Valli Jones in West Burleigh, Queensland, Australia | Mental health service

Valli Jones

Locality: West Burleigh, Queensland, Australia

Phone: +61 413 415 576

Address: 4-5/33 Tallebudgera Creek Rd 4219 West Burleigh, QLD, Australia

Website: http://vallijones.com.au

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25.01.2022 For many, these are difficult times. It will be more important than ever to be giving this Christmas as COVID means the usual charity-hosted large gatherings won't be permitted. A small donation from those of us who can means a lot for those of us who can't right now <3

23.01.2022 Let’s teach our kids to seek diversity, equity, inclusion, and justice. (For skin color, for religion, for differing ideas, and more)

23.01.2022 Tip Tuesdays PDF of visual posted at www.AffinityConsulting.info Alright parents, there have been a lot of on-line 'tips' for eveyone as we stay at home. We ta...lk a lot about the behaviour of the kids but let's take a moment and talk about yours.... Some of you may be ready for a little check in, so I made you a chart. That's right a chart for the parents! It's a check in to remind you that your kids take their lead from you. Just like we help the kids track what they are doing here is one for you. You can put whatever is important to you on your list. Writing it down and posting it will help you remember it in the moment when you are not at your best, cause you are human and trying to navigate this new reality. See more

23.01.2022 For the parents of kids who ask the question is santa real?... What a beautiful way to explain it to your older children Son: "Dad, I think I'm old enough t...o know now. Is there a Santa Claus?" Not being the world's fastest thinker, I stalled for time. Dad: "OK, I agree that you're old enough. But before I tell you, I have a question for you. You see, the truth is a dangerous gift. Once you know something, you can't un-know it. Once you know the truth about Santa Claus, you will never again understand and relate to him as you do now. So my question is: Are you sure you want to know?" Brief pause. Son: "Yes. I want to know." Dad: "OK, I'll tell you: Yes, there IS a Santa Claus." Son: "Really?" Dad: "Yes, really, but he's not an old man with a beard in a red suit. That's just what we tell kids. You see, kids are too young to understand the true nature of Santa Claus, so we explain it to them in a way that they can understand. The truth about Santa Claus is that he's not a person at all; he's an idea.... Think of all those presents Santa gave you over the years. I actually bought those myself.... I watched you open them. And did it bother me that you didn't thank me? Of course not! In fact it gave me great pleasure. You see, Santa Claus is THE IDEA OF GIVING FOR THE SAKE OF GIVING, without thought of thanks or acknowledgement. When I saw that woman collapse on the subway last week and called for help, I knew that she'd never know that it was me who summoned the ambulance. I was being Santa Claus when I did that." Son: "Oh." Dad: "So now that you know, you're part of it. You have to be Santa Claus too now. That means you can never tell a young kid the secret, and you have to help us select Santa presents for them, and most important, you have to look for opportunities to help people. Got it?"

23.01.2022 Those of us with neurodivergent children will be aware of this concept. It serves to explain why teachers say our kids are "fine" or "had a really good day" and yet the second they get home (or sometimes even before we've left the school gates) they blow up in our face.

22.01.2022 I don't know about you, but this has been a tough parenting season for us. The fear is real, the hard conversations are in full swing, and it seems like the sma...llest things require significant cost/benefit analyses. I thought it might be a good time to dig back into The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting research. It's been helping us (huge thanks to all of the research participants). This first learning is a reminder of the core finding from this research: Some of the best strategies rely on modeling the behaviors we want to see. Turns out that we need to be the adult that we want our kids to grow up to be. Dammit. There is immeasurable power in our children watching us practice self-kindness vs. berating ourselves or putting ourselves down when we stumble, fail, or make mistakes. And, no matter how we encourage them to talk to themselves, they are definitely watching to see what really matters. And, letting them in on our process is equally as powerful: "I really dropped the ball today and I'm struggling to be kind to myself about it and talk to myself the way I'd talk to someone I love." Modeling, normalizing that it isn't easy, and connecting. Y'all have a great weekend! Awkward, brave and kind, folks.

22.01.2022 School this year won't look like it ever has before. We are redesigning instruction, prioritizing standards and curriculum, and reassessing what our students ne...ed most at this time. As we reimagine education, teaching, and learning, let's also take a minute to redefine "whole body listening" and its implementation, too. . . . This outdated practice is problematic in so many ways. . . . It demands that our students prove they are engaged by moving, sitting, listening, acting in identical ways. But diverse brains have diverse needs. . . . It reinforces ableist community standards: "neurotypicals learn, focus, and engage in this way--and so should you." . . . It is often developmentally inappropriate for numerous students in any given class, and therefore is inappropriate as a whole-class expectation. . . . And it is mentally, physically, and psychologically harmful. We need to be teaching our students to listen and respond to what their body needs, not forcing it to sit, move, and focus in a way someone else deems appropriate. Teaching students to ignore what their body needs to learn and focus can and does lead to mental health issues, self-harming behaviors, toxic stress, and internalized ableism. It can also make students more susceptible to manipulation and abuse, as they have been trained to ignore what feels right to their body and instead conform to what adults tell them is best. . . . Is this really what we want our students to be learning? . . . As you design class rules and expectations for your room this year--whatever that "room" looks like--I hope you are prioritizing student engagement and learning, rather than enforcing outdated policies of policing students' bodies. My whole body is listening when I'm twirling a fidget, sitting on my feet, possibly "staring off into space." What does your "whole body listening" look like? What does your students'? . . . Picture ID: Text over a watercolor rainbow background reads: Whole body listening is ableist, developmentally inappropriate, and harmful. Speech bubble surround the main text and read: "Eyes on your teacher!" "Feet on the floor." "Quiet hands!" "No mouth noises." "Sitting criss-cross applesauce!" The Neurodivergent Teacher's logo is at the bottom. #BackToSchool #WholeBodyListening #SchoolRules #ClassroomRules #VirtualTeaching #VirtualClassroom #RemoteLearning #QuarenTeaching

19.01.2022 This is a long-ish but worthwhile read for parents and teachers, before our children return to school next week <3

17.01.2022 Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. Viktor F...rankl The POWER of the PAUSE When you feel you might lose it, PAUSE Pause - and a gap/space opens up In that space - breathe - slowly and deeply Silence ANY stories you are telling yourself Out of that still place choose the response from the wisdom of your heart.

15.01.2022 Do you want to talk to your young child about issues of social justice, but don’t know how? You’re not alonemost adults find topics like race, gender, and class difficult to talk about with children. But if we don’t find ways to talk about it, children will learn whatever they can glean from unspoken messages, and that doesn’t often work out very well...You may find some of the resources below useful.

11.01.2022 As loving, committed, great parents, there is nothing that feels right about moving our children closer to the things that increase their anxiety. But every tim...e our kids or teens avoid the things that make them feel anxious (but which are safe), the amygdala (the part of the brain that scans the world for threat and initiates anxiety) learns that the only way to feel safe in this situation is to avoid. This will make anxiety more fierce next time because the need to protect will be greater. Learning that avoidance turns fear into relief will drive the same response (avoidance) in the future. One of the hardest things about anxiety is that the only way through is through. The only way for the amygdala to learn that a situation is safe is by experience - by moving towards that situation little step by little step and until the feelings of anxiety ease, which they always will. This doesn’t have to happen all at once and it doesn’t have to happen quickly. It’s okay if this happens gently and if it takes as long as it takes. The important part is moving them towards brave behaviour. It’s why understanding where anxiety comes from and why it feels the way it does (which is all explained in Hey Warrior) can be so powerful. This takes the fear out of the fear just enough so they can be brave enough. The question for our kiddos then, is, ‘I understand this feels big and I understand it feels scary, but what can you do to move towards [the situation], which is a little more than last time, but which feels okay enough.’ This will start to create a different story - that they can feel anxious, and be brave. Anxiety is a warning sign, not a stop sign, and most often it is a call to be brave. See more

09.01.2022 My son and I were walking in our neighbourhood recently when a father and little boy walked past us. The little boy was crying. The father said to the little bo...y, Stop crying or your mother is going to hear about this when we get home. I said nothing to my son and we kept walking. Moments later my six-year-old said, Why did that Dad tell the boy to stop crying? You can’t just stop crying when there’s a reason. You have to get the tears out. Why did that Dad even want him to stop crying? Our kids are wise. And when we parent through a relationship that is unafraid of tears and emotions of any kind, our kids don’t become scared either. They see them as normal. Sad, angry and frustrated are just as valid and necessary as their positive counterparts. Just as the waves are not the ocean, our children are not their emotions. Their emotions pass and we need to learn to ride the waves, rather than try to bend reality. Many of us were raised to stuff negative emotions deep down where they couldn’t be seen. And so we repeat it, without a conscious thought. Or we try to fix it by distracting our kids to make the hurt go away because it feels painful for us to see our kids in pain. But more often than not, what I’ve found is that when I allow my son to feel disappointment or sadness and walk through it with him, he bounces back far quicker than I expected. We allow our kids to become resilient when we make space for their emotions. When we’re brave enough to sit with a crying child, whether in our living rooms or on the sidewalk, we validate their feelings. They learn that we have their backs, that they’re not alone with their emotions and when we hold them up to the light together, rather than make them hide alone in dark places, they’re not so scary after all. #raisedgood See more

08.01.2022 I love how Hannah Gadsby opens up about her autism in Douglas, by reflecting on a hilarious lesson she had as a kid at school.

07.01.2022 "The results suggest that while about 90% of gamers are not playing in a way that is dysfunctional or detrimental to the individual’s life, there is still a sizable minority who are truly addicted to video games and suffer addiction symptoms over time."

06.01.2022 5 Strategies to deal with lying 1. Remember, it’s normal. Catching your child in a lie can be frustrating but remembering that it’s a normal pa...rt of growing up can help us keep calm. We aren’t raising sociopaths! Just little ones whose motivation is to avoid punishment. 2. Don’t ask questions that you already know the answer to. If your son is smeared in chocolate cake, don’t say, ‘did you eat the chocolate cake?’ Of course he’ll lie! Instead say, ‘I can see you ate some chocolate cake. You must have been hungry huh?’ Then pause and ask, ‘Do you think I’m pleased or upset? Why? What should we do next time?’ 3. Celebrate honesty. When your child is honest, even if they’ve done something wrong, acknowledge their truthfulness. Say, ‘I really appreciate that you’ve told me about what has gone wrong.’ Help them fix it and then talk about how to do better in the future. And don’t punish them or threaten to punish them for lying. Research shows this will cause more lying in the future. They’ll be afraid of you. 4. Extract a simple promise. Studies show that children are less likely to lie once they have promised to tell the truth. But be gentle. If they tell you the truth, and then you punish them severely, they will be less likely to tell the truth in the future, promise or not. 5. Model good behaviour. As adults we are all guilty of social ‘white’ lies. Telling a friend that you have an appointment when you simply don’t want to go to their get together, for example. Our kids are looking to us to learn how to behave. Little white lies show them it’s okay to bend the truth.

05.01.2022 Mentoring Girls Training: New Low Tuition Learn online to lead Mentoring Circles . Get started for $29 with coupon below... Now, more than ever, we want every girl to: Claim her self-worth with confidence Tune into her inner compass - her deepest, truest self Have good friends and be a good friend Speak her truth to power and to peers Understand, honor and care for her changing body . JOIN HERE: JourneyOfYoungWomen.org/No-Frills-Mentoring-Girls-Training . Thirteen Teaching Videos (20 self-paced hours) Vibrant community of students and active mentors Optional, juicy Zoom meet-ups 3x/month Dozens of handouts Abundant post-graduate support to lead Mentoring Circles . LEARN: Create a Safe and Effective Container Rhythm of a Mentoring Circle Cultivate Physical, Emotional & Social Well-being Understand and Honor Menstruation & Sexuality Listen to Intuition Consent & Body Sovereignty Ceremony & Rites of Passage Lead Parent Circles Fee-setting and Marketing . WHAT STUDENTS SAY: Phenomenal! I felt at a loss to raise my daughters through puberty and beyond. I didn’t want them to feel as I had or make the same mistakes. Now I’m able to guide them on a different path ~ Julie, UK Invaluable knowledge, tools and resources to mentor girls! Profoundly shifted my relationship to my adolescence, to my mother, and to my grandmothers ~ Caitlin, USA I learned I have gifts to offer by tapping into my life experience. My confidence grew with each lesson ~ Elizabeth, AU The mentor journey is for those who would counter the toxic messages children receive - about who to be, how to be, their bodies - with self-knowledge and empowerment ~ GC, CA I'm set to help girls tune into their inner guidance system. And more. Thank you, JOYW! ~ Cadence, USA Truly blown away. Katharine speaks from the heart, inspires action, and is living the medicine of her teachings. I've spent thousands on University programs. THIS course has been the most life-enhancing ~ Jodi, CA I now confidently speak of menstruation, puberty and sexuality. I listen to my intuition and help my daughter tune into her body's wisdom ~ Manpreet, India If we unconditionally love ourselves during our own journey of transformation, we'll pass that on as we mentor girls ~ JD, Ireland I've not seen anything that remotely compares. Information and resources are so expansive. Katharine responds to all with such care ~ Louise, AU If this training calls you, answer YES! There's LIVENESS. Not a boring run-of-the-mill course. It is a juicy, enlivening, sacred space with much practical wisdom imparted ~ Sarah, USA Worth every penny, every hour of effort. Parent-wise and now as a mentor ~ Nia, UK . Get started for $29 with MentorGirls coupon JourneyOfYoungWomen.org/No-Frills-Mentoring-Girls-Training . Art by Karen MacKenzie

03.01.2022 "Poppy, who is autistic, struggles with the constant noise and chatter of a classroom full of boisterous students. "If they said that people could, if they wanted to, just continue working from home I would totally just work from home," the 15-year-old says."

01.01.2022 Join me and leading parenting experts in this FREE Happily Family Online Conference Oct 5-9. We talk about mindfulness, current brain research, teens and toddle...rs, coping with anxiety, screens, gender and sexuality, school, and navigating friendships - https://conference.happilyfamily.com/?orid=10484&opid=21 #MindfulParenting #parenting #Mindfulness See more

01.01.2022 #Repost @drbeckyathome I know something about the group of parents here: we are all trying to do the best for our kids. Here's something else I know:... we have hard moments when we just can't hold it all together. If you've emotionally lost it on your child, here's the one thing that means: you're human.You're part of a club that includes every single parent I know, including me. Welcome. Stay. Let's connect & hang out & learn together. Ok, so what do we do after we've lost it? Well, we don’t start with the words on the post. We have to repair with ourselves before we can repair with our children. Follow the steps below: 1. Place your feet on the floor & your hand on your heart. Pause.This position is a perfect antidote to the way your body & mind are likely spinning out of control.We have to ground ourselves first.This position can help you re-find yourself. 2. Take 5 deep breaths,deep into your belly & then slowly out. You're not trying to achieve anything here, you're just bringing your attention back to this moment. Notice any self blame and greet it ("Hi self-blame voice! Yes, you do tend to pile on to my most challenging moments. I could have predicted you would pop up. Hello!"). 3. Tell yourself these words: "I'm here. I'm a good parent who had a hard time.I'm a good person. Nothing about me has changed." Repeat a few times until you feel a bit more grounded & until something in your body has released a bit. Now... & only now... find your child. Use the words in this post or use your own. Key elements of a repair are an apology, telling a story to help your child understand what happened, explicitly stating that your behavior isn't caused by or the fault of your child, sharing your dedication to change, & asserting your child's goodness and your love. And more important than these words are the non-verbal elements of the repair, as a child "hears" this before he can even process your language. This is why your internal repair is so critical - it will allow you to soften within yourself and then you can approach your child in this same way. What questions or follow-up do you have here? How can I support you and how can we support each other ?