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Skill Kids For Life

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25.01.2022 "Unconscious people don't want tea". This is one of my favorite videos about consensual sex. Please have this discussion with your kids from both sides of the consent line. Thank you for sharing Deputy David Gomez https://youtu.be/pZwvrxVavnQ

24.01.2022 Be creative in affirming and encouraging your children Try something different next time and write affirmations and love messages for your child on their pencils, erasers, bananas, post-it notes, bookmarks, etc. Remind them theyre strong, brave, and capable.

23.01.2022 Please share widely with parents and anyone who cares about children. Weve seen where some photos of children posted on social media end up. Child sexual expl...oitation on Instagram is rampant. Protecting your childs digital footprint starts with you. Review privacy settings and think carefully about what you share and where you share it. Read about why this is so important here: https://www.collectiveshout.org/facebook_sexploitation #Instagram #Facebook

23.01.2022 Snapchat has installed a secret picture vault in their application so that kids can hide pictures from parents. Boys will usually keep pictures of multiple fem...ale classmates in this vault and girls will usually have some of their panty/nude/sexy pictures in this vault ready to send to anyone they feel needs them. I know, who needs these pictures? As a parents, it's a good idea to find out what your kids are keeping and hiding from you in their secret picture vault. You might be saving a life (your own child or someone else's child) by checking this vault. So I have included some step by step instructions on how to get to the vault. How to check your kids Snapchat secret picture vault 1) Open the Snapchat application on their phone (yellow icon with white ghost). This will open up the main picture taking page, you should see live image ready to take a photo. 2) Below the take a picture button (large circle at bottom of the screen) there is a small icon that looks like two playing cards. Press the two playing cards icon. You will be in their memories photos which are some of the photos they have taken with Snapchat camera. 3) Along the top of the photos you should see some labels SNAPS, CAMERA ROLL, MEMORIES, and MY EYES ONLY. Press the MY EYES ONLY BUTTON 4) If you don't see MY EYES ONLY this means the MY EYES ONLY is not being used. If the phone pops up with a PIN entry keypad you will need the code from your kid. Standard answers when you ask your kid for their PIN is that they forgot or they never set it up. (see parental pin extraction techniques for further help if needed). 5) Once past the secret pin you will see the photos your kids usually don’t want you to see. Understand you are still not seeing the private disappearing snap chat messages they send back and forth to each other. Deputy Gomez

23.01.2022 More reading on non-violence, guidance and boundaries .... WHEN YOUR CHILD HITS YOU: A SCRIPT https://bit.ly/2GbRB8o... CHILD AUTONOMY: A GOOD RULE OF THUMB https://bit.ly/2M61NT2 PARENTING YOUR STRONG-WILLED CHILD https://bit.ly/37g6DFg NO IFS, ANDS, OR BUTS: SETTING LIMITS WITH EMPATHY https://bit.ly/384cIpI 8 STEPS TO HELP YOUR CHILD DEVELOP SELF-CONTROL https://bit.ly/3cVt1ae . Curious Parenting . . For support in your gentle parenting journey get your copy of the new Winter Issue 39 of The Natural Parent Magazine https://linktr.ee/TheNaturalParentMagazine

22.01.2022 During adolescence, our teens need our love, support and influence more than ever. What they dont need is our control. By adolescence, we dont have any anyway.... We might have the illusion of control, but the harder we push to control them, the more we risk losing them. Our teens are resourceful, creative and brave and if they want something enough they will do it anyway. . When we attempt to control them, we are pushing against thousands of years of evolution and their drive to explore their independence. They cant make the transition from childhood to adulthood without establishing some sort of separation from us. . They might push against us, and sometimes this will feel fierce. This is not to push us away, but to loosen themselves from under our wing. Sometimes the closer they are, the harder they have to push. And sometimes, in the quest for separation and independence, its our connection with them that gets lost. They have important work to do, so its up to us as their parents to hold on to that connection tightly enough for them and for us, for whenever they need it. They will come back, but first they have work to do and its okay if this takes time and tears and outside voices inside. Its a learning adventure for all of us. . . Whenever we can, we need to nurture the fire in them that is looking to discover who they are. We can do this by asking their opinions, listening more than talking, valuing their insight, and letting them to teach us what its like to be in their world. . The more we try to control them, the more we squander our precious opportunities to influence them. They are less likely to come to us if they expect lectures, preaching, shame, judgement or harsh consequences. When the connection with them is there, hopefully, sometimes, they will let us take the precious and privileged place beside them as they explore, learn and grow. So often, our greatest parenting moments and connection with them will happen in the middle of the mess, but first we need for them to offer us a seat at the table. See more

21.01.2022 My child sat down at the picnic table delightedly admiring the heaping sno-cone she held in her hand. Suddenly a look of worry came across her face. Do I have ...to rush, Mama? I could have cried. Here was my child simply wanting to enjoy her icy treat, but she feared she would have to eat quickly and perhaps not have time to finish it down to the last tasty drop. Hearing the word rush upon her small lips was disheartening, to say the least. But for many years, I lived life in a rush. Hurry up became a worn-out phrase in my daily vocabulary. As my child looked up at me waiting to know if she could take her time, I knew I had a choice. I could sit there in sorrow thinking about the number of times I rushed my child through life or I could celebrate the fact that today things are different. I chose to live in today. You dont have to rush. Just take your time, I said gently. Her whole face instantly brightened and her shoulders relaxed. And so we sat side-by-side talking about things that ukulele-playing-6-year-olds talk about. There were even moments when we sat in silence just smiling at each other and admiring the sights and sounds around us. I thought my child was going to eat the whole darn thingbut when she got to the last bite, she held out a spoonful of ice crystals and sweet juice for me. I saved the last bite for you, Mama, my daughter said proudly. As I let the icy goodness quench my thirst, I realized I just got the deal of a lifetime. I gave my child a little time and in return, she gave me her last bite and reminded me that things taste sweeter and love comes easier when we take pause in the busyness of life. Rachel Macy Stafford Despite what happened yesterday, today can be different. Let us take pause with someone we love so we can experience the simple moments that make life worth living. Thank you for being a part of The Hands Free Revolution letting go to grasp what really matters.

21.01.2022 Teaching children to listen to their instinct is the best tool we can arm them with.. Only 6% of child abuse is by a stranger (this is why stranger danger is not the main focus to be teaching ). And as parents, listen when your child says theyre scared - thats them using their words to verbalize their gut instinct & thats exactly what WE WANT.. It doesnt matter if its as simple as walking down a dark hallway - its big for them so honour it!

19.01.2022 Stereotypes and myths about who commits offences against children can impact safety. Many walk amongst us, in plain sight. Its why were so passionate about what we do, educating, equipping and empowering children and young people and those that care for and work with them. ... A Greens candidate who ran against Scott Morrison at the last election has been granted bail after being accused of directing and watching the live abuse of a child in the Philippines online ... The court also heard Mr Doig sent $129,224 to 97 beneficiaries in the Philippines over almost 10 years. - How many more victims have there been over the years?

18.01.2022 A great tool to teach our little ones. When you feel bad or angry or sad or frustrated, take a deep breath

16.01.2022 Be part of National Child Protection Week! More than 15 free webinars with 30+ inspiring speakers (national & international). #Playyourpart in the prevention of child abuse and neglect Register today!

15.01.2022 Some great advice here 1 - Say no to Snapchat. They will send or receive a nude picture eventually. They probably already have. They will also lie about this when you ask them. Many middle school kids do not have Snapchat - just in case they try to argue with your rule. (You’ll notice that the rest of these aren’t numbered. Right.) ... Tik Tok is full of nasty stuff and the f word. Parenting preteens/teens is not for the lazy. You cannot leave them for hours behind closed doors with phones, TVs, computers, or friends. If you’re not going to go through their texts, please don’t give them a phone. Screen Time on their iPhone should be enabled with a passcode before you ever hand it to them. It’s so easy to use. You can turn the internet off - even on a smart phone. If you find inappropriate garbage, turn it off. They cannot handle it. Friends in their grade are having sex. More than one friend. Talk to your kids. Stop bailing them out. Stop it. Let them fail. They will all mess up. Don’t freak out when they do - especially if they tried. Many middle schoolers are addicted to porn. Loads of them. CHECK THEIR PHONES. They are so desensitized to things that we thought were taboo. Tell them no. They lie. All kids. Yours and mine. They’ve already experienced peer pressure in some form. Like that kind. Ask them to be honest about it. JUULs. NO. Google it. They need coping skills. If stress and anxiety are controlling their thoughts, figure out how to help. This shouldn’t be their 24/7 way. Know their friends. This is everything. Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future. It’s true. Hold them accountable. Make them own up to their mistakes. Be involved in their schoolwork. Know their teachers. Know when they have tests. They are 12. They still need your guidance. I mostly see two kinds of kids in middle school: naive and far from it. Try to equip your kid to be somewhere in the middle. This happens by having the right kinds of conversations. Teach them to respect authority. All authority. They will love some adults and some they won’t. That’s life. Learn to deal with everyone in a kind and respectful way. Love them through the weird. They need love now - maybe more than ever. , Mrs. Phillips A Middle School Teacher

14.01.2022 Signe Whitson, a child and adolescent therapist, has a timely message for parents and educators: there is a real need to draw a distinction between behavior th...at is rude, behavior that is mean and behavior that is characteristic of bullying. In a HuffPost article, she clarifies the way she identifies the difference and asks adults to remember that distinguishing between them allows teachers, school administrators, police, youth workers, parents and kids all know what to pay attention to and when to intervene. Whitsons article was prompted by an encounter with a parent, who told her, Last week, my daughter was bullied really badly after school!" and then went on to describe what Whitson characterized as a benign encounter between playful children throwing leaves. She writes, While I always want to be careful not to minimize anyones experience... if kids and parents improperly classify rudeness and mean behavior as bullying -- whether to simply make conversation or to bring attention to their short-term discomfort -- we all run the risk of becoming so sick and tired of hearing the word that this actual life-and-death issue among young people loses its urgency as quickly as it rose to prominence." So how does Whitson define the differences? Rude, she says, is [i]nadvertently saying or doing something that hurts someone else. In children this takes the form of social errors like burping in someones face, jumping ahead in line, bragging about achieving the highest grade or even throwing a crushed up pile of leaves in someones face. The critical factor? Incidents of rudeness are usually spontaneous, unplanned inconsideration, based on thoughtlessness, poor manners or narcissism, but not meant to actually hurt someone. Being mean involves purposefully saying or doing something to hurt someone once (or maybe twice). Unlike unthinking rudeness, mean behavior very much aims to hurt or depreciate someone.Very often, mean behavior in kids is motivated by angry feelings and/or the misguided goal of propping themselves up in comparison to the person they are putting down. And while Whitson agrees that both rudeness and mean behavior require correction, they are different from bullying in important ways that should be understood and differentiated when it comes to intervention. Bullying is intentionally aggressive behavior, repeated over time, that involves an imbalance of power.Kids who bully say or do something intentionally hurtful to others and they keep doing it, with no sense of regret or remorse -- even when targets of bullying show or express their hurt or tell the aggressors to stop. Whitson gives examples of multiple kinds of bullying, including physical and verbal aggression, relational aggression (like social exclusion, hazing, or rumor spreading), and cyberbullying. The key aspect to all of them is the ongoing nature of the behavior, which leaves the victims feeling powerless and fearful. Whitson is pleased that, in the past few years, Americans have collectively paid attention to the issue of bullying like never before; millions of school children have been given a voice, 49 states in the U.S. have passed anti-bullying legislation, and thousands of adults have been trained in important strategies to keep kids safe and dignified in schools and communities. As we continue to improve our response to bullying, she asks all adults who interact with children to remember that a childs future may depend on a non-jaded adults ability to discern between rudeness at the bus stop and life-altering bullying. To read Signe Whitsons entire article on HuffPost, visit http://huff.to/1XIDuIT Whitson is also the author of the bullying prevention book for parents and educators, "8 Keys to End Bullying: Strategies for Parents & Schools" at http://www.amightygirl.com/8-keys-to-end-bullying To learn about our favorite bullying prevention books for children in preschool and early elementary-aged children, check out our blog post, "The End of Bullying Begins With Me": Bullying Prevention Books for Young Children," at http://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=10255 For books on this topic for tweens and tweens, check out our recommendations in "Taking a Stand Against Bullying: Bullying Prevention Books for Tweens and Teens" at http://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=10257 In our final post, we share resources for parents and educators to help them better understand childhood bullying and learn how best to respond to it: "Leading the Way: Bullying Prevention Books for Parents and Educators," at http://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=10259 We also recommend books to help teach your Mighty Girl how to be a good friend in our blog post: Making and Keeping Friends: Mighty Girl Books About Friendship at http://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=10315

14.01.2022 If you need any help with getting this sorted for your kids, comment below

12.01.2022 Are you looking for a resource to address the influence of Pornography and other Explicit Sexual Imagery? In The Picture is our recommended resource for second...ary schools. In The Picture provides guidelines, suggested strategies and a wide range of practical resources from which schools can create a whole school approach to explicit sexual imagery that is tailored to suit their unique community and context. This resource supports secondary schools to address the influence of explicit sexual imagery. In The Picture was developed by Maree Crabbe, a world-renowned expert on pornography, young people and sexuality. Maree is Director of the Australian violence prevention project, Reality & Risk: Pornography, young people and sexuality. She is also co-producer and co-director of the broadcast documentary films, Love and Sex in an Age of Pornography and The Porn Factor. As a teaching resource, In The Picture is quite simply without peer in its attention to detail and generosity; as a 21st century curriculum document, it is unsurpassed in educational quality or academic integrity, but as a socially responsive account of our times, it deserves compulsory implementation in schools across the country. Natalie Charles, Director of Staff Development, Melbourne Grammar School In The Picture includes resources for each aspect of a whole school approach, including: * policy * equipping staff * parent partnerships * community partnerships * supportive school contexts * student education * evaluation What does In The Picture provide? * PDF manuals for school leaders (480 pages), teachers (365 pages) and parent and community partnership coordinators (129 pages) * video clips of interviews with young people and performers and directors from the pornography industry for use with students (11 clips with accompanying questions) and as part of a parent education event (7 clips with supporting leaders notes, preparation guidelines and promotional materials) * PowerPoint presentations to support the video clips * customisable (Word) resources (189 pages). To purchase visit https://wachildsafetyservices.com//pornography-and-explic/

11.01.2022 "...just a few of the consequences racism can have on mental health - this isnt just confined to experiencing racism yourself, but witnessing others of your race experiencing it. Racism truly has such a devastating impact on mental health (and of course many other areas of ones life too)." The Depression Project

11.01.2022 When kids start growing and looking like adults, we assume that they should know better and act better. In reality, our kids in high school are struggling and need our mentoring and guidance just as much, if not more than ever. Their brains and bodies are growing and changing; their hormones are flooding their thinking; social media is inundating their every moment, they are expected to know what they are doing with their life and need high marks to get there; fear of reject...ion and peer pressure are paramount, drama is around every corner along with increased violence. This is a time when they are exploring their identity and trying on different hats. Awareness and acknowledgment of these factors through our support, respect, mentoring, and guidance can help ease this stage of growth and transition. SELspace

10.01.2022 Right now she doesnt care about the nights I lie awake worrying about her future. She doesnt care about the tears I shed after our last fight. She doesnt car...e that we agonized over decisions and stressed about choices and struggled sometimes with what to do next. Right now she doesnt remember when I was her whole world, when she begged me to lay down with her, when my hugs could make everything better. She doesnt remember following me everywhere and grabbing on to my leg whenever she needed to steady herself. She doesnt remember falling asleep in my arms. Right now shes busy trying to find herself, find her voice, find her place in this world. Shes busy with her peers, with school, with all the things on her phone. Shes busy trying to break free from the ties that bind us, shes trying to emerge into her own light. And while shes busy doing all the things, I sit and patiently wait for her to come back to me. Because theres something that daughters dont know until much later in life. More often than not, daughters come back to their mothers, even after breaking away. They remember those nights they cried in our arms. They care about the memories of baking cookies and playing in sprinklers and eating ice cream on warm summer nights. They find time to call their mothers and go shopping and sit to have tea. I know this, because I was a teen daughter once too. And despite the way I treated my mom in my teens, despite my pushing her away and fighting her affections and believing she was holding me back, she patiently waited for me to come back to herjust as I will be waiting for my daughters, too. As you try to cut the last remaining strings of our bond, I know I must let you go, so I desperately cling to the hope that one day, not too far off into the future, you will return to me. You will come back to me where I will be waiting with open arms. Because thats what mothers do for their daughters who spend their teen years breaking free.

09.01.2022 I’m raising average kids. They will not be going pro in any sport. They will not be the valedictorian. They will not be landing on the moon. And they will not b...e President. But I pray that they will be extraordinary at love. They will be the friend who makes homemade soup and delivers it when a family loses a loved one. They will always return their grocery carts. They will mow their neighbor’s lawn or shovel their snow-filled driveway just because. They will know how to listenespecially to those who need it most. They will make time to return phone calls. They will still send cards on birthdays. They will know how to forgive. They will be empathy givers. They will know how to say, I’m sorry. They will know how to act vulnerable and cry in someone else’s arms. Oh, and this one’s importantthey’ll know how to love themselves by giving themselves grace, love, time off, and setting boundaries. Yup. I’m raising average kids. Average kids who will be extraordinary at LOVE.

07.01.2022 It is a basic human right to have control over what happens to our own bodies. Often, adults who strongly agree with consent culture somehow miss the mark when it comes to young children. We want to raise adults who: Feel comfortable communicating about what does and doesnt work for them Have the tools to release anger without hurting others... Know that consent is given, and can be taken back at any point Listen right away when someone says stop or dont Lets take advantage of the little, everyday opportunities to show children that everyone gets to decide what happens to their own bodies. Letting a child wipe their own nose or have messy hair for a day are minor sacrifices when weighed against a childs understanding of bodily autonomy and consent. Curious Parenting . . . Love this and caption above from Curious Parenting

06.01.2022 You are their safe place. You are kind of a big deal ETA - Katesurfs wrote this article which this meme is based on http://www.katesurfs.com//the-actual-re...ason-why-children-/ mommysmilk.ec . . For support in your gentle parenting journey get your copy of the new Winter Issue 39 of The Natural Parent Magazine https://linktr.ee/TheNaturalParentMagazine

06.01.2022 If your child has TikTok or Snapchat installed on their device I consider it an unmonitored device. There is no restriction software or amount of personal check...s you can do to limit the adult content of the above two applications. So if you allow these two applications your pornography, bullying, drug, and sextortion talks with your kids should be on point. Happy parenting, Deputy Gomez

03.01.2022 Theres something quite beautiful that happens right before a school program begins. Theres always one child on stage scanning the crowd with eager, almost fra...ntic, eyes. And then suddenly, the childs eyes stop. As she enthusiastically waves at a focal point in the crowd, a visible sigh of relief comes from her small chest. If you follow her gaze to see what brought her such great comfort, you will see love etched across the face of the person who met her gaze. Thats when you know the child just found her reference point, her source of comfort, her go-to place in times of uncertainty and doubt. I think about this beautiful phenomenon every time I feel the pressure that comes with parenting. Because sometimes the experts, the well-meaning friends, the sweet ladies in line behind us at Starbucks, and the critic inside our head suggest there is more to it than just loving them. But I dont care what anybody says. Its the love that sustains them. Whether shes walking out on stage or out of a bad relationship Whether hes stepping into kindergarten or into battle Whether hes taking an honest look inward or a stand for what he believes in Whether shes reaching up to grab her dream or reaching down to help the fallen When faced with the fears, uncertainties, and worries of life, children need a reference pointa place in their mind and heart where they feel loved and safe. And we can provide that. My friends, we can provide that. So lets not worry about doing everything right in this parenting gig. Lets just focus on doing one thing right: a little love each day. Love them as they walk out the door. Love them before they hop out the car. Love them as they pull the covers up to their chin. Love them in such a way that it becomes their reference point in a cruel, harsh world like the sight of a familiar face in a sea of unknown. Rachel Macy Stafford Today let us take the pressure off ourselves and remember its the love that sustains them--despite our failings and missteps. Thanks for being a part of The Hands Free Revolutionletting go of distraction, perfection and pressure to love more and live more. photo credit: www.handsfreemama.com

03.01.2022 Conversations about body autonomy, body boundaries, consent (permission) and respect can begin in the early years.

02.01.2022 Our best is always good enough

02.01.2022 Are your kids using the following apps to stay connected with friends online? Houseparty https://bit.ly/3drMHDk FaceTime https://bit.ly/2WExGrQ Hoop https...://bit.ly/2UQMfGl Messenger https://bit.ly/33HCfDe Skype https://bit.ly/2UwUEQb TikTok https://bit.ly/3bEOPpz YouTube https://bit.ly/2UPW7Ad Instagram https://bit.ly/2R0zszT Learn how to protect their information and report inappropriate content or conduct with The eSafety Guide https://bit.ly/2xZAOnU #ncpw

01.01.2022 When Hailey Fort was just 5 years old, she asked her mother if they could buy a homeless man a sandwich. Within a year of giving lunch to a stranger in need, Ha...iley began growing vegetables to donate to the local food bank. Now, at age 9, helping the homeless has grown into a mission for Hailey and shes taken on a new project -- this year, the Mighty Girl from Bremerton, Washington is building 12 mobile sleeping shelters for homeless people in her community! It just doesnt seem right that there are homeless people," she says. "I think everyone should have a place to live. To Hailey, the logical solution was to find a way to provide shelter so she decided to construct mobile sleeping shelters. The shelters are 8 by 4 foot structures that include windows, a locking front door, and eco-friendly insulation made out of recycled jeans. Although adults help her use the large power saws, she does the rest of the construction herself, helped by phone consultations with her grandfather, who is a contractor. The shelter shes building right now will go to her friend Edward, who has been homeless since he lost his job at a local supermarket. Hes really nice, she says. I dont really want him to be rained on by all the bad weather we get here. Hailey has received a $3000 grant from Together Rising and Momastery to help fund her first group of mobile shelters. Thanks to donations and a 50% discount being provided by the local Lowes Hardware store, she plans to build about a dozen shelters. Shes also continued her gardening efforts and will make donations of fresh produce all summer. Last year, Hailey donated 128 pounds of food and hopes to donate 250 pounds this year. As shes become active on homeless issues, shes also learned about other needs faced by homeless people and aims to hand out 1,000 toiletry items, 500 menstrual products, and 100 coats this year. For now, Hailey spends her time moving between her garden and her first shelter, as well as spreading the word about her fundraising efforts. It will make for a busy summer, but Hailey knows that she has found her calling. When shes asked what shed like to be when she grows up, her immediate answer is a philanthropist: someone who takes care of people. To support Haileys fundraising campaign to cover the cost of additional shelters, visit http://bit.ly/1Q8raBf -- you can also follow her updates on Facebook at Haileys Harvest. For several excellent books to talk to children about the challenges faced by others in need, we recommend Maddis Fridge for ages 4 to 8 (http://www.amightygirl.com/maddi-s-fridge) and "Also Known As Harper" for ages 9 to 12 (http://www.amightygirl.com/also-known-as-harper). For stories showing girls and women in building roles, check out Building Our House for age 3 to 8 (http://www.amightygirl.com/building-our-house) and How A House Is Built for age 5 to 8 (http://www.amightygirl.com/how-a-house-is-built). For a variety of open-ended building toys that encourage kids interest in building, check out our blog post, "Putting It All Together: Top 20 Building Toys for Mighty Girls" at http://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=7742 And, for Mighty Girl stories for children and teens that emphasize the value of compassion, visit our "Kindness & Compassion" section at http://www.amightygirl.com/boo/personal-development/values

01.01.2022 Wear a little bit of red today to remember Daniel and to support the work his parents continue to do to keep our kids safe The Daniel Morcombe website has numerous resources to help you reach your kids about personal safety and how you can get your school involved #dayfordaniel