Carrina Hampton | Family therapist

Carrina Hampton

Phone: +61 497 139 676

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25.01.2022 Today I passed the 120,000 step target, day 18/31. So I think I might push for 200,000 by the months end. This fundraiser is a special one for me and my kids. So I am sharing a little of our story below. I have had Type 1 Diabetes (Juvenile Diabetes) since I was 15. A late onset for Type 1 back then.... While many of you probably aren't even aware that I have T1D, it impacts every aspect of my life; it has for 24 years, and it will for 60+ more :-). It impacts what and when I eat, how exercise works (or doesn't) for me, constant medications, as well as impacting on major life decisions and experiences. Mostly I live life with T1D in the background, trying to not allow it to rule my life. But there are also times, too many to count, where the vigilance and response of my family members (including young children) has allowed me to wake up for another tomorrow. Witnessing these moments has had a major impact on my loved ones, who are often far more aware and affected than me. So... What does funding for research mean? Already over the past 24 years, it has meant a lot to me. A move from 5 injections a day, to an insulin pump inserted only twice a week. It has meant constant glucose monitoring, rather than 5-10 blood tests a day. It has meant 4 healthy pregnancies and fantastic births and babies, when this was high risk and unlikely 30+ years ago. And further developments will provide more gains like this, and maybe even one day, a cure. Which for me will mean a 'normal' healthy life and likely more years to enjoy that life. For my husband and children, it will mean sleeping more easily not worried that low blood sugars and subsequent seizures could drastically change my life, and therefore theirs. So as I, and they, count our steps in October for this cause, please consider giving up tomorrows coffee in place of a donation towards this research. https://walk.jdrf.org.au/s/12532/15891/

24.01.2022 So much truth in this presentation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyvXwknIcPQ

23.01.2022 Willow Training College and Bunbury Counselling will be offering face-to-face programs from Semester 2 (July 2021). Courses will be scheduled in Bunbury, with ...Expressions of Interest open for Mandurah and Busselton programs. Additional venues (and flexible timetables) are available to meet community need. Enquire now about the Diploma in Holistic Integrated Creative Arts Therapy for more information or register your interest.

23.01.2022 HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to my BLENDED FAMILY!

22.01.2022 Today I had the pleasure of a phone appointment with a lovely man who shared my love of lame Dad Jokes! Obviously this wasn't the reason for his counselling appointment... but as our session ended and I set his homework, he too set mine. "3 Dad Jokes before next week"... So this is your time, fellow Dad Joke lovers. Please add you're best in comments.

21.01.2022 Tough work place today. Consults at Pullman Resort, Bunker Bay.

18.01.2022 https://www.facebook.com/events/614233206132016/

18.01.2022 Following my article in the latest edition of Business Women Rising (http://bit.ly/BizWomenRisingMag2), I am 100% in grant seeking mode. We currently have opportunities for partnering with a NFP (not for profit) organisation to launch your ideas and gain funding. If you are keen to hear more about how to partner with a NFP, and get your services funded - please PM me asap. Opportunities are limited and need to be finalised this month. PM me, call 0497139676 or email [email protected]

17.01.2022 APPRECIATION IN YOUR FAMILY (please share your stories and thoughts)

14.01.2022 We are running programs from 2021 supporting young people with disabilities to gain employment or move into self employment. Disability includes a big range, including social emotional disability, mental health, physical disability, intellectual disability and more. The misunderstandings about disability is huge, include the abundance of skills someone can have, as well as a disability. A disability in one area, does not exclude strengths and skills in others Eg a person i...n a wheelchair can support with admin, IT, customer service and more. * A person who a social- emotional disability can work great in trades or behind the scenes (if social anxiety is their disability)* A person with a vision it hearing impairment can understand endless roles* *** These are very generalised, just trying to illustrate the point, please excuse the stereotyping. Please email me answers - [email protected] My questions are: Have you ever employed a person with a disability? If yes, please share your experience with me. If no, why not? What are the blocks? If you were to consider hiring a person with a disability, what would you need: - training for them (in what courses, areas) - knowledge, training for you and your staff? What roles could you imagine you could consider for a person with a disability, as well as other strengths. Is there training, coaching you could provide to a young person wanting to explore self-employment in their own business? Would you be interested in being involved in our project, to support this initiative? Please email answers: [email protected]

13.01.2022 Wow this is fantastic. I wish it was in segments, as each part spoke to me individually, but also together. It's 30 minutes long, but so worth watching. My children will be watching this this weekend and we will discussing as a family.... I also want to say a big thank you, to my beautiful friend Patricia Hayward, who took the time many years ago to maintain a 'hypothesis of generosity' with me, when she led many difficult conversations that we're kind but very very needed. https://www.facebook.com/brenebrown/videos/1778878652127236/

12.01.2022 Time to plan your future? https://www.facebook.com/Willow-Training-College-103851884863235

12.01.2022 Great time to get involved. PM me if you want more information.

12.01.2022 Ready to raise funds for your organisation? Or planning a career in Grant Writing? We have the perfect program for your goals. Get in touch today for more infor...mation. PM us or email [email protected] 0497 139 676 See more

12.01.2022 Our Certificate in Meditation Teaching and Holistic Human Development is ready for enrolments from next week! 100% online, available anywhere in the world. Get your Certificate in as little as 3 months. https://www.willowtrainingcollege.com/certificate-in-medita

11.01.2022 I am keen to start some pre-Christmas sharing. What are the traditions you love in your family?

10.01.2022 As our website nears completion, we are seeking recommendations and links for the very best Blended and Step Family supports. Keen for local providers who absolutely nail this area as well as online resources that you think are great.

09.01.2022 We are putting together a 2-year mentoring program for Entrprential and Executive Women in Leadsherip across the South West Region. We want as many local businesses involved as possible, so need urgent Quotes and Service information from: Executive Business Coaches (programs, ideal clients, prices) Photographers (Profile pics and events, pricing Public Speakers (topics and prices)... Trainers: Governance, Public Speaking Career Coaches, Counsellors or Development Officers Venues for workshops and events Please email me with details of your services, prices for individual and group (25+) rates, topics for speakers, trainers etc. Quotes and information requested this weekend please - sorry for the rush. Please email [email protected] See more

08.01.2022 I was asked tonight about parenting 7 children and how we do it. So, I thought I would share my response. 1. We are a team. As two working parents, we endeavo...ur to give our children every opportunity available to them (should they commit and work hard enough to facilitate it); but this also means we aren’t available to manage everything at home 100% or be at their beck and call. We work as a team. 9 family members (one a baby so he gets leave pass for the time being), who all contribute to the household. It might be dishes or feeding the dogs or sitting quietly at Mums work while she finishes with a client, but it is all being a part of the family team. Everyone contributes to their own capacity, and everyone benefits from the whole. This is not me condemning families who have strong values around parents doing household tasks, allowing children to be children. I honour these families and absolutely respect their positions. We need to be clear about our values and priorities and stick with them wholeheartedly, while they work. It just didn’t work for us; and maybe because I was raised in a family where we all contributed, which now works for me too. I was never a good stay at home mum I made more mess than I ever cleaned. 2. We do not ascribe to societal rules or expectations about stages. I am utterly irritated when I hear terrible twos or that’s just how teenagers are rubbish. This is simply a lazy accepting of excuses for why you don’t need to parent during those stages. And yes, I agree that there are stages, but it is our job to teach, nurture and guide through those stages. Right now, I have an 18-month-old who is pushing every boundary (and button), he is absolutely frustrated with us not understanding what he wants/needs because his brain is far more advanced than his language. So, our job as parents is to support him in his frustrations. Encourage him to stop (the tantrum) and use his words as few of them as he has. Generally, his response is up (pick me up) or ball (give me the ball) or momma (which strangely means I want what I am pointing to, usually a bottle). If you stop, listen and remain present with these babes, they will learn, and so will you. If you don’t you will become the parents who moves from terrible twos to I thought twos were bad, try three’s- of course, this is the case, you gave them a whole year of practice and imagine what another 12 years of practice will create. And teens. OMG the next person who sits in my room and tells me that it’s normal for teenagers to just sit in their room gaming, not engaging with the family, and never helping with household tasks I might just stand and walk clean out! NOOOOOO it is not normal! What you have allowed for years is what you are getting now. You are not your teen's slave, nor their enemy. The relationship you have with them at 15 is dependent on the credits in the bank / the bricks you laid in the early years. At 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9. Start there. Ask yourself, why your 15-year-old doesn’t want to enjoy dinner with the family? Or a day out? It is not teenagerhood, I can assure you. Our 17-year-old is 100% engage with us, participates in family activities and helps out around the house and in our businesses. And before you ask no she is not an antisocial nerd, she is also very social. She just participates as an active member of our family. We also have lots of kids in between those ages, currently, 9,9,9,10,11 and they also have their challenges. Hormones are fun . But again, this is an aspect of what is going on for a child, not an excuse for them, or for you. 3. We don’t accept Sibling Rivalry as an acceptable excuse for unkind treatment of each other I heard recently how proud a mum was that her children back each other at school yet attack each other at home as though this was a definition of closeness. And I have been reminded, by my own children especially, that siblings do fight, but I do not agree to take this as something we should accept. Disagree yes, argue on a level, yes, but there is no reason for siblings to attack, belittle or physical harm one another. This world is cruel enough, we do not need to build enemies within. I recall a colleague once saying that her family motto was act with kindness, and don’t be a dick! it worked for them. Mine is little more like act with kindness and you are responsible for you! no matter what someone else does to you, you can only control your own actions so make them kind and honourable. Apologise (genuinely), when you have wronged someone, walk away when you feel triggered, seek support when you need it. But do not spread your hurt to others, as it only grows, it doesn’t dissipate. 4. We are human and we absolutely stuff up. We are not perfect parents, my god, we probably aren’t even good parents. We err daily, but we own it. We are open with our kids about our emotions and sometimes imperfect emotional responses, and we encourage them to do the same. I am known to say to parents in my consulting rooms perfect parents stuff kids up when they are worried that their child saw them cry or witnessed them frustrated. Imagine growing up with a parent who never had an emotional response, never made a mistake that child would grow up thinking that their parents were perfect and that they themselves were broken. That their feelings or mistakes made them less than their parent/s. Meanwhile, the parent who feels sad and explains that to his/her child, who expresses frustration and apologies for snapping, who breaks the egg on the floor and then cleans it up these parents teach their children about humanity. They teach them that feelings are perfectly acceptable, that behaviours can be controlled, but even then, sometimes we stuff up. And then they can learn that when you do stuff up, it is then that you apologise, make an effort to repair and move on! Because being human is being perfectly imperfect. 5. Humour and Honesty all the Way Don’t ever let anyone tell you that humour doesn’t have its place. My gosh, it absolutely does. And for us, it pairs perfectly with honesty. Our 7 babies are each unique and perfectly individually, but none of them are perfect. They know their strengths, they know their limitations, and they also know that growth in both requires hard work. We have the naturally sporty, the academically gifted, the budding- chef, the rule-obsessed policeman, the musician, the helper, the socialite, the confident leader, the flexible follower, the noisy, the quiet achiever and more. We also have the tone-deaf singer, the child who can leave the house with one shoe on, the absent-minded whattttt? child, the half-job doer, the non-team player, the dreamer, the sensitive one, the shit-stirrer, the messy one, the bossy one, the rule-breaker, the rule miser, and loads of selective deafness. There is no pretending around here. There is only owning and growing. Obviously, we all have things we need to work on; and that will never come from us as parents telling them they are perfect from day one. Instead, we celebrate their strengths and use these to inspire growth in other areas. We also try to nurture their ego’s and souls through both. And we do this with a lot of laughter. Children and parents openly own their strengths and limitations, with a smile and an acknowledgement. There is no room for pretenders here. This applies to us as parent too. My kids love to play Pictionary with me, because I am such a bad drawer. It's a running joke, that we all laugh at. I'm not sensitive about it, it's real. I also know that if I wanted to improve I could, I just chose not to. Honesty is our absolutely Family Rule. This aligned with my Father’s positions as we were growing too. Fess up and tell the truth, the parents won’t be thrilled, but let them catch you in a lie look out! This is us too. So many times, the child who stepped forward with the truth has copped a task to fix what was broken, but s/he who chose to lie has a far bigger task ahead of them. This aligned with the ideas above, we all stuff up, we all do stupid things actually I think me more than most but lying about it undermines the core of who you are, and how you value relationships. I would far prefer to be the person who ate the cookie from the cookie jar, then to be the person who no one can trust. We appreciate that testing with lies, and fear about telling the truth is real for children and give some scope around this too but being a part of our family means being honest and being real. 6. The numbers do not add up Final point, this is not normal math. One child - challenging as s/he is your first. Two children - double the work Three children ahhh I ran out of lap space and hands to hold theirs Four, Five, Six, Seven just another car seat, bunk bed, and potato (or 4) in the evening meal. It doesn't keep multiplying. Additions to big families just fit in. I often laugh that people think asking us to have their child/ren is a big ask given the number we have frankly we don’t even notice. Our gorgeous neighbours often laugh that they lose their kids, thinking they are in their bedrooms, only to discover they have been in our yard, with our kids for hours. For us, an extra mouth to feed, a glass of water to fetch, grazed knee to plaster, is nothing. In fact, we likely have an older sibling who can help with those things anyway. I do recall someone talking about big families once, and she said it was important to her that she raised her children, not older siblings raising the younger ones. This I agree with. Older siblings are a part of the team as above, but they are not parents, and should not feel the responsibility of parents. Cooking a meal during the week, changing the odd nappy, and more recently with a Licence doing a school drop off is all part of the team here but so is us taking her to events, entertaining her friends, paying for her every need, and snuggling on the couch, cos she is still my baby too. Big families are a choice, but as with any life choice, there are pluses and minuses. For me the bigger the better. I am only done! because (1) I want to enjoy Grandparenting as a stage separate from parenting young children; and (2) Because my darling husband has his divorce bag packed if I add another child. On a side note to finish. He (husband) never wanted children!! Hahahahaha. I think the wrong entity (God, Mother Nature, the Universe) heard that and responded with Challenge Accepted! Happy Parenting!

07.01.2022 Have you always wanted to help people? Is now the time for you to explore how to gain the knowledge, skills and confidence to be a counsellor, coach or medit...ation teacher? Willow Training College and Bunbury Counselling are offering limited opportunities to complete all of your training from Certificate Levels through to Masters in just 2 years (part-time also available) with the added bonus of internship and work placements to ensure you complete the program job ready, confident and connected with the industry. Contact us today for more information - our February intake is currently open, with programs beginning soon. See more

05.01.2022 Oh it has been a long time between pub sessions!! Very happy to be back in Bunbury WA at The Bayview Bar. Looking forward to connecting with our latest dads-to-be.

01.01.2022 Join our trainee and internship team at Bunbury Counselling in 2021, as we support you in your career journey. [email protected] Tag someone who you know would make a great Holistic Empowerment Coach, or Holistic Counsellor.