Chantelle Otten Sex Therapist in Malvern, Victoria, Australia | Medical and health

Chantelle Otten Sex Therapist

Locality: Malvern, Victoria, Australia

Phone: +61 3 9015 9759

Address: 181-183 Wattletree Rd 3144 Malvern, VIC, Australia

Website: http://www.chantelleotten.com

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25.01.2022 Post 7 - Plan an erotic date night. The challenge is almost over, so please don’t give up yet! Instead, elevate the romance by planning a dreamy date night that brings you back to your dating days. Studies show that date nights actually increase sexual satisfaction in both men and women, so expect great things. I would suggest that you both do the Love Languages quiz! 5lovelanguages.com and found out the way your sexual partner likes to receive love maybe it’s words of affirmation (you are amazing, you are doing a great job etc), maybe it’s gifts (I bought you this sex toy/ lingerie)... and see if that elevates the night. I suggest cooking something together in the nude, or playing dom/sub, and use some of the games I suggested last week!

25.01.2022 A series on getting 50 shades of laid- Part 1- Its time to talk about power play, or BDSM. It is something that a lot of people are curious about. Many couples love being able to let go and be submissive or dominant during lovemaking, the dynamic is motivating, arousing and seriously erotic. Domination and submission are wide categories and mean different things to different people, but overall they have the same key elements. Communication, playfulness and consent. First t...hings first on this journey to non-vanilla sex. Its time to bring it up with your partner : Id love to try a few naughty things, Im vibing some kink. Something outside the box. Then you can discuss what your preferences are. I suggest a brainstorming session in bed. Separately, write a note in your phone with 3 sections: Things you would do, wouldnt do and might try. Then check what is on each others lists. Now, its ok to be unsure, and its a great idea to do some research or look for inspiration. This exercise is designed to really get you to tap into that part of yourself that may want to explore through power differences, and figuring out what you like gives your partner a good foundation to be able to provide it. There are some essential things to consider however. Even 50 shades, whilst isnt the best model for BDSM, has established preferences and the essential safe words. Safe words are extremely important, establishing a code word like pineapple or lemon. Something completely unrelated to sex. And obviously before you do anything kinky make sure you are on the same page about consistent consent (i.e. continue asking if it is ok, as you work through the erotic experience. @spencer_charles

25.01.2022 Seven days of sensual activity! Post 4 got removed because of violating com guidelines- so here it is again: Post 4- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Today is just about having fun! It is all about oral and toys! Pick one of you in the couple to take the focus today. I want you to do the activities from the day before, warming up, music playing, in your sensual sanctuary, and then the person who is the receiver is able to get worshipped. To be doted on. The touche...r sets up the room, supplies what the receiver should wear and asks them to lie in a certain position. The toucher starts to warm up the touchers body. Worshipping them. Showing them how desired they are. This goes on for a long time. Kissing the whole body, even giving a sensual massage. Then, the toucher starts to head down to the genitals, kissing along their way, and kissing around the vulva/penis. Stroking. And then according to the receivers preference, can either have a toy used on them or receive oral sex. Slow and steady. Because there is no goal here, we dont want you to race to the end, its about sensuality and having a great time! If using hands/toys, use lubricant and take your time. If the receiver has a penis, I suggest using hands and mouth at the same time, with the hand holding the penis and flowing up and down with the mouth. If the person has a vulva, remember that it takes about 25mins on average for vulva owners to reach climax so let the toucher stay down there! Its the most expensive meal they have ever had! @sentient_meat_ See more

24.01.2022 Sexual Pain Series Part 1: So, I am wanting to explain female sexual pain again. Because as time goes on, I realise that more and more women are discovering that sex... just isnt that comfortable for them! If you find it difficult or painful to insert a tampon, have a cervical screening or insert a finger/vibrator/penis into your vagina... then you may want to hold off penetrative intercourse for a while, because there may be the possibility of you having vaginismus. Vagin...ismus sounds like christmas for the vagina, but its actually the opposite. Its like halloween. Vaginismus is a form of sexual pain. Its an involuntary (meaning: you cannot control) contraction of the pelvic floor muscles surrounding the vagina making penetration or sex painful, if not impossible. It feels like burning, razor blade-like sensations in the vagina. And sometimes, like the penis is hitting a brick wall. In fact its the main cause of unconsummated relationships. I will continue to educate you in the next few posts about it, however, if you feel like you have it... stop penetration now! It will make things worse. Outercourse is the key to pleasure here, and I recommend purchasing a womanizer so you can experience clitoral pleasure and zero pain (because it sits on the clitoris! No penetration). If you havent got a @womanizerglobal , simply start out with the Starlet, which is guaranteed to make sure you never have an average orgasm, only exceptional gasms come with this little pleasure product! Second photo @hara_thelabel

24.01.2022 Post 5- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Tonight is about recreating intimacy from early on in your relationship. Research shows that nostalgia can literally revive relationships. Play a song that evokes your early years together, break out some long-hidden lingerie, or use sexy pet names from when you first fell in love. OR my fave, have sex somewhere that you did back in the day, wherever that may be (if you can access it) for example, if you have a sneaky romp in a popular park after a date ;) go back there (of course this is not for anyone who is in lockdown right now, so park this idea and recreate a night that you had at home!) @endlesslyloveclub

21.01.2022 Post 8 - Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - The last night. Make this night about doing whatever you like! Afterwards, have an open conversation about your physical intimacy, and how you will continue on the momentum youve built over the past week. A snuggle after sex and making some commitments to your sex life will enhance your relationship, your connection and your relational satisfaction. Fix the sex fix the relationship! Other benefits of pillow talk include higher sexual self-esteem, more pleasure, and less apprehension. I hope it worked well for you! Shoot me a comment or DM about your experience! @periodaisle

21.01.2022 Its been a super special week in my family. Welcome little Florence Danielle Otten, born Friday 3rd, 6 weeks early. She is beautiful. Congrats @rotten_ottennn and @georgiamur for becoming parents and being so strong during this process. Alex Im also thrilled that you can live out your dream of being a #dadsofinstagram

20.01.2022 Anal sex continued: 3. Have a bath or hot shower first to wash off the day and clear your head! Plus your muscles will be nice and relaxed 4. Start with foreplay, and heaps of it. The more aroused you get, the more comfortable your internal sphincter muscles will be. I always believe that having a clitoral vibrator in your hands and on your clit at the same time is the best way to have anal sex. Use heaps of lubricant, because the anus does not produce natural lubricant like... the vagina does. The more lube the better! If using a condom or a toy in the anus, you need a water-based lube. If it is skin on skin, then an excellent silicone lube. 5. Positions! Try you on top so you can control the depth and the speed of penetration Doggy style is always great, or with a few pillows under your hips and bent over them so your partner can easily control their depth Spooning is also wonderful, especially if one leg is cocked to the side and you can hold your vibrator on your vulva for extra pleasure 6. Remember to breathe into the exercise and try and relax the anal muscles. The less you breathe, the more tense your body, pelvic floor and anus will be, making it difficult to penetrate and painful. You dont need that! 7. Again, slow down. Take your time, have external anal play before anything lubricated goes in your back door. When you are being penetrated, it must be slow and gentle, find the position that works for you. 8. Dont have a goal in mind, this is just for fun and pleasure and can be an amazing experience when mastered. I will reiterate that using a clitoral vibrator is the key to intense anal and orgasmic pleasure! @adventurersouls_

20.01.2022 Post 6 - Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Pick a place outside the bedroom. Whether its the living room, the shower, the guest bedroom, the couch, or the car if youre feeling shmoodyyoull see each other in a whole new light. Research shows that expanding love-making outside the bedroom brings couples closer together, and increases feelings of sexual empowerment. Get to it! Be safe, but have TONS OF FUN! @aprettycoolhoteltour

20.01.2022 Post 2- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - So for your first night. I dont want you to touch each-others erogenous zones at all! I want you to get in bed naked, have my spotify sex playlist going (search Chantelle_otten_sexologist) and start by touching eachother in turns. Worship each other. Ask your partner, how does that feel?, where would you like me to focus on? harder pressure? Scratching? Kissing? try different techniques and pressures. This is about t...ouching and being touched two distinct activities. Instead of judging or evaluating, try to simply be and experience. Notice whats happening in terms of physical feelings. By simply noticing how your partners skin feels (smooth, rough, warm, moist) you avoid evaluating and are able to simply focus on the experience. The receiving partner should, however, speak up if the person who is the toucher does something physically or psychologically uncomfortable. Here are some games to play during this stage (try to go for 30 mins at least, 15 mins touching each person, if doing in turns) Play a texture awareness game. Notice differences in the surface texture of skin on different parts of the body. How does the texture on the cheeks compare to the backs of the hands, calves, or neck? Which skin is especially silky or supple? Vary the firmness and tempo of touch. Feel the difference between a long-drawn-out, touch and a slightly firmer and quicker touch. Switch to a staccato type of rhythm for a while, and then back to a smoother, more languorous touch. Does changing the tempo of your touch alter sensation? @mariemur See more

20.01.2022 Challlllange accepted!!! #womensupportingwomen I will always always always support my people Thank you @charlotte_chimes, @radiospacey and the other amazing women that nominated me

19.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 2- Some specific suggestions on types of power play games. Now, before you begin, I must reiterate that safe sexual play is a MUST and you and your partner need to be good communicators. Now, GAME ON! The first game is called The Guessing Game. It is easy and can be adjusted to your comfort level. The dominant partner (Dom) uses a blindfold on the submissive partner (Sub). When visuals are taken away, the Dom brings out the toolkit needed to stimulat...e the Subs body. These items have been agreed on before the experience (to avoid nasty surprises), and the level of pressure or pain has always been consented too. Some toys in the kit could be, a feather, a paddle, candle wax, an ice cube, nipple clamps or a pinwheel. I like to grab one of the @lovehoneyau kits for these nights, because they contain everything you need. Just search bondage kit on the website (my fave is the Kinky Couple Mega Bondage Kit). The game is on, and as the dom is using these, the sub must guess what that item is! If the sub gets it right, they get a reward (e.g. neck kisses), if they get it wrong they get a punishment (e.g. a paddle slap on the ass). Ive put my lovehoney discount link in my bio! @killerandasweetthang See more

19.01.2022 Sexy Stories is now out! Swipe up on my stories to listen on Spotify or ITunes If you have any stories please email [email protected] Please show me some love on there and rate and subscribe

19.01.2022 To those who are flat or down, here are some suggestions from some angels on how to help (from everyones individual perspective). I spend every day, week in, week out, helping others with their health and happiness. And I go through the motions just like everyone else! I have for years, and Im so ok with that. Thank you everyone for your words and Im sending love to anyone who is going through anything right now

17.01.2022 Challlllange accepted!!! #womensupportingwomen I will always always always support my people Thank you @charlotte_chimes, @radiospacey and the other amazing women that nominated me

17.01.2022 So I did an a Q&A with @mamamiaaus the other day and I wanted to include it in these posts because it is a topic that is coming up at the moment! My boyfriend really wants to have anal and Im terrified. Ive heard horror stories. Is it scary? It is...messy? Is it something everyone does? Beautiful thing, there is nothing to fear! People love telling horror stories over pleasure stories, but I am going to teach you how to make anal sex smooth, safe and sexy. Firstly, its... essential to know some basic anatomy. Everyones anus is equipped with a bunch of sensitive nerve endings, making the experience feel different from vaginal sex. And every anus has an internal and an external sphincter, which controls the poo exiting the body. The inner sphincter moves involuntarily to keep the poop in, while the external is voluntary (you control whether it relaxes or tenses). Now, sex should never be painful (unless it is consensual and kinky), and if it is, we need to reassess the actions being taken. For people who feel like anal sex is too intense, they are unaware of the internal sphincter, which is a little hidden barrier, and if it isnt relaxed, it may make anal uncomfortable or too intense. So what needs to happen for your first time having anal (or anytime having anal), is that you must be relaxed in the body and mind so that all these internal protectors can welcome you in. See more

17.01.2022 Post 5- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Tonight is about recreating intimacy from early on in your relationship. Research shows that nostalgia can literally revive relationships. Play a song that evokes your early years together, break out some long-hidden lingerie, or use sexy pet names from when you first fell in love. OR my fave, have sex somewhere that you did back in the day, wherever that may be (if you can access it) for example, if you have a sneaky romp in a popular park after a date ;) go back there (of course this is not for anyone who is in lockdown right now, so park this idea and recreate a night that you had at home!) @endlesslyloveclub

16.01.2022 Hi! Its me. Your sexologist Chantie. I have LOVED receiving your erotic experiences and sharing them anonymously, and I want to take it to another level. I would love you receive emails with your erotic stories in long- form... So I can read them out via recordings and inspire others with your hot hot hot experiences. Of course, everyones stories will be kept anonymous, and I would suggest using made-up names etc. But consider sharing your story as a gift to society. If you... have one to share- email [email protected] Emails that are SUPER long and written in erotic story form will be accepted. I like the structure outlined in the article: jerichowriters.com/sex-scene-tips-Anastasia-Parkes Please read this before sending in to me! Cant wait to share all your hard work with you

16.01.2022 Now, is it messy? A lot of the time, no. So there is no need to worry about something that may not happen at all. Avoid anal if you have an upset stomach or feel bloated, but also accept that accidents may just happen! And thats totally normal. Sex is messy in general, thats what makes it so real, so dont be too hard on yourself if something goes wrong. Just have baby wipes nearby, wipe down, shower off and have a cuddle. For optimal anal experience, I recommend the follo...wing steps: Lets drop that body and that mind into relaxation. Anal sex and being tense is not going to work. Its important to spend some quality self-care time relaxing. Having a hot Epson bath or shower, meditating and asking for a sensual massage to drop you into the experience. I always think its good to have a sexy playlist going to set the mood. And if you feel like your anal muscles are too tight, you can do a reverse kegel for the backdoor! Pull the butt muscles up towards your belly button, then release them. 2. Communication is key. Make sure your partner is aware that you are nervous and discuss how to take it slow. They can give you a full body massage, for example, touch around the external part of the anus and communicate about how it feels. With all types of sexual interactions, you should be discussing before and during the activity. Especially about any hesitations, you feel and then the speed, depth and movements of the activity. When your partner is playing with that area, get them to tell you what they are doing, because you dont want any surprises! @twothirdshoney

15.01.2022 Sexuality on a spectrum part 3 Think about your fatigue and look at your health and wellness. Make the commitment to yourself that you will find a way to manage your fatigue so that it does not interfere with a good - enough sex life. If you are feeling so bad that you are not able to be intimate with your partner to a level that you can compromise to, its important to rule out medical issues around low thyroid, hormones or vitamin and mineral deficiencies. Look at your di...et. Are you feeling healthy? Do you eat enough protein and nutrients? Do you get enough physical activity? Are you getting a minimum of seven hours of sleep per night? Taking care of your own wellness and health can make a significant difference in your energy level and interest in sex. It also important to manage time at home better. You will need your spouses help with this. If you have children, get them to bed earlier. While one spouse cleans up after dinner let the more tired one take a bath, relax or read a magazine. Take time to release stress so sex does not become one more chore at the end of the day. Pick a time that you both will be finished working (including work details, laundry and e-mails) so you dont just fall into bed. Turn off the TV or computer at an agreed upon time. If your career or housework or childcare continue to take precedence over your sex life, its no wonder you are too exhausted for sex. If you have sex only at the end of the night, you may end up choosing sleep over sex on a regular basis @jacquemus

15.01.2022 Post 8 - Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - The last night. Make this night about doing whatever you like! Afterwards, have an open conversation about your physical intimacy, and how you will continue on the momentum you’ve built over the past week. A snuggle after sex and making some commitments to your sex life will enhance your relationship, your connection and your relational satisfaction. Fix the sex fix the relationship! Other benefits of pillow talk include higher sexual self-esteem, more pleasure, and less apprehension. I hope it worked well for you! Shoot me a comment or DM about your experience! @periodaisle

14.01.2022 I have spent the last few days observing the devastating acts of racism and racist attitudes that have occurred in the US. Being fully aware that I am a white, cis woman, who has never experienced discrimination because of my skin colour. I found it important to listen to my friends and patients who have experienced racism and educate myself further on a world that continues to devalue the lives of POC. I stand. And I cannot look away from these heinous crimes and I encourag...e you not to either. Call out racism and especially systematic racism on all levels that continues to thrive in Australia and across the world. I will continue to act beyond social media, educate myself further and challenge discrimination on all levels. Ill admit. I havent done enough. But I promise to do better.

14.01.2022 EVERYONE IT’S NATIONAL ORGASM DAY SO GET YOUR KITS OFF AND GRAB YOUR BOO OR YOUR TOYS AND ENJOY YOURSELF YAY! If you want to treat yourself, my @lovehoneyau discount link is in my bio and woohoo, go off!!!

13.01.2022 Post 3- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Day 2, how did your first night go? Did you discuss afterward? Take what you learnt from day 1 into day 2, because you basically have foreplay down pat! Day 2. Figure out if the time worked for you, and then either go the same time or pick a new time! Today, we are going to be doing the same as day 1, but, after a good 10 mins working on eachothers bodies, you will ask if you can touch the other person in an erogenous zone ...(boobs, genitals, anus, etc). Try and do this without kissing to start, and really pay attention to your sensations in the context of exploring your partners body as a sensual, sensory tactile experience. If the impulse toward sexual touch is overwhelmingly tempting, think back and try to repeat some of what you learned in the previous day. Slow things down. Feel the curve of your partners back and compare it to the contour of their hips; trace along the edge of their spine and see how this feels compared to the softer tissue on the back of their upper arms. Run your fingers through their hair as though feeling its texture and thickness for the first time. As the toucher continues a general exploration of the receivers body, add a new twist to enhance nonverbal communication. The person receiving the touch (receiver) can put a hand on top of the person touching (touchers) hand as they continue exploration. The intention of this hand-ridingtechnique is not for the receiver to suddenly take the lead in directing the action but to actually provide a simple, quick, effective way to show the toucher where to touch and to be connected, this is as you both explore your sensual side in a non-goal-orientated manner! With the hand-riding technique, the receiver can show a partner where they like a firmer touch, where theyd like to linger, etc. The receiver can also indicate when a slower touch might be especially sensual, or when to move from one part of the body to another. Add in gentle breast caressing, and genital touch, hand play, oral sex, with no goal of orgasm, but just to have a great time! The range of sensual experiences will be expanded. See more

13.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 4- Names, names, names. What would you call a dom? Master? Daddy? Zaddy? Boss? Miss? Mistress? Queen? Angel? What about the sub? Kitten? Babygirl? Good girl? Princess? You tell me! Its always great to incorporate some names that separate you from your everyday life into your boudoir life. That allows you to drop into character. And please, dress the part! You want a hot outfit, @lovehoneyau has heaps for all genders and sizes. One of the easiest powe...r play games to play, is allowing the dom to pick what the sub wears. That could be during erotic play, or out for the day, or for long periods of time. That can include hot lingerie, role-play outfits, accessories, or a nude sub for the day. So, if you see me at the shops in a french maids outfit, you know Ive been following my own advice! Do you have a fantasy youve wanted to try? @cocaineslim See more

13.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 5- One of my favourite games. ‘Surprise Demands’. Ah! I'm feeling the heat from this one. There are so many different ways of playing this game, but basically the dom has to surprise the sub with a list of personal requirements that the sub has to complete by the time the Dom gets home. This can be left in a written list, sent as a text, voice message or email. An example could be, I’m going for an hours walk, by the time I get back, I want you to be ...showered, wearing the outfit in the bag i’ve left on the bed for you, be on all fours on the floor, with blindfold on, and a bucket of ice next to you. This can of course, become more elaborate, with a treasure hunt, but let’s master the sexy basic’s first. Long distance lovers can play this game too, and be waiting on Zoom for their lover to come home, in the nude, with a bluetooth controlled toy next to them. The sub can also be given specific instructions not to orgasm, while the dom plays with the intensity levels on the controls. You can get toys for all genders, such as an app controlled male masturbator, or an app controlled g-spot vibrator the choices and opportunities are endless! My code for @lovehoneyau is in my profile, go search ‘bluetooth’ on the site to see all the options. @ninmagazine_2 See more

12.01.2022 Sexologist / Doggie stage mum

11.01.2022 Post 3- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Day 2, how did your first night go? Did you discuss afterward? Take what you learnt from day 1 into day 2, because you basically have foreplay down pat! Day 2. Figure out if the time worked for you, and then either go the same time or pick a new time! Today, we are going to be doing the same as day 1, but, after a good 10 mins working on eachothers bodies, you will ask if you can touch the other person in an erogenous zone ...(boobs, genitals, anus, etc). Try and do this without kissing to start, and really pay attention to your sensations in the context of exploring your partner’s body as a sensual, sensory tactile experience. If the impulse toward sexual touch is overwhelmingly tempting, think back and try to repeat some of what you learned in the previous day. Slow things down. Feel the curve of your partner’s back and compare it to the contour of their hips; trace along the edge of their spine and see how this feels compared to the softer tissue on the back of their upper arms. Run your fingers through their hair as though feeling its texture and thickness for the first time. As the toucher continues a general exploration of the receiver’s body, add a new twist to enhance nonverbal communication. The person receiving the touch (receiver) can put a hand on top of the person touching (toucher’s) hand as they continue exploration. The intention of this hand-ridingtechnique is not for the receiver to suddenly take the lead in directing the action but to actually provide a simple, quick, effective way to show the toucher where to touch and to be connected, this is as you both explore your sensual side in a non-goal-orientated manner! With the hand-riding technique, the receiver can show a partner where they like a firmer touch, where they’d like to linger, etc. The receiver can also indicate when a slower touch might be especially sensual, or when to move from one part of the body to another. Add in gentle breast caressing, and genital touch, hand play, oral sex, with no goal of orgasm, but just to have a great time! The range of sensual experiences will be expanded. See more

11.01.2022 Post 2- Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - So for your first night. I don’t want you to touch each-other's erogenous zones at all! I want you to get in bed naked, have my spotify sex playlist going (search Chantelle_otten_sexologist) and start by touching eachother in turns. Worship each other. Ask your partner, how does that feel?, where would you like me to focus on? harder pressure? Scratching? Kissing? try different techniques and pressures. This is about t...ouching and being touched two distinct activities. Instead of judging or evaluating, try to simply be and experience. Notice what’s happening in terms of physical feelings. By simply noticing how your partner’s skin feels (smooth, rough, warm, moist) you avoid evaluating and are able to simply focus on the experience. The receiving partner should, however, speak up if the person who is the toucher does something physically or psychologically uncomfortable. Here are some games to play during this stage (try to go for 30 mins at least, 15 mins touching each person, if doing in turns) Play a texture awareness game. Notice differences in the surface texture of skin on different parts of the body. How does the texture on the cheeks compare to the backs of the hands, calves, or neck? Which skin is especially silky or supple? Vary the firmness and tempo of touch. Feel the difference between a long-drawn-out, touch and a slightly firmer and quicker touch. Switch to a staccato type of rhythm for a while, and then back to a smoother, more languorous touch. Does changing the tempo of your touch alter sensation? @mariemur See more

11.01.2022 Hiiii! Post 1 of Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - I have an idea for all of you with sexual partners and maybe you will think Im crazy, or maybe youll just go yeah, great idea!. I want you to try an experiment I want you to priorotize having sex(ual) activity for 7 days in a row, and see how it goes for your relationship. Now, for those who are having sexual functioning problems, please adapt this so you dont compromise your sexual comfort. For tho...se with sexual pain, please have outercourse! No penetration activities! Having sex for seven nights wont kill you. As a team, if you are going to be successful, you have to work together and lay out the terms. Agreed to try and have sex each night before you go to bed, or every morning when you wake up, or (my fave) before dinner and netflix for seven days in a row. Sounds pretty easy, but it isnt! If you are going to do this successfully, you need to work backward as a team. Help each other getting dinner served, cleaning up, and having a few moments for yourselves to get organized and then, time for each other. Have an honest discussion about the kind of sex you are having. Be brave, I know for a lot of people, in order to get in the mood to really want to have the sex, you need some good foreplay, and in my opinion, every nice thing that you do for eachother is good before-sex foreplay, and in the bedroom, you need to take it slow! Night one starts tomorrow! @britishdreamgurl

10.01.2022 Side note about virginity In the 2017 Ted Talk by Norwegian doctors Nina Dlvik Brochmann and Ellen Stkken Dahl, the authors of The Wonder Down Under: A Users Guide to the Vagina put it: The truth has been known in medical communities for over a hundred years. Yet somehow, these [myths] continue to make life difficult for women around the world. These myths have been used as a powerful tool in the effort to control womens sexuality in about every culture, religion, an...d historical decade. Women are still mistrusted, shamed, harmed, and in the worst cases, subjected to honor killings if they dont bleed on their wedding night. Other women are forced into degrading virginity checks simply to get a job, defend their reputation, or to get married. Virginity checks are a gross procedure that is conducted by a doctor, who checks inside the vagina to see if the persons hymen is broken or torn. In some cultures, if the person is thought to have had sex before marraige or if they have been thought to have committed adultary, they are killed. In patriarchal societies, activities of women and girls are monitored, with their virginity and sexual purity seen as the responsibility of her male relatives. Those who are alleged to have engaged in sexually immoral activities are subject to honour, or shame killings. These killings are usually conducted by their family members because that person has brought shame and dishonour to the family or ventured outside of the principles of a religion or community with an honour culture. These crimes are suspected to be underreported, but the United Nations Population Fund estimates that there are up to 5000 of these deaths annually. So its important to debunk the virginity myth. It does exist. Lets save others having to get revirgination procedures, or from having to keep vials of blood in their pockets to pour on their wedding sheets. @olifreuler

09.01.2022 Post 7 - Plan an erotic date night. The challenge is almost over, so please dont give up yet! Instead, elevate the romance by planning a dreamy date night that brings you back to your dating days. Studies show that date nights actually increase sexual satisfaction in both men and women, so expect great things. I would suggest that you both do the Love Languages quiz! 5lovelanguages.com and found out the way your sexual partner likes to receive love maybe its words of affirmation (you are amazing, you are doing a great job etc), maybe its gifts (I bought you this sex toy/ lingerie)... and see if that elevates the night. I suggest cooking something together in the nude, or playing dom/sub, and use some of the games I suggested last week!

09.01.2022 Sexual Pain Series Part 2: Some symptoms of vaginismus: Burning or stinging with tightness during sex Difficult or impossible penetration, entry pain, uncomfortable insertion of penis Unconsummated marriage Ongoing sexual discomfort or pain following childbirth, yeast/urinary infections, STDs, IC, hysterectomy, cancer and surgeries, rape, menopause, or other issues... Ongoing sexual pain of unknown origin, with no apparent cause Difficulty inserting tampons or undergoing a pelvic/gynecological exam Spasms in other body muscle groups (legs, lower back, etc.) and/or halted breathing during attempts at intercourse Avoidance of sex / lower desire due to pain and/or failure If you feel like you relate to these symptoms, you are not alone. Infact, 1 in 5 women will feel this at some point in their life. If the pain is persistent, then please dont put up with it. Even if you have been trying to treat it for a while, there are really effective ways to work with your mind on the cycle of pain, and boosting sexual satisfaction that is not penetrative while you are going through treatment. Book a session with one of my team, we work with Dora @physio.with.dora our pelvic floor physiotherapist (who does online seshies too!) to help retrain your pelvic floor and, more importantly, your mind around sex. www.chantelleotten.com @twothirdshoney

09.01.2022 Hey babes! So I have done a little vid with our team pelvic floor physio @physio.with.dora who is a superstar! We will do another soon. And I will get better at video editing! To book an appointment with us head to www.chantelleotten.com or www.aissm.com.au YAY I apologise for not having subtitles in this video, but will get a transcript to add to this ASAP

07.01.2022 My online courses- the sexual self esteem course and the premature ejaculation course are 25% off with code EOFY Valid for 48 hrs! Link in bio x @discodaydream

07.01.2022 Post 6 - Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Pick a place outside the bedroom. Whether it’s the living room, the shower, the guest bedroom, the couch, or the car if you’re feeling shmoodyyou’ll see each other in a whole new light. Research shows that expanding love-making outside the bedroom brings couples closer together, and increases feelings of sexual empowerment. Get to it! Be safe, but have TONS OF FUN! @aprettycoolhoteltour

07.01.2022 I want to talk about the Vaginal Corona (also called the hymen) Hymen is the term commonly used to refer to the vaginal corona. The word Hymen actually comes from the greek hymn-nos which stands for skin, membrane. It is also the name of the Greek god of marriage, Hymenaios, who was seen as a young person carrying a torch and veil, who led the procession to protect the wedding rite. The hymen is just a little piece of tissue it has no purpose. But in many cultures, th...e hymen was and is still used as a sign of virginity. This has been happening for centuries, with the belief that the hymen is a piece of tissue that stretches across the vagina like a seal. The myth is, that it breaks and bleeds the first time vaginal sex happens, then is damaged and disappears afterwards. The truth is, the hymen is not a seal, it is just a bit of tissue. It has no purpose and does not accurately reflect on virginity. It is a rim of tissue at the outer opening of the vagina. It does not pop or break (so remove the message of *popping your cherry*), it doesnt necessarily bleed during a persons first intercourse. Infact, bleeding could come from a tear inside the vagina its, but most people can easily have sex for the first time without bleeding. It is a rim of tissue at the opening of the vagina that does not usually cover the vagina. Only in rare cases does a hymen cover the whole vaginal opening, as 97% of of hymens are open in the middle. People with full coverage have what we call an imperforate or microperforate hymen, and these people have cramps with menstruation but blood does not come out, leaning to doctors surgically opening the hymen so menstruation can come out and other things are let in! This myth about the hymen having to break on first sexual intercourse has fed into our unhealthy view of virginity, and also discounts the experience of those who have sex vulva on vulva. According to the definition of vaginal sex, these people would never lose their virginity, making the whole contruct faulty. @_nelly_london

07.01.2022 EVERYONE ITS NATIONAL ORGASM DAY SO GET YOUR KITS OFF AND GRAB YOUR BOO OR YOUR TOYS AND ENJOY YOURSELF YAY! If you want to treat yourself, my @lovehoneyau discount link is in my bio and woohoo, go off!!!

07.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 3- Referring to the Guessing Game above, you can variate it with the sub guessing what the Dom is going to do to their body next. This could be, what product, or an activity! Some activities could be: Getting spanked Being penetrated with a toy Receiving oral sex Getting a kiss... Getting a nibble The anticipation is the hero here, because the excitement of not knowing will be almost too much to bear! To continue adding to the intensity of this power play, you can take it to the next level by (consensually) taking away one or more of the subs senses at a time (touch, sight, hearing, smell and taste), because when one gets cut off, another gets heightened. You can tie the sub up, restricting movement or put in earplugs, or put a gag ball in their mouth (@lovehoneyau seduce me lovers bed bondage kit). As each sense gets cut off, the others get heightened. @pmagazine.co See more

07.01.2022 Sexual Pain Series Part 3: What is vaginismus? Vaginismus is vaginal tightness causing discomfort, burning, pain, penetration problems, or complete inability to have intercourse (like hitting a brick wall). The vaginal tightness results from the involuntary (meaning you dont want it to happen) tightening of the pelvic floor, especially the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle group (surrounding the vagina), although the woman (or trans man) may not be aware that this is the cause of he...r penetration or pain difficulties. Sexual pain can occur in any stage of life; even if that person has had years of comfortable sex. While temporarily experiencing discomfort during sexual intercourse is not unusual, ongoing problems should be diagnosed and treated. There are SO many causes, that I wont list them. But its my job and Doras job to help you recover from vaginismus with ease and support. Vaginismus is considered one of the most successfully treatable female sexual disorders. Many studies have shown treatment success rates approaching nearly 100%. Treatment resolution follows a manageable, step-by-step process. @physio.with.dora will address the physical side of things with the following exercises: breathing and mindfulness, pelvic floor relaxation techniques, massage and release techniques, pelvic stretches, dilators and training exercises. We work together to break the cycle of pain (see second slide), with my/my teams job to work on the psychological side. The emotional toll that it has on people is typically equal to, if not more intense than, the physical symptoms. Affecting self esteem, relationships, and overall quality of life. I love working with vaginismus sufferers to get to a place where they are confident and pain free, enjoying satisfying sexual lives. www.chantelleotten.com @kim_akrich

06.01.2022 Hiiii! Post 1 of Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - I have an idea for all of you with sexual partners and maybe you will think I’m crazy, or maybe you’ll just go ‘yeah, great idea!’. I want you to try an experiment I want you to priorotize having sex(ual) activity for 7 days in a row, and see how it goes for your relationship. Now, for those who are having sexual functioning problems, please adapt this so you don’t compromise your sexual comfort. For tho...se with sexual pain, please have outercourse! No penetration activities! Having sex for seven nights won't kill you. As a team, if you are going to be successful, you have to work together and lay out the terms. Agreed to try and have sex each night before you go to bed, or every morning when you wake up, or (my fave) before dinner and netflix for seven days in a row. Sounds pretty easy, but it isn't! If you are going to do this successfully, you need to work backward as a team. Help each other getting dinner served, cleaning up, and having a few moments for yourselves to get organized and then, time for each other. Have an honest discussion about the kind of sex you are having. Be brave, I know for a lot of people, in order to get in the mood to really want to have the sex, you need some good foreplay, and in my opinion, every nice thing that you do for eachother is good before-sex foreplay, and in the bedroom, you need to take it slow! Night one starts tomorrow! @britishdreamgurl

05.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 4- Names, names, names. What would you call a dom? Master? Daddy? Zaddy? Boss? Miss? Mistress? Queen? Angel? What about the sub? Kitten? Babygirl? Good girl? Princess? You tell me! It’s always great to incorporate some names that separate you from your everyday life into your boudoir life. That allows you to drop into character. And please, dress the part! You want a hot outfit, @lovehoneyau has heaps for all genders and sizes. One of the easiest powe...r play games to play, is allowing the dom to pick what the sub wears. That could be during erotic play, or out for the day, or for long periods of time. That can include hot lingerie, role-play outfits, accessories, or a nude sub for the day. So, if you see me at the shops in a french maid’s outfit, you know I’ve been following my own advice! Do you have a fantasy you’ve wanted to try? @cocaineslim See more

05.01.2022 Sexy Stories is now out! Swipe up on my stories to listen on Spotify or ITunes If you have any stories please email [email protected] Please show me some love on there and rate and subscribe

05.01.2022 Sexuality on a spectrum part 2 I want to talk about not being in the mood because of exhaustion. Firstly, its totally normal, being fatigued is a leading reason for people having less sex! But Im asking you, do you really want to be one of those low-sex couples? If you do, totally fine. If you dont, I have tips for you. Because once couples get out of the habit and ritual of having eroticism with each other, they lose an opportunity to have fun, pleasure, intimacy, connect...ion and closeness. My advice is, follow the 10 minute rule. If you are not in the mood, let your sexual partner know that you are willing to fool around and give it 10 minutes. Allow yourself to drop into the situation and see what happens. Usually in these situations there is one person who is amorous and wants to have sex, and another who is not interested unless they start fooling around and kissing, then they may have responsive arousal (i.e. their body starts responding to the touch). Give it a go. Its like going to the gym, you might not want to go, but after a little bit of time you can get into it, and then you dont regret going! Next time you are tired, try kissing and playing and see if your interest starts to change. Remembering that you dont have to have a full 3-course-meal sexual experience, you might be warmed up enough to have outercourse play!

03.01.2022 50 shades of laid- Part 5- One of my favourite games. Surprise Demands. Ah! Im feeling the heat from this one. There are so many different ways of playing this game, but basically the dom has to surprise the sub with a list of personal requirements that the sub has to complete by the time the Dom gets home. This can be left in a written list, sent as a text, voice message or email. An example could be, Im going for an hours walk, by the time I get back, I want you to be ...showered, wearing the outfit in the bag ive left on the bed for you, be on all fours on the floor, with blindfold on, and a bucket of ice next to you. This can of course, become more elaborate, with a treasure hunt, but lets master the sexy basics first. Long distance lovers can play this game too, and be waiting on Zoom for their lover to come home, in the nude, with a bluetooth controlled toy next to them. The sub can also be given specific instructions not to orgasm, while the dom plays with the intensity levels on the controls. You can get toys for all genders, such as an app controlled male masturbator, or an app controlled g-spot vibrator the choices and opportunities are endless! My code for @lovehoneyau is in my profile, go search bluetooth on the site to see all the options. @ninmagazine_2 See more

03.01.2022 Post 6 - Seven days of sensual activity challenge! - Pick a place outside the bedroom. Whether it’s the living room, the shower, the guest bedroom, the couch, or the car if you’re feeling shmoodyyou’ll see each other in a whole new light. Research shows that expanding love-making outside the bedroom brings couples closer together, and increases feelings of sexual empowerment. Get to it! Be safe, but have TONS OF FUN! @aprettycoolhoteltour

03.01.2022 Reposting! I want to talk about the Vaginal Corona (also called the hymen) Hymen is the term commonly used to refer to the vaginal corona. The word Hymen actually comes from the greek hymen-enos which stands for skin, membrane. It is also the name of the Greek god of marriage, Hymenaios, who was seen as a young person carrying a torch and veil, who led the procession to protect the wedding rite.... The hymen is just a little piece of tissue it has no purpose. But in many cultures, the hymen was and still is used as a sign of virginity. This has been happening for centuries, with the belief that the hymen is a piece of tissue that stretches across the vagina like a seal. The myth is, that it breaks and bleeds the first time vaginal sex happens, then is damaged and disappears afterwards. The truth is, the hymen is not a seal, it is just a bit of tissue. It has no purpose and does not accurately reflect on virginity. It is a rim of tissue at the outer opening of the vagina. It does not pop or break (so remove the message of *popping your cherry*), it doesnt necessarily bleed during a persons first intercourse. Infact, bleeding could come from a tear inside the vagina, but most people can easily have sex for the first time without bleeding. It is a rim of tissue at the opening of the vagina that does not usually cover the vagina. Only in rare cases does a hymen cover the whole vaginal opening, as 97% of of hymens are open in the middle. People with full coverage have what we call an imperforate or microperforate hymen, and these people have cramps with menstruation, but blood does not come out, leading to doctors surgically opening the hymen so menstruation can come out and other things are let in! This myth about the hymen having to break on first sexual intercourse has fed into our unhealthy view of this construct called virginity, and also discounts the experience of those who have sex vulva on vulva. According to the definition of vaginal sex, these people would never lose their virginity, making the whole construct faulty. @ninmagazine

02.01.2022 What a magical weekend