Regina Sawyer | Education

Regina Sawyer

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25.01.2022 I went for a walk this morning and a stranger smiled and said hi to me. The combination of this small gesture, my morning coffee, and the sunshine peeking through the trees immediately sent a buzzing through my system. The euphoria picked me up and I smiled and said good morning to every person I saw for my 1 hr walk (including people in cars if I could get eye contact!). By the time I arrived home I was feeling high on life. The need for connection is imprinted in our DNA. O...ur brain is hardwired to reward us (with the feel-good high) whenever we connect with others, this includes non-human animals and the natural environment. Connection is so important to our survival that babies can live or die based on the amount of physical contact they receive. Why then do so many people feel they are not getting enough connection? In conversation with friends there is agreement that we are not meeting our daily quota of connection. Most feel time-poor and unable to fit more into their daily schedules. So connection gets put on the back burner, and met through 1-2hrs a week or fortnight intense catchups. It is never enough. We say that. Often. Grr. But the kids need to sleep. So until next time. Learning to recognise and prioritise our daily need for connection can yield incredible results. Increased energy, vitality, creativity, reduced stress, reduced depression, greater presence for ourselves and those around us. The kick on effects are numerous, from more relaxed and happy kids (yes, they feed off your energy), to a greater sense of meaning and purpose in life. By filling your own cup your create more space to consider the needs of others. So the next time you are feeling at a loss and not sure what to do with yourself, consider that you may be needing a dose of connection. Chuck on your shoes and get out into the world. Dont worry if you look daggy. The stranger who smiled at me this morning didnt seem to mind. -------- Becoming aware of our physical and emotional needs, and the needs of others, is one of the skills taught and practiced in the Parent Effectiveness Training course. www.parenttraining.com.au

24.01.2022 How very exciting! Welcome to my public page. The face of Surfcoast Psychology and Communicate Surfcoast. I am many things. For the past 6 years I have worked as a psychologist in the public mental health service. For the past 3 1/2 years I have become a mother to two beautiful boys. For the past 2 years my partner and I have lived in Jan Juc as members of the incredible, vibrant and beautiful surfcoast community. And now I have started my very own business. I am so excited t...o be commencing this new journey. I hope to use my position to share, inspire and support members of the surfcoast community (and, hopefully in the future, beyond) to find deeper meaning and satisfaction from all their relationships in life. Stay tuned for more information. Regina x

23.01.2022 Some thoughts on story telling.... :)

22.01.2022 Hmmm... I think I may be feeling the silly season a bit early.. because for some reason Ive been prompted to try and run 1 last course this year!!! Ive decided to put it out there because this may be EXACTLY what you needed - to finish the year on a high and filled with enthusiasm to start 2018 skilled up and ready to take on anything. Maybe its been a hard year - too much fighting - too little joy and love.... Maybe its been great year - but you know next year will be challenging - kids are getting older and youve heard what happens when they start high school - when they reach puberty. Maybe you think that doesnt have to be our family. That doesnt have to be our story. We can write our own story. Well I agree with you. And I want to support as many families as possible to write their own story. To overcome challenges - to heal - to grow. A little personal story. I have two young kids. And a few years ago I was feeling overwhelmed - stressed out - and seriously worried that we werent going in the direction I wanted for our family. It was feeling very robotic - we were saying and doing this we KNEW werent great - but we didnt KNOW any other way to deal with our problems. We were doing our best - but then I decided to try something a bit different. GO TO PARENT SCHOOL! It felt so strange. Gathering on a Sunday with a group of parents to learn how to... parent. Honestly - it was really outside my comfort zone - and it was admitting that things werent great. It made me realise how unusual it is in our culture to do parent classes - but immediately I could see how valuable it was. That was a few years ago - and things arent perfect - Because thats not life. BUT, we often get comments about how our son communicates differently to others. We KNOW what to do when things are working. We KNOW what steps to take to heal when things break. We are STRONGER as a family and our culture is more embracing of the needs of everyone. More respectful. More able to give and receive love. For these changes I am eternally grateful I had the opportunity to learn these skills. Now I am passionate about sharing them with the world. Contact me for a confidential discussion about how I might be able to assist you. Skype available. Warmest regards, Regina

20.01.2022 Am so excited to bring the incredible skills of Parent Effectiveness Training to the surfcoast. The opportunity to reduce stress and increase the vitality of your parenting is here! #myveryfirsthashtag #isthishowyoudoit #itlookscooldoesntit

18.01.2022 Less than 2 weeks until my first course starts!

18.01.2022 Just wanted to give a shout out to this amazing organisation and their work. The successful transition from childhood to adulthood is enormously important, and this type of work is a gift to the child, the family, and the community. Ive taken this quote from their website: Michael Meade wrote, If the fires that innately burn inside youths are not intentionally and lovingly added to the hearth of community, they will burn down the structures of culture, just to feel the warm...th. An eloquent and significant statement. It seems that programs are run out of Melbourne, however I am enquiring about the potential to have them available in the Surfcoast area. If you have children between 13-15 years of age seriously consider attending one of the camps with them. Warmest regards, Reg

17.01.2022 Hmmm... I think I may be feeling the silly season a bit early.. because for some reason I've been prompted to try and run 1 last course this year!!! I've decided to put it out there because this may be EXACTLY what you needed - to finish the year on a high and filled with enthusiasm to start 2018 skilled up and ready to take on anything. Maybe it's been a hard year - too much fighting - too little joy and love.... Maybe it's been great year - but you know next year will be challenging - kids are getting older and you've heard what happens when they start high school - when they reach puberty. Maybe you think that doesn't have to be our family. That doesn't have to be our story. We can write our own story. Well I agree with you. And I want to support as many families as possible to write their own story. To overcome challenges - to heal - to grow. A little personal story. I have two young kids. And a few years ago I was feeling overwhelmed - stressed out - and seriously worried that we weren't going in the direction I wanted for our family. It was feeling very robotic - we were saying and doing this we KNEW weren't great - but we didn't KNOW any other way to deal with our problems. We were doing our best - but then I decided to try something a bit different. GO TO PARENT SCHOOL! It felt so strange. Gathering on a Sunday with a group of parents to learn how to... parent. Honestly - it was really outside my comfort zone - and it was admitting that things weren't great. It made me realise how unusual it is in our culture to do parent classes - but immediately I could see how valuable it was. That was a few years ago - and things aren't perfect - Because that's not life. BUT, we often get comments about how our son communicates differently to others. We KNOW what to do when things are working. We KNOW what steps to take to heal when things break. We are STRONGER as a family and our culture is more embracing of the needs of everyone. More respectful. More able to give and receive love. For these changes I am eternally grateful I had the opportunity to learn these skills. Now I am passionate about sharing them with the world. Contact me for a confidential discussion about how I might be able to assist you. Skype available. Warmest regards, Regina

16.01.2022 Has anyone seen this movie? https://minimalismfilm.com/ Ive been following the minimalism movement for some time now. Its appealed to me for a variety of reasons, and I thought it worthy of a shout-out as others may be on a similar path. For me, the appeal of minimalism is similar to the appeal of the slow movement. Raising awareness about how we live our lives and how that contributes to or diminishes our quality of life. ... It also ties in with the environmental movement and raising our awareness about how our purchase decisions are often collectively destroying natural environments and the lives of both human and non-human earth dwellers. It also ties in with the attachment and peaceful parent movements which raises awareness about the rights and needs of our children and how our lifestyles can support or undermine childrens self-determination and ability to reach their potential. It also ties in with the tiny house movement which I LOVE because it questions everything about what we think we need for a good life and offers the financial freedom we so often crave so we really can focus on our passions. The movie is a great overview of the movement and for those who are interested there are a number of facebook groups dedicated to supporting people on their journey towards minimalism. Take care, x Reg x

15.01.2022 Listening. Or why I decided to become a P.E.T. Instructor. As a psychologist, it is my job to listen to people. To hear not only their story, but to the untold story. That of how their experiences have shaped who they are, and how they interact with the world around them. I have been told that I am a good listener and have been praised by clients who felt I really heard and understood them in a way that nobody in their life had before. When I attended a parenting course earli...Continue reading

15.01.2022 The internet is filled with knowledge. If you want to know something it is as simple as a google search away. While doing some background research for my upcomi...ng P.E.T. course I found myself thinking - if all this incredible information is out there, why do so many of us still struggle with all manner of life problems? Physical health, addictions,emotional health, relationships, to a general lack of meaning and purpose in life. I have come to think (and am certainly not the first!) that there is a world of difference between "knowing" and "doing". Ask anyone with a weight problem and you will rarely find a lack of knowledge about what it takes to get to a healthy weight. Translating knowledge into action is challenging. It takes time. It takes practice. It takes a willingness to get it wrong and be in the learning space outside of our comfort zones. And in todays age, I think many people have been tricked by the ease of gaining knowledge. They think that because they can get answers to problems with the click of a button, 24/7, then it is just as simple to enact those solutions and solve their problems. No wonder rates of depression are on the rise. If people believe that they should be able to just change when presented with new information, then the realisation that they are not changing must deal a huge blow to their sense of self. They may come to believe that there is something wrong with them. Theres not. The truth is most people are doing the best that they can with the resources they have available to them. Remind yourself of this next time you get frustrated that your not changing fast enough. And remember that there are two parts to change - Yes, knowledge is needed. But then you need to start doing. A little bit, day by day. People often complain the P.E.T. course is very long. They are not sure they can commit 24 hours of their time to learning new skills. But it is long because we know that to set you up for success you need time to practice, be coached, and be supported by others to try out your new skills. This is why the P.E.T. course is one of the most successful parenting programs in the world. Learn more about the course at parenttraining.com.au Warm regards, Regina Sawyer p.s. Knowledge acquistion is still so important! It is how we learn what we need to change. This article on active listening with children is long but so good. Have a read and then try it out! http://centerforparentingeducation.org//the-skill-of-list/

14.01.2022 Expressing gratitude... I have recently enjoyed the pleasure of being lulled to sleep to the dulcet tones of Marshall Rosenberg reading his wonderful book Non-violent communication. I think I only last about 20 minutes before falling asleep. I employ the sleep timer so wake later with silent headphones on. Im on my second listening picking up the bits that no doubt I missed while falling asleep last time. He tells a story about an exchange with a student after giving a ...Continue reading

13.01.2022 Details for upcoming bookclub - feel free to share with anyone that might be in need of a boost in confidence to manage their relationship or problem-behaviours with a young person.

13.01.2022 Love this one :)

12.01.2022 A must watch for anyone that gets stressed out and then stressed out about being stressed out

10.01.2022 https://m.facebook.com/pages/Communicate/179295695809390?sk=allactivity¬if_id=1509408223043390¬if_t=page_wall&ref=notif

10.01.2022 Ive been a bit quiet as Ive been preparing to run my first parent training course...well today was my first class! Was great meeting some new people and sharing the fabulous skills in parent effectiveness training. 1 down, 7 sessions to go :)

10.01.2022 Being heard. This need is universal and incredibly underrated. In our interactions so often there is a clash of needs - where both sides of a conversation are o...ften unconsciously fighting for expression and resolution for their important needs. When we learn to catch ourselves doing this - and take a moment to allow - not only allow but embrace and welcome - the other to fully express themselves - we dramatically increase the likelihood that the other will return the favour and do the same for us. But if that is not enough for you, then you can also be explicit in your need - "Hey, I need someone to just listen to me so I can sort things out - are you able to do this?" or "Thanks for the suggestion but I dont really need ideas right now, Im confident Ill find the right solution if I can just speak out loud my thoughts - will you be my listener?" If you would like more tips on how to improve your own listening skills or to respectfully and gently guide others to become your listening buddies let me know! cheers, Regina

07.01.2022 This course is comprehensive (ie. LONG) but so worth it. It explains the science behind early brain development and all the ways that things can go wrong if the right conditions arent met for healthy brain development. It covers addiction in detail and helps explain the intergenerational nature of violence and addiction transmission. There is so much more but it will help you think about people problems in a different way (hopefully with more compassion and understanding) and help you consider how you might be part of the solution. Highly recommend.

04.01.2022 I didnt know where this was going when it first started. I wondered if it was going to be another cynical view of the world about just putting up with how overwhelming life can be at times. And then - bam! - he lays out the antidote to so many problems which involve avoidance of painful (and sometimes not painful, but just uncomfortable) emotions. I also *LOVE* this because he shares the message in such an accessible way.

04.01.2022 An updated flyer for my course with new dates and revised price. Please share if you know of anyone that may be interested! Cheers, Reg

02.01.2022 Another in my series highlighting the incredible works of Marshall Rosenberg (author of Non-Violent Communication). Many people do not recognise the significan...ce of this statement - You do not need to solve other peoples problems*. You do not need to rescue them. You need to trust in their innate ability to heal and thrive - given the right circumstances. And an essential component of that right circumstance is to have accepting and empathic others around you - giving you space to process your pain, to hear your own problems, and to work towards a solution - a solution that you generate and that you fully own. *Obviously there are caveats to this statement... but not to the extent that most people think, and to the extent that most people immediately jump in with solutions (and potentially get a bit cross when those genius ideas are not taken up)...

01.01.2022 Am seeing mixed reviews of ruok day. My impression has been that we often lack the skills to be the effective listener that people need. Hence people often don't open up about their challenges. If you want to improve your ability to be a positive helping agent in other other people's lives then seriously consider doing some study to improve your listening skills. It doesn't take much but will raise your awareness and you will start to notice how little people generally listen to each other.