflove #selfacceptance #boundaries #growth #onlinecounselling #themoderncounsellor #sydneycounselling

05.01.2022 I consider Gabor Maté to be one of the greatest pioneers for so many mental health problems we face. ‘Genuine grieving is the opposite of trauma’. Read this article if you are struggling with the mental strain of COVID-19 or trauma in any part of your life.

05.01.2022 The more I sit with clients and listen to their vulnerabities the more I know this to be true...we are all the same. We have the same fears, sadness, shame, embarrassment..the list goes on. I also know this to be true...shame dies when stories are told in safe places. If you have someone in your life that holds space for your vulnerability then you are amongst the wealthiest in life. If you don’t consider counselling. #vulnerabilityisstrength #shamedies #connection #storiesareshared #meaningfullife

03.01.2022 Maybe humans should come with warning labels.

03.01.2022 The first developmental stage of a humans life after birth is infancy. This is the important time that shapes the type of attachment we have to our parents and caregivers. I have posted previously the four main types of attachment that can be shaped by our experiences with our closest caregiver, usually the mother but not in all cases. The other super important need an infant has is healthy attunement. This is communicated in the energy and intuition we have to our ch...ildren. Were your parents in tune with your vibration? Are you in tune with your children’s needs? Attunement is not achieved through giving birth to the child. It’s achieved through the intimate time spent with the infant. Being truly present and plugging into the child’s energy to preempt their needs creates attunement. This unspoken energy is essential for our development. Cognitive and psychosocial development delays can occur in a child that did not receive a healthy attunement to their main caregivers. This is not to say they are permanent but each developmental life stage has growth marks we need to achieve to move forward to the next developmental stage and when they are impeded, delays and issues are possible. #complextrauma #lifedevelopment #nurture #lifespan #infancydevelopment #attunement #gabormate #attachment #growth #themoderncounsellor See more

02.01.2022 For many, what you think is the ‘personality’ of an individual, is actually a survival tool created in their attempt to feel safe in life when they have experienced complex trauma in childhood. So much of what we think is our permanent fixed self is actually a survival mechanism or attempt of controlling our experience of life due to the effects trauma has left us with Do the deep work and watch these ‘characteristics’ melt away. Healing and change is possible Have you healed? What would you add to this list? #childhoodtrauma #complex-trauma #healingtrauma #healingjourney #selfawareness #selflove #selfcompassion #behaviours #emotions #onlinecounselling #inpersoncounselling #themoderncounsellor