Coorow Hardware in Coorow, Western Australia | Agriculture

Coorow Hardware

Locality: Coorow, Western Australia

Phone: +61 8 9952 1033

Address: Shire of Coorow 6515 Coorow, WA, Australia

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• Agriculture

23.01.2022 For sale, one son, cheap!!! Coorow Hardware and reject shop has a little story to tell. Only this one is a little closer to home, about 20 kilometres. On a day not long past (Monday), A weary traveller was returning from the metropolis, loaded to the eyeballs with gifts and presents for all, when the unfortunate happened.... The go go mobile ran out of go go juice, needless to say he was on top of the situation. Time to reach out to loved ones for assistance. With 1 phone call to the war office to tell of the indignation of the bloody fuel gauge obviously reading faulty, all would be sorted. Only to find that her Hitler was out on military exercises and practising to recapture Poland and wouldnt be home for 15 minutes. But dearest informs said person ,dont fear, son no 3 is home and he will be able to take command. On the blower to Spawn of Satan several times, before he returns any of the 27 messages ( it is one of lifes great mysteries how they are on the bloody thing 26 hours a day unless you are trying to get them). After telling the man child of the situation and whats needed, get a can from the shed, make sure its not petrol,your mother will be there in 2 minutes, 20 kms from town, etc. Sorted, saved by the nearest and dearest, like a well oiled machine. The joy to see them arrive and save the day. The grateful but weary courier was sooooo happy to see the... wait for it... 2 lt of diesel he brought with him. Yes the vehicle did run out of fuel again. Arent they just wonderful little darlings. So the next time your in the shop, see if you can find a 2 lt fuel can

21.01.2022 it has been drawn to my attention that it has been a while since Coorow Hardware has posted anything and the public pressure is getting too much to bear. So having nothing really constructive to say, it is a prime opportunity to pull the piss out of someone. Lets See.... Once upon a time, just prior to Festivus Day, We here at Coorow Hardware and Adult Shop, where humbled to make the acquaintance of a weary traveler from the North. We believe she called herself Fuddy ( or pro...bably should have). Anyway this affable and intoxicating personality,deemed that she wanted to surprise hubby for Xmas or his birthday or both, ( I think she called him Block?). We where a little concerned with her request as it was full of language that would make a sailor blush, of what she thought would be a pleasure for hubby and herself to share and enjoy. " Its got too be big and black. Its got to be the biggest one you can get and not one of those little baby ones! Needs to be able to be locked away when not used. Will want a hood to go over it. Must have trolley so we can move it around. I want him to sweat and slave over it, and he can do all the work for a change". Hell,what an order. "Also going to need any accessories to strap to it that you can find" Starting to get a little scared now, but wondering if we may be able to bundle the stripper pole into the deal. "Oh i need it on lay- buy, (which I am really hoping doesn't mean "try before you buy") and you will need to keep it in store until i am ready to share it with him" Not a problem for Coorow Hardware and Storage Facility. 24th of December arrives and sure enough, she's back. We load up the gift and shes on her way with hubbies new toy. She excited like a kid in a lolly shop. So excited in fact, she drives off without paying. Strange mob, them Northerners.

18.01.2022 Easter Hours Friday and Monday closed. Saturday and Sunday normal hours.

17.01.2022 FRIDGES FOR XMAS. GET THEM NOW

16.01.2022 Coorow Hardware would like to apologise for any confusion regarding trading hours. We are not open 24 hours. It seems we have been hacked and as a result a few things have been changed on the page. Dont worry, nothing has changed from our end. We are still the same rude, ungrateful bastards. We will rectify the changes as we find them.

16.01.2022 Here at Coorow Hardware and Machinery we have closely been monitoring the outbreak of the coronavirus (COVID-19) since it was first reported in Wuhan, China. The health and safety of our team is our highest priority. We couldn't give a sh.t about you unless you haven't paid your bill. Therefore, as a business we feel it is our duty of care to proactively put in place measures ensuring the well being of us.... As of today, March 18, we will be enlisting the below protocols. As a valued client, please take note of the following: We reserve the right to spray Glen 20 in your face on arrival, or Metho if we run out. We will take your cash and charge you a sanitising fee, tazer you with a cattle prod if you cough, refuse service, if we don't like you or suspect you are carrying anything that you aren't willing to pay for. We do not apologize for our demeanour or rudeness in this matter. If you don't like it then p!ss off and shop at Bunnings. Our reception and sales counter at our head office in Coorow WA is open for customers entering the building. Please call in advance to speak to our customer service team on 99 521033 to discuss your toilet paper requirements and we will provide solutions,( we will have specials running shortly on sand paper so i suggest starting with the 1200 grit and working your way down the numbers.) Our service department is currently remaining open. We will advise if this changes. If you need to visit our service department our staff have been briefed on minimising ANY physical interactions, and practising social distancing for the safety of all and to prevent any long term psychological damage if seen being caught in the act of physical interaction. Until further notice we are limiting face to face contact with unattractive people. If this is you, please contact us via phone or email.

15.01.2022 According to my version, and I got it from a reliable source who was there at the time. On the eighth day God created BEER. The magic elixir that makes men funny and women attractive. Not one to go against the good word, we here at Coorow Hardware and Bible Class are offering until Christmas these portable fridges at ridiculously low prices. All of them go down to minus 20 c. So Cheap you need to buy 2. Apparently you can use them for items other than beer, but I'm not sure about that. Do so at your own risk.

15.01.2022 Here at Coorow Hardware and Transport, we have 1 slightly imperfect fridge/freezer that normally we would ask about $900 for this 366 litre monster. Painted in white with some silver undertones. Today on special for $300. Comes fully attached with character. 1 of a kind, fully functioning.... how do we do it so cheap? It fell off a truck, of course. See more

09.01.2022 EASTER TRADING HOURS. Just when the crew thought they would get a break. PIGS ASS... Saturday 7.30 to 12.30 Sunday 8.30 to 12 Monday 7.30 to 4

09.01.2022 SANITISING SPRAY!! Coorow Hardware has done it again... Finally! The lying, cheating, threatening deals that needed to be done to procure this unicorn can never be spoken or appreciated.... 70% alcohol, so i don't have to explain, not what to do with it, do I? 500 ml spray bottles just in time for Easter. Only Coorow Hardware, can,and will source the impossible. Dont ring and ask us to hold it for you please.

03.01.2022 Here at Coorow Hardware and Hire Service, we are please to announce that we are the latest members of Uhaul Australia. So what does this mean for you, the local? Well, say your in the big smoke, with the little lady and kiddies, when you see that Fat Boy (insert catholic priest joke here) that you have been searching for and dreaming about, (since she lost her humour). Got to have it there and then, but the wise one, points out that there is no way it will fit in the sedan w...ith the shopping and the kiddies, and no, she will not leave them behind. Dont panic, go to a U Haul yard and grab a trailer, put the missus and kids AND the car seats, on the trailer and stuff that pride and joy in the front of the Camry with you. When you get home get the missus to drop the trailer to Coorow Hardware and grab some chrome wax. Job done and everyone is happy. Maybe the Battle Axe has had some dear friend, graciously give here some overflow of 400 + pot plants, that would just look soooo lovely out the back under the gazebo, no worries. Off to Coorow Hardware to collect the timber. Got a trailer to suit the job. Usual Friday Night, Hubby going in for a couple of cold frothies over the wood, dont fear, plan ahead. Grab a car trailer with ramps. Roll him on. Best of both worlds, hes safe, you cant smell him and you cant hear his witty jokes. Next day get him to drop back the trailer and pick up another frying pan. Maybe just a simple dump run, no worries, got a trailer to suit. The synergies are endless at Coorow Hardware and Trailer hire. https://www.trailerrentals.com.au/

03.01.2022 Here at Coorow Hardware and Toiletry supplies, we have fresh unused stock of baby wipes, toilet paper, disinfectant, face masks, disposable gloves arriving later this week. Ring the shop to place orders. If you're desperate or dumb we might be able to supply some slightly used products at a discounted price.